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Is it normal to be a special little liberal snowflake crybaby?
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I am a liberal, mainly because i believe that i really am a omnisexual trigendered narwhal, but most sane cis white men want to question my ethnicity which really triggers me and i really think they need to check their privilege, also I really hate trump and i am mad that he won because that means we won't have any nuclear warefare with russia, there will not be any FEMA camps, and I have to pay less tax as a result all because hillary lost the election and that makes me really butthurt WAAAAAAA I WANT TO BE STUCK IN A FEMA CAMP RIGHT NOW!!!
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Comments (16)
Nice strawman. It'd be like if I said:

"I'm a Republican, because I cry like a little bitch if anyone says anything mean about daddy trump, black people should be our slaves again and fags need to go to hell! I blame Obama for our country's problems even though it was the Senate and Congress keeping him from doing anything! Say anything about equal rights, and you must be an SJW man-hating bigot! Wah! I need my shotgun to cuddle and to blast some holes in those fucking vegans!"

That's how stupid you look right now.
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Mhg8792
The fact that you're falsely accusing me of being a trump supporting republican redneck with a shotgun all because you assumed so makes you look even more stupid because i hate both SJWs and republicans i think they're both crooks, what? Are you going to assume that im angry because you do not understand whether i can say what i just said calmly or not
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@: Mhg8792
I wasn't falsely accusing you of anything. I was doing the same as you did, but in the reversed. Using the most extreme, bottom of the barrel examples of a particular group and pretending to be part of that to make a mockery.
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Mhg8792
and then you said "That's how stupid you look right now" thus falsely accusing me of being one
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How incredibly droll.
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I guess that's better than being someone who voted for change only to watch Trump fill his cabinet positions with people actually convicted of intentionally removing and retaining classified information, or former Goldman Sach's employees, or even the wife of the Senate majority leader. Cause if I did that I'd be feeling really stupid right now especially if I thought his reason for running was anything but to further his and his family's business interests.
Then I'd be all "But, but...he said he was going to drain the swamp. I didn't think he'd restock it with his own brand of pond scum."
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The SJW is the hippie of our era, except they don't even have the virtue of questioning authority. Sad!
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@: felixy
They want to wussify the world!
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Nice trolling.
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Mhg8792
Thanks :)
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I like the idea. Here's my take on it.

Left side: All of these uneducated republicans keep making this country so racist and hateful. I think that Trump is a racist for wanting to build a wall to keep out illegals even though there is no way in hell I would house any of those people or pay for their shit. I don't want to deal with them at all. I just want the government to take care of them and put them somewhere where I can't see them. While I'm sitting here in LA, some mexican will be in Yuma harvesting crops for 3 bucks an hour. Making a better life, right? In fact, if an illegal came to my doorstep and asked me for things, they would be invading my safe space and probably would also be sexually harassing me by looking at me. What a creep!

I think that rich people are the problem in this country... those evil scummy human beings. I think that it's only fair if they pay 60% or more of their income to the government, even though I probably work for a company that was started by a rich person and rich people basically pay my salary. But that's not enough for me, I want them to also pay more for my healthcare, give me free food, pay for my school... and more! I want all this, even though I realize that all the money from the richest people put together wouldn't be enough to pay for any of those things.

I think that in order to make up for slavery that no white people alive today took part in, we should make sure we give extra benefits to minorities to show them that we view them as equals. We should give them more things because they obviously can't do anything on their own. Those poor souls.

We should also make sure that we tell women they can overcome the oppression from the white man. Even though domestic violence is probably higher in black and hispanic groups, it's obviously the rich white man that has been bringing women down... like Trump! Women who make less per year because they help raise children or choose different careers are obviously being discriminated against. There is no way a sane woman would actually want to devote a lot of her time to being a good mom or would ACTUALLY want to take on a terrible career like being a teacher or hairstylist. No way! Women don't shoot that low anymore, do they?!

Right side: I am really just a pretty selfish person, but I try to justify my opinions with incredibly biased statistics and try to dismiss social issues! I also won't let you get a single word in during an argument. I will also compare issues, such as gun violence, to totally irrelevant topics such as water quality. "Oh you know... water kills people every year, does that mean we should ban water?".

I also completely dismiss scientific claims. Global warming? What a hoax. It's all so that they could make a few million on that documentary about global warming with Al Gore. Climate change? Bullshit! There is absolutely nothing wrong with a giant cloud of gray fumes hanging over big cities! It's just the natural cycle of the Earth! There's nothing wrong with kids getting asthma at an increasing rate in urban areas. It's totally natural!

All these liberal pussies want to take my guns away. And no matter what they say, I'm convinced that everyone wants to take my stuff away. Even if they specifically say they don't.

I also think that what's the harm in an occasional racist cop shooting a black guy? It's not ALL cops. Just a few! Not a big deal. I don't get why they have to care so much! geez! I wish black people would just deal with the fact that they're gonna get pulled over more even if they didn't do anything. calm down! Yeah, there's like a 2% chance they might get violent with you just because you're black... but that's nothing!

I think that even though I'm a male, who doesn't have a uterus and have never had to devote 9 months of my life growing a human being in my stomach, I should get to tell women that they can't have a medical procedure! Those awful human beings! Who would kill a baby like that? You did it to yourself! He raped you because you dressed like a slut. Deal with it!
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Although I don't necessarily agree with everything you said, I think this is one the more objective posts regarding these sort of issues. I really appreciate that you point out the hypocrisy on both sides. I think this post, and others like it that aim to depict issues in a more objective fashion by devoting relatively equal space to both sides are rare gems.
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Mhg8792
good point
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@: Mhg8792
Thanks.
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Objective...coming from someone who wishes death on people who are just doing their job...
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KekReptilian
Carbon fibers are sexist!!!! A feminist academic wrote an article claiming exactly that.
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