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Bad dreams
67% Normal
7 Comments

Last spring my Dad had a major stroke at his brainstem that landed him in the hospital. He was in a coma for 60 days and deteriorated with no movement or awareness- he was breathing on own but barely. This happened right after schiavo was in the news- but we never spoke about it. I found out from Mom that Dad had given me medical Power of attorney- His living will said no life support whatsoever. The experts said his condition was worse than Schiavo. I then had them remove the feeding tubes to spare mother more pain.
For five days he withered away with no change- on sixth day he moved his head, looked up his eyes slowly moved and he stared at me. I had hospital give him a sedative and he went back to sleep. He died that night.

I see him staring at me every night in my dreams. It does not wake me up anymore-but the dream comes every night.

I think I would have has closure had I spoken to him in person of his intentions rather than find out whilst he was comatose.

My Mom is doing fine, although she also really misses Dad.

I am hoping thinking of Mom being OK will bring me closure.
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Comments (7)
citizenpremier (159)
2006-03-10 20:25:42
Closure is a lie perpetrated by hollywood. You'll never stop being bothered by your father's death, you'll just become less bothered as time goes by. And then some days you'll feel as if your father had died yesterday, while other times you may go months without thinking of him.

But it'll probably make you feel better if you realize that your father was dead after his stroke. You're lucky (and so is he) that you don't have a family that forced you to keep him alive, so that you would have to watch him deteriorate slowly.
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Anonymous
2006-03-12 20:07:21
My dad had a heart attack and died right underneath my hands as I gave him CPR. I still have dreams about it...and it's been over a year.
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greggbarridallas (1481)
2006-03-14 07:45:21
damn!!! thats all I can say. No bull dude, i'm sorry bro!!!
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3ll3ira (3623)
2006-09-06 00:35:33
why is this inthe sex section???
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cabinet69 (3089)
2006-09-06 00:52:37
It is better not to see people in the end sometimes you will have bad memories for a few years they will slowly subside and you will remember the good times
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CrazyMoFo (1953)
2006-09-06 06:47:32
Ok usually I say some stupid nasty sh*t, but not this time. It seems like the fact that u had to make the decision over ur fathers life is haunting u. Dont allow it to. All that matters is if he loved u and ur mother ? I'm sure he did, all parents love their kids, and he did want u in charge of his medical Power of attorney. So don't hold onto his death, let it go. In ur next dream, wen u see ur dad, say goodbye.
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Intel (3638)
2006-09-07 00:31:41
oh god please i will skip this section i have enough problems as it is, just know its not ur fault, thinking about this does not make u better it jst makes u more worried about things u know ur dad will never mind!
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