what do I do?
My boyfriend and I have been together for a year. He is 21 and I am 18. My parents love him and God only knows how much I love him! His rents love me also and his little sister and big bro are like family to me. BUT....he likes to joke around and I dont know if i am over reacting but when he jokes and says shut up. It hurts but with in the next hour he does it again after I told him to stop and its not funny. He has no car, no license, lives with his parents and has a bulls*it job. ( works maybe 2 days a week for maybe 4 hours.) I know I am not much better but I have a car and I work like crazy. But I also JUST finished school. He has not signed up for college yet and he constantally spends every little amount of money he gets on XBOX games and PC games and parts. He is he sweetest guy ever but has no motivation, and always jokes around when I say its not funny but to him it hilarious. To me he needs to grow up but i dont want to leave him because I have had nothing but beating and herassments etc. in my past and I am finally in a way happy and I love and car about him SO much. I tell him he needs to get off his as* and make some changes but he makes all these excuses and it bugs me. I just dont know what to do. I dont want to have to support him in the future. I want someone to be responsible so if in the future we have kids and a place and all that I know I am not his mother also and that hes responsible enough to hold down his own things.... what do i do????
Tell him straight either he changes or you ARE going to leave. If he loves you he will make the changes, if he doesn't then you are better off without him.
This story I've heard over and over again and the girl knows what has to be done but is looking for confirmation.
It doesn't matter is you love him, if he is not responsible, disrespectful and has no drive to improve his financial status for the future, then this is clearly not a guy to build your future around.
Because you made poor choices in the past does not mean you have to make more poor choices for your future.
Do not have sex with him. Sex bonds people and it is likely causing you to resist leaving him. Be strong and move on, tell him you want to end your relationship.
Any guy who tells you to shut up repeatedly is a bad guy, simple as that.
So if you love him, just be there for him, and try to kick some sence into him, but not like imposed, it has to be his decision.