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Is it normal that break-up songs make me feel real...

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I imagine you must care for her a lot, plus you're insecure. Honestly though, if it makes her feel important, it doesn't matter how you express your love.
Although if she's not comfortable with it, you may want to find another way to express yourself.
As for insecurity, you just have to work at it. Remind yourself that nothing is currently falling apart.
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