My mom never let me hang out with friends after school, in fact when i got out of school mom and dad left me alone and they went to their room, my dad was and addict and an alcoholic. I remember being little and just reading alone in my room. One time they got a loan for a trip to Disney an then they made me choose between a new house or the trip. Me always being a considerate child i told them to get the house, i knew thats what they wanted and they bought the house. Never taugth me anything about sex or relationships, wheneve i asked, she said she didnt know. Eventually my dad(Veteran with a pension) got lung cancer and we went to get surgery when i was 15, he never got out of that bed, he extubated himself one day and just f'ed it all up. He spent 4 years in bed, meanwhile i was into prostitution for alcohol, coke, money anything, mom really didnt do anything about she just let me. I weaned myself of all of those things. My dad died last year and shes getting a 1400 check every month from VA. She got a boyfriend and now they are going to Disney, im 19 but i still remember going to the beach 3 times in my childhood and only spendind 30mins each time. Never went on fieldtrips, never did anything. I feel like they f'ed me up and just left me... Im not sure if i should feel this way. Sorry for the long post i just need to get it off my chest.