http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pY8jaGs7xJ0

i have heard that before !!!!! loser

When you occasionally have a really bad day, and you just need to take it out on someone, don't take it out on someone you know, take it out on someone you don't know. I was sitting at my desk when I remembered a phone call I'd forgotten to make. I found the number and dialed it. A man answered, saying "Hello."

I politely said, "This is Chris. Could I please speak with Robyn Carter?"

Suddenly a manic voice yelled out in my ear "Get the right f***ing number!" and the phone was slammed down on me. I couldn't believe that anyone could be so rude. When I tracked down Robyn's correct number to call her, I found that I had accidentally transposed the last two digits.

After hanging up with her, I decided to call the 'wrong' number again. When the same guy answered the phone, I yelled "You're an asshole!" and hung up. I wrote his number down with the word 'asshole' next to it, and put it in my desk drawer. Every couple of weeks, when I was paying bills or had a really bad day, I'd call him up and yell, "You're an asshole!" It always cheered me up.

When Caller ID was introduced, I thought my therapeutic 'asshole' calling would have to stop. So, I called his number and said, "Hi, this is John Smith from the telephone company. I'm calling to see if you're familiar with our Caller ID Program?" He yelled "NO!" and slammed down the phone. I quickly called him back and said, "That's because you're an asshole!" and hung up.

One day I was at the store, getting ready to pull into a parking spot. Some guy in a black BMW cut me off and pulled into the spot I had patiently waited for. I hit the horn and yelled that I'd been waiting for that spot, but the idiot ignored me. I noticed a "For Sale" sign in his back window, so I wrote down his number.

A couple of days later, right after calling the first asshole (I had his number on speed dial), I thought that I'd better call the BMW asshole, too. I said, "Is this the man with the black BMW for sale?" He said, "Yes, it is.". I asked, "Can you tell me where I can see it?"

He said, "Yes, I live at 34 Oaktree Blvd , in Fairfax . It's a yellow cape, and the car's parked right out in front.". I asked, "What's your name?". He said, "My name is Don Hansen,". I asked, "When's a good time to catch you, Don?". He said, "I'm home every evening after five."

I said, "Listen, Don, can I tell you something?". He said, "Yes?".

I said, "Don, you're an asshole!". Then I hung up, and added his number to my speed dial, too.

Now, when I had a problem, I had two assholes to call.

Then I came up with an idea. I called asshole ...1.

He said, "Hello.". I said, "You're an asshole!" (But I didn't hang up.)

He asked, "Are you still there?"

I said, "Yeah,"

He screamed, "Stop calling me,"

I said, "Make me,"

He asked, "Who are you?"

I said, "My name is Don Hansen."

He said, "Yeah? Where do you live?" I said, "Asshole, I live at 34 Oaktree Blvd. , in Fairfax , a yellow cape, I have a black Beamer parked in front."

He said, "I'm coming over right now, Don. And you had better start saying your prayers."

I said, "Yeah, like I 'm really scared, asshole," and hung up.

Then I called Asshole ...2.

He said, "Hello?"

I said, "Hello, asshole,"

He yelled, "If I ever find out who you are..."

I said, "You'll what?"

He exclaimed, "I'll kick your ass,"

I answered, "Well, asshole, here's your chance. I'm coming over right now."

Then I hung up and immediately called the police, saying that I lived at 34 Oaktree Blvd , in Fairfax , and that I was on my way over there to kill my gay lover.

Then I called Channel 9 News about the gang war going down in Oaktree Blvd. in Fairfax .

I quickly got into my car and headed over to Fairfax . I got there just in time to watch two assholes beating the crap out of each other in front of six cop cars, an overhead news helicopter and surrounded by a news crew.

NOW I feel much better. Anger management really does work.

Oh my, a big tough guy called me a loser..


Faggot.

Well, at last, someone has posted a previously written joke/article/lyrics that was funny. I'm still waiting for the "If You Want Me to" poster to deliver my lyrics from the 1958 classic, "Tequila."

http://www.rhapsody.com/album/20bestof50srocknroll/tequila/lyrics.html

"'Tequila' is a 1958 surf instrumental by the band The Champs. The title of the song constitutes the entire lyrics and is said only three times. "Tequila" is popular amongst fans of the golden age of rock and roll, but the band was a one-hit wonder." (Wikipedia)

I was just trying to be an ass for requesting lyrics for a song that had but one word in it. Interestingly enough, the same site you list here also attributes these lyrics to another group called The Challengers. (Not really giving a fuck about lyrics from 50s songs in general, I have no idea why I'm putting in all the research.)

Boring and long.

Because you love us Jan? lmao

It might be long but no one ever said it was boring before raflmao.

funny but hell no