I will hate you... no matter how good of friends we used to be.

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If you can call SELFISHNESS a mental disorder, then that's what your problem is. You're selfish, you think the entire world is about you & you have a problem w/ treating others the opposite way of which you were treated. So what if you didn't get a "happy birthday"? Why does that mean you can't be the courteous, bigger guy here & wish others a "happy birthday"? It sounds like you have some major growing up to do.

Yes, maybe it is selfishness. The birthday thing is not really that big of a deal to me, I was just using that as a small example.

But instead of telling someone what their problems are, why not point out some way to overcome the problem. In a way, withholding advice is also a very selfish act, especially when it's obvious that somebody needs it. So aren't you being selfish by pointing out my problems, but not having the decency to offer advice?

Let me know if you really believe such a thing can be given advice & then I'll give you advice. Also, selfish or not, it doesn't matter because we don't know each other.

I can't tell you why your family gives your sibling everything on a silver platter, but I can say that you should be glad it's her and not you. When a person is handed everything, they don't develop strong character or independence, and they become weak and pathetic. Almost all of the people that got their opportunities handed to them never used those opportunities to their full advantage and ended up leeching off their parents and the government and will probably do so for the rest of their life. Permanent dependents. They're not doing your sibling any favors by doing everything for her. They have obviously taught your sibling that if she needs something, just come to mommy and daddy with her hand out. Your sister is screwed up and you're not. Be happy about what you've achieved on your own. Don't hate your sister as she is only doing what her parents have taught her. Parents are not perfect and sometimes they are very wrong about how they deal with their children. Perhaps they had always felt you were the strong one and didn't need all the hand outs. Based on what you've described, your sister had no structure and no discipline. If you want your sister to crash and burn, no worries...she's well on her way if the same thing keeps happening. As far as what you could do, first lose your hate. It hurts you more than it hurts anyone else. Also, it helps to be in a positive state of mind when searching for solutions. People can tell if you're harboring negative feelings for them and they will be less receptive to what you have to say. Try talking to your parents to see exactly why they treat your sister like that. Maybe you could convince your family to go into family therapy together. Even though I do believe that parents should be responsible for paying for their children's college tuition, they are not legally responsible so all you can do is ask for their assistance. The pell grant system operates on the assumption that your parents are more than willing to cough up the dough if they can. Because of that assumption they use your parent's income as part of the threshold if you are under a certain age. I believe it's 24, but I'm not sure. I don't know how old you are, but you may need to wait until you can file as an independent. As far as your friend not being available as much as you would like, all I can say is that's life. I wish there was a simple solution to something like that, but unfortunately there's not. You may have to accept that your friend won't be spending as much time with you as he was before especially when the relationship he's having is new. Give it some time and then suggest doing something together for a day or so. You can also try making new friends as well. Life can be terribly difficult at times and I can certainly understand and relate to some of what you're experiencing. Remember, you can't change or control other people, only yourself. The good news is we have control over our own lives and we can change ourselves. Lead by example and take care of yourself before trying to help others with their problems. The bottom line is to get rid of the hate; it just makes you hard to deal with and makes it hard for you to find solutions. Good luck :)