Hi, I am 22 year old female. I have been with my boyfriend for over 3 years now. We are very serious about each other, and often talk of marriage. However, there is one problem I have with our relationship. We have had sex since day 1 of our relationship (please don't judge), but he has never given me an orgasm. I have been faking ever since he said he loved me (around the 6 month mark) because I didn't want him to feel bad (and trust me he did). I have been basically lying to him about having orgasms for over 2 and half years? What should I do? I can't exactly tell him. And I can't exactly go through life without having an orgasm. I know this is going to sound bad, but sometimes, I am so disinterested in sex that I tell him to hurry up and get it over with. This, of course, makes him upset. I have no idea what to do. HELP!!!
although there is "stories" of females that just dont..
You should have never faked your orgasm. And, you should have tried to find out what the underlying problem was in the first few weeks of the relationship. But, I understand it can be pretty hard to talk about sex, at that early age and stage.
I would suggest that you have no choice but to tell him that you have been faking the orgasms all along. If you do miraculously start having orgasms in the future, then he'll know you were faking them it in the past. Undoubtedly, this realization is contributing to your inability to climax. Moreover, being able to climax in the first place requires emotional connection and trust. I don't know if your relationship will survive such an admission, but what other choice do you have? Cheat on him with someone else?
Otherwise, you probably need to see a sex therapist, as there is likely emotional damage owing to the length of time this has gone on, and the original source of the problem hasn't been identified. On the other hand, you might be able to climax with another man.