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Is it normal to be a virgin at 40 and now scared to have sex?
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49% Normal
37 Comments

Okay, I started life believing you should save yourself for marriage but when I wasn't married by 30 I thought being in love would be enough. I dated a guy for 6 months and thought "I will sleep with him in 3 months if the relationship continues." Needless to say, I found out he was dating multiple women at the same time. I'm glad I didn't sleep with him but now I'm 40 and still a virgin. I've been spending a lot of time with a friend and am very attracted to him. Should I tell him now that I'm a virgin or wait? He's a very sexual person and the thought of telling him terrifies me. I know he has no idea that I am a virgin. I'm not a prude, enjoy masturbation but the actual act terrifies me because I've waited so long.
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Comments (37)
But, you definitely need to make sure he's the right one. I mean, you've already waited 40 years for the right one, if he's not the right one then you couldve just had it 20 plus years ago
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Is'nt that a movie?
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I'm not sure j would say being a virgin at 40 is normal but I don't think it's bad! I wouldn't tell him since it might put him off but it's up to you
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You shouldn't be scared to tell someone, i think it's great you have waited and when you find someone who is special enough to earn that from you he shouldn't care whether you are or not. And it's not something you need to tell him upfront it's not like a disability that will effect anything :)
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the ball is in your field..no pun intended...
this guy would be pleased that you're a virgin,however it might be scary to him at first simply cause a 40 year old virgin is pretty much only a movie at this time and otherwise pretty much the fantasy of most middle eastern terrorists/.

i'd say just tell him but ONLY when you're pretty sure that sex is about to happen soon.or if the subject of sex comes up for some reason in future conversation..take care and do not be afraid to have sex..but fo god sake please use protection if u don't plan for pregnancy..and by protection i don't mean carry a 38 caliber to bed/.
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It was a stupid idea glorifying sex to begin with.

Just have sex with that guy or with a hooker.
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Just do it before you can't have fun anymore. Save it for what??? Sex isn't all that great lol. It's not bad either but to put your life on hold for Mr Right is a waste of time in my opinion.
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Do not feel ashamed to be a virgin. You are actually lucky to be a virgin. I know this sounds crazy but did you know that every time you have sex with someone the interaction between the two people causes an exchange of energy between the two of you and you both end up receiving each others karma. This is very real and very true. Don't you see those people that go around screwing everything they can possibly screw and not know who they even are as a person, they are lost and depressed. If I were you I would continue to save myself for someone who at least does not sleep around with so many people. But you can do what you want. =0)
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i dont get why some people wait so long and why so many religions put sex down, i love women they're so sexy,they're bodies are a work of art its beautiful, i love nudity and i grew up my whole life going to nude beaches and stuff but thats because my family and they're friends are comfortible with it, my family is from Germany, many people in europe are comfortible with nudity because its in alot of their culture and history, they have many nude beaches and parks
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vansshoes
Dust off the cobwebs and tell your freind to dive in.
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Ollieo
If you do not feel comfortable with this guy then don't do it. Virginity isn't an affliction to be gotten rid of. It just means you haven't found a guy with whom you can feel that intimate.

I think you may want to consider counselling to take a closer look at why you are not attracting the right guy for you.
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Virginity is an affliction well in your case it is. if your scared that means that it definitely means something to you, and you obviously have a libido if you enjoy masturbation. You don't have to do any work as your a female so its not as if it will show that your inexperienced. you obviously want to do this, its far from normal. its a fallacy that love and sex are that closely related. just do it, you know you want to, face the fear!
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dog
It's fine don't worry. And you should tell him because you might get close
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i seriously wish i were you! just imagine how mind blowing your first tymwill be shit! all i can say is have fun but dnt over do it! lol
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All I can say is that it's going to hurt, especially since you're old. Good luck. You'll need it. *Pats shoulder.*
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farting12girl
hahahah im a 34 year old virgin im dirt poor and cant buy myself a dildo so i use my fingers im attractive but still cant get laid i know now that im goint to be a virgin for the rest of my life cause i fart all the time i had couples ask me to do a threesome but that s not goint to happen i never even kissed a guy before hahahahha and im 34 technically 33 not till august i like this one guy but nothings happended in a year so i just masturbate alot and for get it your never going to get laid sorry
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I want to congratulate you on waiting, it is God's will that we wait until marriage. I'm not sure if your Christian, but having sex before marriage is a SIN. It is a sin against your own body. I decided to wait over 10 years ago and I will continue to wait.

1 Corinthians 6:18-20 & 1 Corinthians 7:1-2

"Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body. What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's. Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband."

Jesus is the Answer! If your not saved He wants you to be. God Bless You & Yours in Jesus Mighty Name!
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oh my gosh haha YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOUR MISSING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

YOU NEED TO HAVE SEX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
JUST DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Forget it woman mostofus don't need men
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I want to congratulate you on waiting, it is God's will that we wait until marriage. I'm not sure if your Christian, but having sex before marriage is a SIN. It is a sin against your own body. I decided to wait over 10 years ago and I will continue to wait.

1 Corinthians 6:18-20 & 1 Corinthians 7:1-2

"Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body. What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's. Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband."

Jesus is the Answer! If your not saved He wants you to be. God Bless You & Yours in Jesus Mighty Name!
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They made a comedy movie about it, intended to make people laugh, so no, it's not normal. But that doesn't mean you will never have sex, just find someone and do it.
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Here is the thing. If this guy is going to have a hang up over you being a virgin, and your virginity is more of a turn off to him than you being a turn on is, then he ISN'T Mr Right, and he damn sure isn't soulmate material, and you are better off without him anyway.
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By the way that guy will be more than happy to de-flower you
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Naw, tell him-gently. But let him know you're willing to let him 'begin training' you to be just like a 40yr old woman should be-hot!
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Carpe dium sister - you need to get on that. Sorry to say it, but your chances of finding someone to be with who doesn't want sex pretty much straight away nowadays are slim to none.

You are missing out on what is one of life's greatest pleasures too - both physically and emotionally.

Don't tell the guy - it's too much pressure. He won't notice at all.

And don't get all crying and 'you took my virginity' afterwards it'll spin him out.
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You have genophobia? :D
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kwakwakwakwakwa! i'm glad to have met a virgin in my life!!!! lmfao
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No, it's not normal
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Give me a call, I can help you with that problem
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i AM AVAILABLE FOR SEXUAL INSTRUCTIONS I PROMICE TO BE GENTLE AND UNDERSTANING I AM WILLING TO TRAVEL 500 MILES
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Dr.Comet69
OMG, are you that 40 year old virgin dude from that movie 'The 40 Year Old Virgin'
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You did a wrong thing but now you can change.Have sex.there is nothing to be afraid of
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Because
haha, maybe you should meet Andy Stitzer.
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Your 40!!!!!!!! Guys will maybe wait if your in your 20's and a virgin but not at 40. Give it up or become a cat lady your choice.
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leesa=]
LOL this is quite funny im still a virgin but yet again im only 15 :L lol:) a 40 yr old virgin wow life well spent (not) most of my mates lost it at 13 and stuff <-- slags lol :]

dont worry though as people say get laid before your an oap L:
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Do it, for the love of god girl you live once, your getting old, you don't wana die tomorow and have never got layed,even if you do it now your gonna love it so much that you'll regret not doing it young every day till you die, but it's to late, do what you can now, I can't imagine how much built up tension you got, now come on are you a saint or just ugly, cause with womans unfailthful nature I don't believe the only reason is cause your religious, theres more to it ha, but do what you want, my advice is to go get a make over and start getting as much sex as possible from as many partners, give in, it'll feel so good if theres still life down there, your at an age were disease shouldn't madder, but if you want to prove you aint ugly send me a pic.
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Youve left it too late, its over, give up, sex doesnt want you at this stage, if you ever have it youll probably blow your brains out for being such a baby about it
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