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Am I crazy?
29% Normal
13 Comments

Nobody notices or anything but I don't ever really feel normal anymore. I feel weird and different (*unexplainable). Sometimes not very intensely but sometimes pretty intensely. And every once in awhile I have an episode where it's extremely intense. People try and talk to me and their words don't make sense. I'm unresponsive because it doesn't make sense. I'm very embarresed about how I'm acting and I think everyone can read it in my eyes how I feel, and I feel like people can read my brain. And then.. the scariest part is, somebody will say something and be completely NOT talking to me at all.. for instance "I understand what's going on here" and I get a flush of fear and anxiety and everything gets a lot worse feeling because I start thinking stuff like "You do? You do understand whats going on here? How do you know?" and I start freaking out. It hurts really bad too. It hurts to smile. I get really apathetic and sad. And feel very very guilty for not being happy for the people around me and feel guilty because I feel like they think it's their fault.
My friend asked me "Are you having anxiety?" and I got embarresed and scared and said "no".. then later I asked him why he said that and he said he didnt remember asking me that at all.
And there's nothing I can do to stop any of this.
Do you think it's normal?
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Comments (13)
bazookatruth (13103)
2008-01-28 00:00:56
The only time I've ever felt remotely close to what you're describing I was around people I didn't really know smoking high grade weed. I don't know, but it sounds like you have anxiety issues.
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emicake (13131)
2008-01-29 00:58:02
I cant smoke weed anymore because of it, because it gets 100x worse when i'm high. >_< yeah something like that..
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bazookatruth (13103)
2008-01-29 15:51:48
@: emicake
You should probably seek professional help. What you describe sounds exactly what my sister was going through in high school and she was really bad to the point she wouldn't hardly leave the house. My parents finally got her to a therapist who got her on some meds and she leads a normal life now. The only problem I can see with her is she's hooked on these meds, but if it works then what the hey.
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emicake (13131)
2008-02-01 02:16:45
Do you know what shes taking?
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secretme (18490)
2008-12-13 20:01:17
Therapy. ;)
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lurvejazz (19190)
2009-01-06 00:28:47
You should really go to a psychologist...
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somethingrecognizeable (18131)
2009-03-14 05:54:37
it sounds like you have quite bad anxiety resulting in episodes of derealization and depersonalization! that unexplainable feeling of feeling out of the loop, and being unable to translate the things around you as reality? I suggest you go the doctors for anxiety and try and explain the *unexplainable feelings of weirdness that you are experiencing as a result, they can then suggest what therapies or medicines might be beneficial?
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roadrunnerxo (21317)
2009-04-26 14:21:45
I feel like that too. I kind of feel like everyone else is on a totally different planet and sometimes I feel like I'm throwing everything off. I also feel bad sometimes when I seem not to care because I think it doesnt show on my face. But I'm learning now to just be myself, pay no mind to what other people think about you, it's hard I know, I've been there, but if you take it step by step, eventually you'll start to feel better and those feelings will go away. People will love you for who you are!If you don't feel sorry, you dont have to if its not there, it's not there. Like they say "You can't fight the tears that ain't comin." I still cry sometimes when I come home after being around a lot of people because I feel that embarrassment and feel like I've done something wrong, but I know I havent, I just have to learn to be completely free and natural. There is something you can do though sweetheart, dont be afraid to be yourself. The only things that matter and are true, is things that are truly "natural." just let go.
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alexlong (24061)
2009-06-10 17:00:02
yeah i know exactly what you mean
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FlowerOfHope (27744)
2009-08-28 15:03:53
Do you use drugs?
If not: you should see a psychiatrist.
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emicake (13131)
2009-09-01 22:24:22
Sooo... I don't know how long it's been but it's been atleast a year anddd! Just an update, I am feeling a lot better now. (: A LOT. I still dont feel completely, right. But, I have learned to deal with it and learned to just go with the flow.. I guess what I'm saying is I learned to like myself, and learned to go with the flow.. And yeah, I dont feel crazy anymore but I know that I did. Soo glad it's over, haha.
Still can't smoke weed, because it comes back.

Yep yep.
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dimadog1 (28484)
2009-09-14 06:36:00
Gothic
Emo
some other sh!t maybe
still its awesome being emo
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applescruffs (28944)
2009-09-25 13:54:38
maybe you have anxiety problems. My friend had something like that, but now she takes pills that calm her down. And dont listen to the douches up there, Your not emo. You just want someone to understand.
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