Ok. In frequent times, when I see someone that "met my criteria" to die, I always think about how is their death.
For example : I think A is "fit", so I fantasized that A had fallen in stairs, fallen from several stories, and some deaths I like to imagine about.
Beside deaths, I also think some scenarios how is their death, like first A was in a bathroom and slipped and broke his/her neck or something like that. I know you know what am I talking about don't you.
Not only just 1 person, because there are many people who I know, is "match". Sometimes I shared about my thoughts to the others, and they got disgusted, and I'm still... smiling of pleasure.
And when I meet them, I just think about their deaths, which makes me feel something "weird" emotionally. Like, I want to grab their neck, and that's it.
I aware that those things are "resistors" to socialize with that people, since I'm afraid that "my thoughts" will be true. What if I really make them die, even I'd love to?
Oh yes. I always thought that If my "victims" were dead in front of me -Let's just say A had his/her neck broken- I would take my camera, took a picture of them (many), and then asked for help. So I can remember their REAL deaths and make an album of it.
Since the real death is only occurred once, that's why I only think about them. Well I hope that I have a lucid dream, killing people, organized them how is their death, position of the body and something like that. And more than once, so I can remember them.
Feared sentence : Necrophilia, also called thanatophilia or necrolagnia, is the sexual attraction to corpses. (I only love the way they die... But what if my mind were gone too far?! Well since I'd love to "position them" when they're "unmovable" + got some photos.)
I hope I can stop my mind BEFORE I got really lost (at least got my limit.
-I guessed I'm not normal... Solutions?
For example : I think A is "fit", so I fantasized that A had fallen in stairs, fallen from several stories, and some deaths I like to imagine about.
Beside deaths, I also think some scenarios how is their death, like first A was in a bathroom and slipped and broke his/her neck or something like that. I know you know what am I talking about don't you.
Not only just 1 person, because there are many people who I know, is "match". Sometimes I shared about my thoughts to the others, and they got disgusted, and I'm still... smiling of pleasure.
And when I meet them, I just think about their deaths, which makes me feel something "weird" emotionally. Like, I want to grab their neck, and that's it.
I aware that those things are "resistors" to socialize with that people, since I'm afraid that "my thoughts" will be true. What if I really make them die, even I'd love to?
Oh yes. I always thought that If my "victims" were dead in front of me -Let's just say A had his/her neck broken- I would take my camera, took a picture of them (many), and then asked for help. So I can remember their REAL deaths and make an album of it.
Since the real death is only occurred once, that's why I only think about them. Well I hope that I have a lucid dream, killing people, organized them how is their death, position of the body and something like that. And more than once, so I can remember them.
Feared sentence : Necrophilia, also called thanatophilia or necrolagnia, is the sexual attraction to corpses. (I only love the way they die... But what if my mind were gone too far?! Well since I'd love to "position them" when they're "unmovable" + got some photos.)
I hope I can stop my mind BEFORE I got really lost (at least got my limit.
-I guessed I'm not normal... Solutions?
Socialy Acceptible-No
Look, they're just fun thoughts and as long as it doesn't manafest into somthing more you're fine.