How often do you pay for your girlfriend?

30% Normal

27 Comments

It certainly is unfair for you, well you have to pay for her from time to time but not like you, im sorry to say it but it seems your girlfriend is kind of "using" you in a certain way, if this continues just tell her that you cant afford it!

I agree I think she is using you tell her to go get a job or get another boyfriend. LOL.

It's not normal. Adult women (that are worth it anyway) no longer expect their boyfriends/husbands to pay for absolutely everything. Usually, if a guy has the disposable income to pay for dinners, dates, vacations, etc., without putting a strain on his finances, then by all means he should! What's disturbing about this girl is that you've explained your financial situation to her and she doesn't care. Anyway I can't believe you actually had to tell her! It doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that a college student can't pay for dinners out several times a week for 2 people! She's using you. Any decent girl in her position would have been more thoughtful. There's so many ways to eat and have fun together without spending an arm and a leg - like having picnics and playing games. Why can't she cook for the both of you once in a while? She'd be pulling her weight and it's a hell of a lot cheaper. Good luck but you have to lose that one...

From a girls point of view I think you shouldn't pay all the time. If my boyfriend takes me out it's nice if he pays, it shows concederation. I care about him so I show it by paying for myself on most occasions or paying some of the bill in restuarants and stuff like that.

If you are always paying and she doesn't seem too bothered she's probly using you for your money or taking advantage of you because you let her. You should explain to her that you haven't got enough money for everything and if she cared she would accept that.

My personal opinion is that relationships are 100/100. So the way that my wife and I do it is that I will pay for an outing and she will catch the next one and we switch back and forth like that to keep things fair. I do not see why women should be held at a higher class than men, we are all humans. The only difference I could see a guy doing more and the woman doing less is if she's pregnant, that is their pampering time, otherwise it needs to be FAIR.

Also, you are both in the SAME position (going to college) so I don't see why it can't be fair. You aren't married either and don't have kids together so you don't have the responsibility to provide for her.

start making sandwiches and eat in your dorm

D) Not enough information. However, be cautious for any signs of gold-digger-ship.

I'm a girl and I pay for about 80% of all our food. He's kind of poor, but he buys weed all the time... so i get kinda mad at him when he wont buy dinner...

That's not normal. I agree when you first date a girl for the first, say 3-4 times you pay.

From that on it should split in 2. In case you have about the same income. In case one has a much better income that one should pay 3:1 ratio.

Man, don't do that again, she is using you I know from my own experience. Try her sometimes and say to her that you don't have money. Let har pay and she will be either crazier about you, because you let her invest in relationship or .. I was right and she is using you and probably leave you.

I never pay my girlfriend she gives it up for free.

lol u shud be able to tell her that ur short on cash and that u shud pay for only urselves i pay for myself and my gf pays and shes fine with it

sorry dude but thats perfectly normal happens all the time.

I pay for mine all the time thats why I have a good paying job. I get all the sex I can handle so paying for her is worth it.

She's cheap.

some girls get a feeling of self esteem because the guy pays for them all the time. Unless you plan on becoming very rich this is the type of woman you want to avoid at all costs, no pun intended.

men usually earn more than their wives/girlfriends and so this is why it is still common for men to pay for women.

but you and your gf are both in college and both, i assume, have very little money. the only thing that would make sense is to more or less split things 50/50.

you didnt mention it but maybe she's really strapped for cash, even more than you are, and so she's relieved that you are paying. idk if this is the case. if not, then i stand by what i said above about 50/50.

As a female, I think that the fairest thing to do is pay when you are the one that made the plans. Let's say you want to see a movie or go out to dinner, you mention it to her- you pay. She wants to go out to a movie or dinner- she pays her own way.

If you think she just wants to spend time with you, come up with other ways to entertain her, cook her dinner, rent a romantic or funny movie for a night in(redbox is a dollar), give her a spa day with an awesome massage(you're the man as long as you keep your __ in your pants, unless you have already progressed to that stage)...

Hopefully she will understand that you just want to be thought of as her boyfriend and companion...not just a meal ticket. If she doesn't get understand, do you really want to be with someone that shallow and inconsiderate? If you are content to be in a relationship where you always give and never recieve, so be it.

You sound like a decent guy, any girl would be lucky to have someone like you..

It sounds like your girlfriend is crappy. Either she doesn't care about you, or she's just a selfish brat.

By expecting you to pay for everything in order to be with her, she makes herself a prostitute. Do you like being with prostitutes? I know I don't. If she doesn't honestly offer to pay at least 33-50% of the time, she's not worth the money you're spending on her.

Sorry dude, it is normal. The man is the provider. Don't believe me read the book "Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man: What Men Really Think About Love, Relationships, Intimacy, and Commitment" by Steve Harvey. He will say the same thing.

The thing that does concern me though is this woman's lack of support for your financial concerns. She knows you can't afford something and doesn't take that into consideration by chosing less expensive places. I mean you are both in college and being broke at that time is normal. But ask yourself do you really want that trait in a future wife -- someone who will blow all your money with no regard for a budget?? Dump her.

My boyfriend paid for me while he was in college, but the thing was, I knew what his budget was and we scaled back on costs until he graduated and got a full time job.

Screw that! Don't be passive aggressive about it. If you have been with each other a while, you should be able to tell her the truth. Next time you are put in that situation and she offers be like, "Yeah that would actually be great thanks!" Seriously. If she has respect for you, this needs to change.

You're girlfriend is materialistic..

You need to change this cause you are still not even formally committed..

My friend and her bf .. When they go out for dinner each one pays his share. Yeah he does pay for her sometimes.. But, she knows he doesn't own a Bank!!

I wasn't sure to say normal or not...it's normal for you to feel like you're being taken advantage and its not normal that she should expect you to pay for everything. You have to communicate to her your concerns....if she can't "get it" then i think you need to question if this person is right for you...you will end up paying for everything forever possibly if you don't speak up NOW. my friend gave me the best advice EVER before I got married.."start out the way you intend to continue" meaning...if you don't want to get stuck doing all the housework forever, then make sure you never do it all and insist on help...so If you aren't happy to pay all the time forever, then you need to make it clear NOW. Hope this helps.

i pay almost all the time too
but after 2 year you should be comfortable enough to just say i dont have the money you pay or were staying in
you sound unsure about your self seriously after 2 year you shouldnt be caring about seeming like a cheap skate cos sh will know your not
just get a take away and chill in with a few movies its cheaper and more romantic you can get sex after :P

It is unfair to you. I mean, guys should really pay on the first few dates, but you guys are in a serious relationship. She needs to start paying for you guys,too. If she can't pay and you can't pay then start eating sandwiches and stuff. lol. Tell her what you think.Bring it up.

can i be your girlfriend??..im not gonna let you pay that much..LOL..i believe that there should be an equal participation..and i really think your girl is insensitive and selfish!..you better tell her that so she will realize!..she is very high maintenance!...

whenever you can bro.

This is not so much normal anymore, however, some guys, myself included, have a lot of issues allowing the girl to pay for anything at all. I am a southern guy, and it's just the way I was raised. I open the doors, give her my coat when she is cold, and I pay for everything. My gf actually has issues with this, and she flat out said she is gonna pay for things too, which I don't like at all. But I do have to say this girl is simply using you, since you explained that you can't keep doing this.