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I feel guilty for drugging my bf
58% Normal
19 Comments

Ok, so my bf tends to get depressed a lot. i love him dearly and have been drugging the smoothies i have been making (for both him and me). it's nothing horrible, just some flax seed oil and st. john's wort, but i feel kind of guilty, because he hates pills and refuses to take them if i hand them to him (i think it's mostly out of his negative self-image and the fact that he doesn't like himself very much. he never does anything that he knows is going to be good for him).

his mood is way better since i've been doing this though. he's really happy and not snapping at the roommates. it's not like these things make you high, they just make you slightly less pissy/depressed.

should i feel guilty and is there anyone else out there doing the same thing?
Do you think it's normal?
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Comments (19)
snufflebunny (21325)
2009-04-17 07:56:48
Um, there is probably nobody else doing this. But I think that you should probably tell him and if he gets mad just say you are really sorry.
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Jim_Pfoss (19247)
2009-04-19 08:49:47
The stuff you are putting in his food is not changing his mood. It's all a psycho-somatic delusion on your part.
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djchad84 (23715)
2009-05-31 23:42:38
my brother gets really depress thoughts of suicide i cant stand his pain so i started getting anti depressants and giving them to him with out his consent i started feeling so bad even tho they were helping i eventually told him and told him why and he agreed to go see someone for his problems just try talking to him about it
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cavemanc (21884)
2009-06-01 08:33:27
you have two problems now,

A. your BF needs to talk to someone.
B. you have a communication problem with your BF
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anonymousdude (24058)
2009-06-09 23:27:47
The stuff you're putting in his food is not psychoactive in any meaningful way- If you were tipping him tabs of oxycontin or putting weed in his butter, or PCP in his weed, then it would be reprehensible.
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CodePheonixstar (24083)
2009-06-11 14:34:38
just be aware of the side effects ...
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Battle (24806)
2009-06-28 22:56:47
I say stop doing this because if he has a reaction to it or something goes wrong you will be to blame.
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Powerfrog (18386)
2009-07-14 20:11:47
Are there any side effects to these drugs? Anyway, if i were you i'd dump his depressed hump and move on.
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russellnb (23816)
2009-07-16 17:14:37
As long as it is just flax seed oil and st. john's wort do not feel bad. You are helping him and the flax seed oil and st. john's wort is only what any of us might use.
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anabolic19 (25748)
2009-07-18 20:08:31
na if it makes him feel better then go for it would you rather have him depressed and mope around?

your a good girlfriend

i'd do the same thing for my girlfriend
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sek_c_b1tch (26329)
2009-08-02 18:55:56
if he decides not to take the pills then it is his decision, entirely. you shouldn't be making it for him. quite frankly, you do not have the right. i advise you tell him that you've been putting stuff into his drinks, even if they are harmless.
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ClaireS (29414)
2009-10-05 21:12:36
Turn the tables.... you may somehow be helping him but how would you feel if you found out he was putting ruffies in your midnight snack. It's his body and you have no right to make decisions for him on that matter unless he is trying to hurt himself or has a mental disordar. You need to discuss it with him and def. tell him what you are doing and did. A lie is a lie no matter how small or goodwilled and you shouldn't have that in a relationship that means something to you.
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ClaireS (29414)
2009-10-05 21:13:49
oh and another thing.... I would have more sympothy for you if it was for his own good. But it sounds to me like your drugging your boyfriend to make YOUR life more enjoyable. Maybe he's happy being an asshole.
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AmINormal789 (30302)
2009-10-25 11:53:12
you cant keep doing this forever. tell him to get help.
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nothing2 (29013)
2009-10-26 22:34:47
they just consider that stuff food anyway
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SweetAdeline (31322)
2009-11-16 11:20:24
A lot of people secretly drug signifcant others and other family members. I used to secretly give a boyfriend 2 12-hour Sudafed (morning and night) every day to cure his sniffles, which irritated the he** out of me. He was one of those idiots who refuses to take anything. Sounds like you've come up with the proper dosage. Keep it up!
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Ollieo (19003)
2010-01-14 12:32:35
The ethics are wrong. The stuff you are giving him secretly is innocuous. But it is wrong to do it. So stop it.

Cut to the chase. If he has a problem he refuses to do anything about, and depression is something that he can do something about, then it requires commitment & work on his part.

Talk to him. If he won't act, then reassess whether you want to be in a relationship that is driving you to stoop to this behaviour.
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NickNick (34094)
2010-01-21 07:53:05
FEEL GUILTY F***ING BITCH how the hell are u doing this to him, and he doesnt even know? CAN U F***ING IMAGINE IF SOMEONES DOES THIS TO YOU!
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jellokatt (18285)
2010-02-17 02:08:29
well, i told him about it.... he didn't seem to care. he just hates the idea of taking pills. and no, i wouldn't be putting anything like prozac or actual drugs in his food.... it's all really harmless stuff.... and nicknick, if someone was secretly putting vitamins or dietary supplements in the food they were making for me, i really don't think i'd care. it's not like they're major mood altering drugs for fuck's sake... they're simple over-the-counter supplements that have no major side effects and a lot of people don't even think they do anything (well, st. john's wort CAN interfere with birth control, but he's not on that.... lol)
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