I know, real beauty is on the inside and that's what matters.
But I start college in a week and people judge you for how you look first, often unconsciously, and then get to know you.
I feel ugly. So fucking ugly.
I hide in my room cause I don't want people to look at me. I can only socialize through the interwebs.
And I'm an okay person otherwise. I read a lot, can win practically any argument and make an effort to never say anything mean/hurt anyone.
This shouldn't bother me as much as it does. I should be smarter than that, you know?
But I'm not. I was staring at my face in the mirror when the tears began to fall. then before I knew it I had punched the mirror.
Is it normal to feel so disgusted with yourself? I'm a 19 year old girl and I know people, my age especially, obsess over how they look but THEY LOOK FRIKKIN PERFECT.
But I start college in a week and people judge you for how you look first, often unconsciously, and then get to know you.
I feel ugly. So fucking ugly.
I hide in my room cause I don't want people to look at me. I can only socialize through the interwebs.
And I'm an okay person otherwise. I read a lot, can win practically any argument and make an effort to never say anything mean/hurt anyone.
This shouldn't bother me as much as it does. I should be smarter than that, you know?
But I'm not. I was staring at my face in the mirror when the tears began to fall. then before I knew it I had punched the mirror.
Is it normal to feel so disgusted with yourself? I'm a 19 year old girl and I know people, my age especially, obsess over how they look but THEY LOOK FRIKKIN PERFECT.
It might help to find some focus outside yourself, something deeper than looks. Volunteer to work at a home for the elderly, for example; you'll see the worth of people who have contributed so much more to the world than a pretty face. You could also help out at your local animal shelter; animals never judge. They're just happy for a little attention.
You say that you make an effort to be kind to other people; I recommend that you try the same tactics on yourself. Find the beauty, physical or otherwise, in yourself and cherish it. Say kind things to yourself. Compliment yourself for having great style or good hair or whatever you decide is your pride and joy.
Win any argument? You're rattling my debating chains, but I'll let that slip by. ;)
It is true, so I don't see it as unhelptful. I'm not going to lie to the person, how is that helpful? Insensitive, perhaps, it still doesn't change the truth.
For example, I sometimes don't find myself attractive, that doesn't mean I'm going to lie and say "well, people are kind, they're more so for heart than appearance".
Relationship and social wise this was aimed at. I was saying, if you can't progress or do good in those ways such as looking good, being good on the inside isn't going to mean a lot to a lot of people if you don't have what's on the outside to get them interested first, so look for something that you could study and make use of your life on something you know you can do if you work hard enough.
You didn't mention you were fat or anything so add some points on the ten scale.
possibly some good news for you though. You are transitioning from high school to college? High school is not like college St all and you will see.the whole pretty girls Jocks crowd is not there anymore alot of them are nerds :-)
And I bet you look great when you smile :I
Erhm, I know this may sound weird.
But do you have any form of social network or messenger outside IIN?
Sounds like you need a confidenceboost ^^