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sexual assault?
Ok...so I don't really have the guts to talk about this with my friends or any of my guy friends yet to get their perspective on this situation. I hope that it's ok that I get only somewhat explicit, as it's slightly necessary for whether it really was assault or something.I'm in college and last night I was at a frat party. My friends decided to leave at some point in the night, but I had just started talking to these few guys that I was interested in, so I decided to stay behind. This one particular guy comes up to me later in the kitchen, and we end up talking, and he asks if we can kiss. Eventually we take it downstairs to where no one is and it's dark. Things progressed, and I don't think I felt fully comfortable the whole time, but I knew I had gotten myself into this situation and felt like I just needed to stay until things were "done". Sorry for the details, but I was giving him oral, and it just didn't seem like it was going to really finish him off. I basically just wanted to be done at this point, so I was going to let him do what he wanted (I'm a virgin, so I wasn't going to go that far though...). Basically, I let him get in the position where he was right behind me. He knew I was nervous and didn't want to do anything ( i think i told him i didn't want to do THAT) and he told me not to worry and trust him. But then...he just did it anyways. I don't think I was really sure what was going on, but then I suddenly freaked out and told him to stop. I'm not really sure if I pulled away or if he pulled out, but he stopped. And I immediately started hyperventilating, and he was asking me if I was ok and he said sorry that he took it too far. He seemed really apologetic, and worried, and I felt like that I put myself in the situation where it may have seemed like i wanted it, despite my body language. I walked back to my dorm and basically didn't breath the whole time and I couldn't move my fingers or arms because I lost circulation.
So...does it seem like sexual assault?
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Like you said you put yourself in the situation and you women have to learn men cant turn it off as easy as you women can. When we get aroused we need release
If you said no and meant it than you were violated. Date rape or therabouts. The courts would probably think this too. But to be honest I think the guy was not malicious, just overeager.
Sorry you went through this. You were indeed lucky the guy did stop. MOST wouldn't have. I think this should be a lesson learnt and heeded for future refference. Always leave with those you trust NO MATTER WHAT. By merrit of the fact you are female, you will always be at risk if you allow yourself into situations like this. IT WAS STUPID.
Incidentally, you dont mention condoms! If one was not used get checked in 5 to 6 weeks time.
When you said stop he stoped you may have told him you didnt want him to do it but really it sounds to me like you were not really serious sounding when you said it. Of course you could say you were a victom of rape for 1 whole second (good luck prooving that) with barely any penetration but really you got your self into this and he did stop so be more careful next time in your choice of guys to blow.