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Getting divorced and cannot stop second guessing myself
I left my wife and filed for divorce because I was in the marriage all by myself and because our house is about to foreclose and she does not want to sell it or get a job (we had two incomes when we bought it). But I am a Christian and divorce is not part of my ideals. I had infidelity problems six years ago and have spent every moment since trying to make up for it. My wife, simply put, hates me. The only purpose in life she has left is to get revenge. I feel so conflicted about getting a divorce that I cannot concentrate at work, and that is why I am typing this message. Why do I feel like I can put everything back together if I just try something different! I can't stop thinking that I must solve the problem. Is that normal?
Do you think it's normal?
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Comments (3)
one_green (29593)
Have the two of you thought of trying counseling together? It might be a thought if you are so conflicted about divorce. You might also find out more about how she really feels...if she wants to make it work or if she really does hate you. Then you could go through with the divorce if counseling doesn't work, you know?
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noahcownt (30458)
@: one_green
Been through two years of counseling together. She likes to have free reign at telling me how bad a person I am, but she doesn't like receiving counsel. She is afraid to risk anything by loving me. She feels all of her troubles are my fault and therefore I must be made to suffer, but my suffering is not accomplishing her healing. I respond to counseling a lot better when I have the opportunity to receive good advice, which means I have to go alone, which I have been doing for years. I know that she will not change. So I am the one who has to decide what the future will be like.
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one_green (29593)
@: noahcownt
If you readily see that she will never change, then I guess it comes down to whether you can stand to be married to her the way she is and will always be.....or is it time to move on? At the risk of sounding trite....we only have one chance at life, you know.
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