I'm 19 and am in college. I've never kissed anyone nor been on a date before. I've never drank alcohol. Am I a loser? It seems that all the pretty girls are supposed to have tons of boyfriends and go to all the drinking parties. I also just started watching rated R movies because my parents only like rated G to Pg maybe PG-13. Going out on weekends is a rare event as is going over someone's house. Consequently, I haven't had the chance to do anything. And now I feel like WHY should I do it? Does alcohol make you more "cool"? I also tend to think all guys are either just hypnotized by my attractiveness (I'm not being conceited they talk all the time) and/or want to have sex with me. So that turns me off a lot. Am I a loser b/c I'm not the typical teen/college student?
Dont worry about being a "looser" if you dont fancy it dont do it!
Drinking is the worst thing, I swear if it was just found now alcohol would be a class A drug. It causes the most deaths out of all the drug family.
My friend was 21 when she lost her virginity so dont worry about the kissing thing, you probably just havnt found anyone that deserves you yet. I would only caution you about taking risks, they can go wrong but sometimes they can go right! you only learn from mistakes so sometimes just think screw it and take a risk once in a while you never know what may come out of it!
As for the "never been kissed" thing, well, if you keep your eyes open, someday it will happen. Don't worry about it.
I respect you for not drinking at your age, but.. it's my personal choice not to drink until I'm of legal age.
My advice is to chose whether or not drinking is something you want to do or not.
But you are in no way a loser because you want guys to like you for who you are, and because you don't drink. I've met a lot of people who respect me for my choice not to, and for my choice not to jump into bed with the first guy who offers - both were a shock the first time, because they came from someone I never expected. Just, continue being yourself and you'll find someone you can share everything with.
I've done the whole partying, drinking, blah blah, but I've found that after it all, sure it was a good time, but it's just a phase and true friends are hard to find. I used to be the man in high school, not to be coneceited either, but I had the girlfriend, broke up became the bacehlor throwing the best parties at my house, and had a huge top friends on myspace, because of course those were the people in my circle. Then I came to college, I tried to get that going again my first year but when I came back my second year I've felt so isolated, and I've become...well you. and I don't mean loser, i mean everything you've described, and i don't consider that being a loser. That's called maturity. Do you have any hobbies you enjoy? I've isolated myself on purpose and am working on a theory, finished an album, wrote a book, and am finishing up a movie script. I've done a lot with my time instead of wasting it bullshitting with people that are only in your life to use you because they're bored...i suggest going out and trying it, but trust me you're not missing too much/will get over that shit real quick. The best times in my life were with those people, so I can't compeltely say it was bad, just sad to know how much can change in just a year and what you "want" changes. Let me know if this helped kid and please cheer up, you're so priviliged. There's people that don't have food, water, shoes, in other countries, there's bums in the streets iwth no lives. like, just be happy you have your health, beauty, and youth. some guy will come along and make you feel worth the great amount you are worth. I swear, a good girl like you doesn't come along everyday and if you were at my University I would smother you with flowers, hugs, and love! lol not to sound over dramatic, but i just mean i wish there were more girls liek you because it's all turned into lust, that's what this world is now and it's sad. you can't find love, and it's all about status, being better than the next man what not. be happy, things will look up and when you're 21 hit the bars, you'll meet dudes but make sure they're down for your heart not just your pussy
My experience is parallel to yours and i am now 23 and in a great relationship with a guy for the past 3 years. I am really shy and also a person that is considered very attractive so the combination of the two led to a miserable existence in my teen years. I have the same hobbies as you do and i'm in my last year in college. Also i had my first kiss at 21 and i still don't drink, i now have a quality circle of friends.
My point is that you need to realise that your attributes are what makes you you and quite frankly to me you sound great. Confidence is what you lack but lucky for you confidence is easy to gain.
Try make up convos in your head and thnk of what you would say and what you think the other person's response would be. Think about the response objectively and you would realise that your fears are irrational and that they are all what you think and not what others think. I know this is difficult just take it one step at a time.
Just remeber great girls like you are rare these days so who you choose to be with is your choice no one else's take your time and be selective because at the end of the day only you know whats best for you, not your friends.
Hope i helped;)
but be honest or the sitiuation might get worse
You can always try to draw or imagine the perfect guy. There are a lot of people in the world and you are only 19 years old, the ways of god are incalculable.
Another problem could be that you simply like girls or guys who are different (shy) ...
I think things get worse as i write about it. Whatever. I'm just gonna go about my life avoiding ppl-it's worked so far.
I have never been drunk either, why should young people rely on a liver and brain damaging substance to have a good time? They are the losers if alchol is the only way to have fun.
Are you happy? If you are then that is all that matters, in 10 years time when you have your perfect hubbie and life, they would be the ones waiting for liver transplants, so whoede better off in the long term run??
Its sooo you