Whenever my wife says something romantic, i drop trousers, scratch my balls, and sing:
Vuntz I had a kendy store
Bizniss vas so bad
I asked mein vife vat to do
And dis is vat she said:
Take yourself some kerosene
Pour it on de floor
Take a match
Give a scratch
No more kendy store.
She pretends to be very annoyed and disgusted but I know that, beneath her retching and rejections, there is a burst of love and admiration for me.
Vuntz I had a kendy store
Bizniss vas so bad
I asked mein vife vat to do
And dis is vat she said:
Take yourself some kerosene
Pour it on de floor
Take a match
Give a scratch
No more kendy store.
She pretends to be very annoyed and disgusted but I know that, beneath her retching and rejections, there is a burst of love and admiration for me.
The judge first asked if he could get the witness to say their name, and the guy said (in a strong German accent), "Vot iss your name?"
Got charged with contempt of court and fined. Damn shame.
The one i hate most is "i've had an idea" that means she has got past the thinking stage.
The one that pisses me off the most is, "I haven't seen it" "I never touched it" but it ends up in her handbag!!
When a woman says that i lol to myself and think "bullshit"