Are You Normal?
Curious how others might perceive your situation? Submit your story today and find out what others think...
Am I Bi?
I think I might be bisexual, but I'm not sure because I don't know how to define the word or my thoughts.
Please hear me out.
I'm a young male adult who has for all his life been sexually attracted to females. I think they're absolutely beautiful and are true works of nature's art.
But that's just my sexual attraction. Because they've always either ignored me or treated me poorly. The same girls I thought were pretty were the ones making fun of me in school and laughing at me and everthing. Not only that but I've found them to be very hard to talk to in general. It's so hard for me to open up to a girl, and the whole thought of doing so is just scary. I like them physically and for the sexual attraction, but past that I lose interest fast.
However, with guys it's a different thing. Aside from maybe 2 girls I know, all my friends have been male. I find them much easier to talk to and much more accepting of me as a person. They're not as mean or hurtful as what girls have been to me.
I've found myself really really attracted to several of my guy friends because of this. I can never open up to a girl, so opening up to my male friends is my only alternative. And that closeness gives me an attraction. But not sexual.
See that is my problem that I don't understand.
With females, I really don't like the way they think, how they act and treat me, etc. But they are appealling sexually, and I really really want to have sex with one (I'm still a virgin). So whereas I'm attracted to them physically and would really enjoy having sex, I don't think I'm mentally or socially compatable with one. And with males, it's the opposite. The male body does nothing for me in the way of getting me sexually aroused or excited (the male body is actually a turn off) but as for opening up and making a deep loving connection, I find myself able to do this.
So basically I'm really confused. On one end I'm heavily attracted physically and sexually, but very repelled mentally and socially. And on the other end, I'm heavily attracted mentally and socially, but very repelled physically and sexually.
It's so hard for me to even gather myself. Because if I ever get in a relationship with a guy, there will be no sex because I'm not attracted like that and the idea disgusts me. But if I get into one with a female, there will likely be no real connection there other than sex.
Is this some really warped kind of bisexuality? Liking one sex for their beauty and bodies, but liking another for the way they think? I've always heard bisexuality is ONLY having "sexual attraction for both sexes" but in my case, that's different, because I'm not "sexually" attracted to both. So I don't even know how to define what I am but bisexual is the closest word I can come up with.
Furthurmore, is this confused way of thinking even normal?
Please hear me out.
I'm a young male adult who has for all his life been sexually attracted to females. I think they're absolutely beautiful and are true works of nature's art.
But that's just my sexual attraction. Because they've always either ignored me or treated me poorly. The same girls I thought were pretty were the ones making fun of me in school and laughing at me and everthing. Not only that but I've found them to be very hard to talk to in general. It's so hard for me to open up to a girl, and the whole thought of doing so is just scary. I like them physically and for the sexual attraction, but past that I lose interest fast.
However, with guys it's a different thing. Aside from maybe 2 girls I know, all my friends have been male. I find them much easier to talk to and much more accepting of me as a person. They're not as mean or hurtful as what girls have been to me.
I've found myself really really attracted to several of my guy friends because of this. I can never open up to a girl, so opening up to my male friends is my only alternative. And that closeness gives me an attraction. But not sexual.
See that is my problem that I don't understand.
With females, I really don't like the way they think, how they act and treat me, etc. But they are appealling sexually, and I really really want to have sex with one (I'm still a virgin). So whereas I'm attracted to them physically and would really enjoy having sex, I don't think I'm mentally or socially compatable with one. And with males, it's the opposite. The male body does nothing for me in the way of getting me sexually aroused or excited (the male body is actually a turn off) but as for opening up and making a deep loving connection, I find myself able to do this.
So basically I'm really confused. On one end I'm heavily attracted physically and sexually, but very repelled mentally and socially. And on the other end, I'm heavily attracted mentally and socially, but very repelled physically and sexually.
It's so hard for me to even gather myself. Because if I ever get in a relationship with a guy, there will be no sex because I'm not attracted like that and the idea disgusts me. But if I get into one with a female, there will likely be no real connection there other than sex.
Is this some really warped kind of bisexuality? Liking one sex for their beauty and bodies, but liking another for the way they think? I've always heard bisexuality is ONLY having "sexual attraction for both sexes" but in my case, that's different, because I'm not "sexually" attracted to both. So I don't even know how to define what I am but bisexual is the closest word I can come up with.
Furthurmore, is this confused way of thinking even normal?
Do you think it's normal?
Does this story fit one of these flags? If so, click it!
[Best Of] [Funny] [Interesting] [Weird][Lame] [Off Topic] [Innapropriate]
Check out these other IIN stories:
Oh, and remember: Relationships don't have to involve sex if you don't want them to.
Oh, and buddy, youre straight. It's called Se'xual Orientation because its determined by which gender you're SE'XUALLY attracted to. I think the best thing for you is to keep all your guy friends and just find a good girl to start a relationship with.
Were you brought up in a family where your parents never talked about sex to you, and/or where they were kind of strict? That is how I grew up.
When I am playing sports or being busy, I don't think about this fear. Also, hearing about all of the gay stuff in the news makes this worse. Also, I want to have kids when I grow up, not adopt kids, but have a wife to produce them, and I want the lifestyle of the American man: Football, beer, grilling, sports, rock, it's all in my blood.
Maybe you might try this (at a bar if you arent in a frat):
When I get drunk at the frat house, I am 100% more talkative to girls and don't fear them a lot, and when I get into a small convo with one I just look her up and down and want to bone the shit out of her.
You need to do some major dating. There are plenty of women that are tomboys yet look really hot. In my opinion, that's who you should date, and you'll be the happiest guy on the planet with great sex and good company.
Also, it's best you forget about all this sexual identity nonsense. America is obsessed with homosexuality, don't buy into it either by becoming homophobic or by thinking you have to lead a gay lifestyle just because you had a few same sex attractions. Just be who you are and find someone you can love and who will love you back, and who you find attractive.
BTW, girls get cooler and cooler as they get older, they get less hung up on being girly, so get out there and start dating, it only gets better, and women will only become more beautiful as you get older. So get out there, and don't worry so much about if they will love you. Just go and find one you like.
girls are mean and they lie and cheat and use you
guys tend not to
they can tho so be careful
you might be bi
if so, that's awesome, being bi is perfectly okay
if you're a hater, please jump in front of a moving bus and push your kids there too so the gene pool remains pure
bi and gay are both okay
so is straight, but straight ppl can be haters
the ones who aren't, thank you