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How to get off a speeding ticket!
A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange:

Officer: May I see your driver's license?
Driver: I don't have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI.
Officer: May I see the owner's card for this vehicle?
Driver: It's not my car. I stole it.
Officer: The car is stolen?
Driver: That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owner's card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.
Officer: There's a gun in the glove box?
Driver: Yes sir. That's where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk.
Officer: There's a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?
Driver: Yes, sir.

Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation:
Captain: Sir, can I see your license?
Driver: Sure. Here it is.
It was valid.
Captain: Who's car is this?
Driver: It's mine, officer. Here's the owner card.
The driver owned the car.
Captain: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there's a gun in it?
Driver: Yes, sir, but there's no gun in it.
Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.
Captain: Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told you said there's a body in it.
Driver: No problem.
Trunk is opened; no body.
Captain: I don't understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the
glove box, and that there was a dead body in the trunk.
Driver: Yeah, I'll bet the lying b*s***d told you I was speeding, too!
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Comments (7)
thats funny..but tell me if it works if you try it for real!!!
lol..jk..I dint want to get you introuble!
Too long.
Classic joke *GIGGLES* everytime
This is an old one but a classic. I've been tempted to try this little ruse on an officer, but speeding is not one of my usual practices. Rear-ending and fender-bending seems to be my specialty.
@: JanIAm
I think that made me giggle more than the joke, nice one!
@: JanIAm
I am more of a gender bender myself lmao. When I am driving I wanna get from where I am to where I am going as soon as physically pos. Get some weird looks from the younger drivers when they see an "old man with grey hair" flying past them.
awww, your fav faggot didnt last long did it lmfao
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