Dildo

a knife.

Hmmmm. This should get a few sarcastic comments. How about a cucumber, but that is so cold. Maybe a long-neck beer bottle (open it first and remove the beer). How about a monkey's fist - probably not too common? Do you have a pet?
That is a tough question. Maybe ask your neighbor to borrow a dildo.

i guess a big polish sausage or a big hunk of pickled boloney rope would really work well.

Barbed-wire bat with nails should work fine.

FIREPOKER

what's a "didlo"

i'd say thats a razor

BANNANA OR A LARG ROUNG NAROW OBJECT ( AM A GUY BUT HAVE A SIS SO I KINDA KNOW

How the hell do you know? Do you watch your sister while she's using foreign objects in a perverse fashion that the object was not intended to be used for?

well you could use a number of things i understand people commenting haven't been helping at all.you could try using a cucumber although they are cold like deric said or you could use something like a shower head or a hand i know you have one of those or maybe you could use a FUZE drink bottle (drink the whatever is in it first) or a large carrot.

cucmbers are only cold if they have just been in the fridge. Run warm water over it and its all good. Also, some toothbrush holders are good.

THE DEVIL MIGHT HAVE SOMETHING. IM GUESSING HE POPS IN NOW AND THEN INTO UR MALADJUSTED RESIDENCE.

look i know u need hlp try like carrots or cucumbers or leike white board markers CD spindles(what you but packs of 50 cds on)
and go to ur local shop have a look at waht u thinkwould be good and buy it then use it not the other way round lols

yes indid, a knife...