Is it normal to have horrible thoughts/paranoia?
Well, first off. For about a year or so, I have been having these horrible, impure thoughts. They have been about killing, Satan, and sometimes sex. Sometimes I have thoughts about how I could kill my parakeet. But really I love him to death, he is the most adorable birdie. And I have these bad thoughts of how I could crush the life out of him. I hate it. Then I sometimes have thoughts about my brother or my dad being killed. For example, I was coming home from school and my brother wasn't on the bus; he stayed after, and I opened the garage and started to go upstairs into the house and push the button to close the garage. When I have this thought about my brother being under it and being crushed to death by the garage. And I hate it, because I truly love my brother. Also, about my dad. Sometimes I get thoughts of how he can get a heart attack and die, and how he could get shot. But I don't like thinking these thoughts, because I love my dad, brother, and my bird.
Also, I get so paranoid that people are watching me and talking about me. For example, this woman...I don't know who she is, she has been sitting outside of my house in her car for 4 years now!! She just sits there in her car outside of our house while my brother and I are waiting for the bus. But sometimes when my brother shouts, just to see if she reacts. She does! She drives off really fast, but she comes back the next day. I know she is spying on me and that she is writing information about me down for the government! I know it. And I know there are cameras in my house, watching my every move.
Also, I hear voices even when no one is around. I sometimes hear my name being whispered and someone saying "kill, Satan, Hell." But I know I'm not crazy! It is normal, right? I have many other problems, but I'm tired of typing.
Also, I have so many thoughts of killing someone, I know how to do it and how to clean up the mess. But I truly know that I cannot do it, because I could never do anything like that. But I know I'm capable of it, and that scares the crap out of me. I just wish all of these thoughts could go away.
idk if its normal....i dont think it is maybe we will be serial killers? ill tell my shrink
Good luck, God Bless.
I think a little paranoia is good in today's society, you really don't know who is out to get you or why. Being paranoid allows you to be vigilant and sharp-eyed. On the other hand if you let paranoia run your life then you definitely have a problem and should seek advice. I find that if I get too paranoid I realise it and can deal with it. It might not be so easy for you though.