We are not blind the the overwhelming numbers of relationship posts here on isitnormal.com. but who are we seeking our advice from? happy committed couples or people who could use some relationship advice themselves?
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Most of the time I will say; "I've never been in a relationship, so I don't know if I will be much help. But I'll try." Or something to that effect.
I don't think you need to be in a relationship or a prior relationship to give good advice. Plus, having no experience allows us "singles" to come from another perspective.
And I like you purple too by the way!
I won't have Gold much longer, so I'm going through all the colors before it is gone. I like the purple too. Thanks. :}
You are in a sandwich again Black Forest.
;)
Having pride in being single is weird. Being single is hardly an achievement for most people.
You know, I see the word proud being thrown about a lot. Proud to be American, proud to be christian, proud to be single, proud to be gay, whatever, and I just don't understand it. Aren't you supposed to be proud of achievments? What you've done? Saying you're proud of simply what you are, to me is having pride in nothing at all. It's just, I don't know, I can't understand how someone can say they're proud to have done nothing. Anyone get where I'm coming from? Am I missing some sort of idea here?
Thank God someone else understands. I have been wondering for years why anyone feels the need to be proud about something as stupid as a relationship status, sexuality, etc. The heck is there to be proud about?
If I was single, I'd be unable to honestly return your Holla proudly, but I think it shows a lot of open-mindedness that so many people here can :)
we have good days and bad, times when we fight and times when we agree.
HOWEVER - that being said, just because someone is single doesn't mean they cannot give good relationship advice. Sometimes good advice is just based off of common sense.
Saying that they're unqualified... is a bit like those parents who pull the "you don't have kids!" card whenever someone makes a comment about kids. As if you have to be a parent to know that say... it's bad to let your kid run into traffic.
Common sense is a commodity ANYONE can possess. In fact sometimes advice from someone who ISN'T in a relationship can be better because it may be unbiased.
If it is the end of my marriage, I am throwing the towel in on relationships for a good decade.
Good luck.
Sure it may be nice to be in a relationship, but I value my alone time too.
What are the things the two of you did? If you don't mind me asking...
Before marriage my typical relationship would last anywhere from 4 months to a year.
My advice pulls from observation of failed and successful relationships as well as analysis of my own failed and successful relationships. I have had a great deal many relationships so I have had many good opportunities to do this analysis.
Because I am NeuroNeptunian, and NeuroNeptunian is long-winded, I will end my jabbering with my "final word" as far as relationship advice goes: Communication. If you can't openly and honestly communicate with someone, then you can't be in a relationship with them, I don't care how much you love them. If you don't know how to communicate openly and honestly, then you aren't ready for a relationship. Pride is poisen when it comes to long term relationships.
Like you said, the key to a good relationship is communication. It's not being overly compliant just for the sake of avoiding arguments.
For example, I've seen your comments on a couple of posts, and I think you're an intelligent person. So even though I disagree with you on this one, that doesn't mean I don't respect you. You can stay proud.
I'm not advocating compliance, but if someone is so proud of their viewpoint that they're completely unwilling to even admit that it could be flawed or be flexible for the sake of reaching an agreement, the relationship isn't gonna work =/
But either way. Just something that I have learned from my relationships. Someone that is too "proud" of their own viewpoints will not shut the fuck up, whether or not the other party agrees to disagree. And they never seem to understand why they're broken up with either, because they're awesome v.v
But I'm not proud to be single, what is there to be proud of. I personally "like" being single and free though, I love living my own life on my own. I know that I'll eventually find someone who I would like to be with and guess what I won't be proud that I would be in a relationship. I would be proud of the fact I found someone special, someone that has similar interests and qualities I enjoy and that is something to actually to be proud of in my thoughts.
I dunno , I think that even if people listening are single , an outside view on things can usually be much clearer so whatever their own situation I'm grateful for any opinions myself.