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Would you rather have the girl with the pretty fac...

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No. The fact that you're an asshole makes you an asshole.
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I have a good reason to be an asshole! ....It's a hell of a lot of fun.
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You're a sweet asshole! ;)
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You taste assholes?
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You'd be amazed at the big bucks involved in being an assommelier.
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Can I have 5 bucks?
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No, a bitter asshole with sour notes owes the house 50 bucks in this business. Get used to it.
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:(
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