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Is it normal to truly dislike your parents
Like they say you can choose your friends but you can't pick your family. Well given the choice I would certainly not choose my parents for anything what so ever.
I can remember being 5 years old and not liking my mother, she was a evil person to me back then as a child always fussing, arguing and fighting about something. Growing up I saw how she destroyed her own marriage and virtually destroyed my brother. It was clear to me at by the time I reached high school that she hates men. In her mind all men on earth are homosexual pedophiles. Not just passively but to the point of telling my coach that she thought I was involved with male prostitution and trying at every chance to embarrass, humiliate or belittle me....all I heard while growing up is "You aint never gonna be shyt like your no good daddy", or "You ain't got a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of". She discouraged my brother so badly that he dropped out of school to drive her around and do errands for her, now at 50 years old my brother still lives at home with her a totally broken man. There is so much evil she has done that I could literally write a book about it, from putting tacks on the floor at night so when I got out of bed to pee I would step on them, to holding a 12ga shot gun to my head while I slept, to poisoning my dog, to trying to convince my first wife to have a fight with me so she can have me committed [at the time my mother was a supervisor in a mental hospital and had the power to keep anyone there as soon as they became committed]. And to this day she acts as if she did nothing and tells people how she loves her kids. My father, well he is nothing more than a braggart who is jealous of me my success and constantly tries to brag about himself of his brothers kids.
With parents like this, is it normal to dislike them? If they were not my parents I surely would never want to know them and now that I do I would not advice anyone to know them.
I can remember being 5 years old and not liking my mother, she was a evil person to me back then as a child always fussing, arguing and fighting about something. Growing up I saw how she destroyed her own marriage and virtually destroyed my brother. It was clear to me at by the time I reached high school that she hates men. In her mind all men on earth are homosexual pedophiles. Not just passively but to the point of telling my coach that she thought I was involved with male prostitution and trying at every chance to embarrass, humiliate or belittle me....all I heard while growing up is "You aint never gonna be shyt like your no good daddy", or "You ain't got a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of". She discouraged my brother so badly that he dropped out of school to drive her around and do errands for her, now at 50 years old my brother still lives at home with her a totally broken man. There is so much evil she has done that I could literally write a book about it, from putting tacks on the floor at night so when I got out of bed to pee I would step on them, to holding a 12ga shot gun to my head while I slept, to poisoning my dog, to trying to convince my first wife to have a fight with me so she can have me committed [at the time my mother was a supervisor in a mental hospital and had the power to keep anyone there as soon as they became committed]. And to this day she acts as if she did nothing and tells people how she loves her kids. My father, well he is nothing more than a braggart who is jealous of me my success and constantly tries to brag about himself of his brothers kids.
With parents like this, is it normal to dislike them? If they were not my parents I surely would never want to know them and now that I do I would not advice anyone to know them.
Do you think it's normal?
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I mean... You're her kid. How could she be so cruel? And your father is probably just mildly annoying. But your mom is psycho, no doubt about it. Geeze. EVIL.
I think in most cases, it's normal to dislike your parents. Teens hate their parents at one point. But you, man, have a valid reason. Even in your adulthood she's acting out of line.
My mom was like yours. She wrecked her relationships, had zero direction in life, and worked hard to emasculate her sons.
She constantly told us, from a very young age, that she was going to die, that we were all going to die of cancer, that everyone was going to take advantage of us. She gave us savage beatings when we were adolescents.
She would take baths with me when I was five or 6 years old. I still remember the creepy feeling of my feet touching the wool of her vagina in the tub.
Now that I'm an adult, she tells me that I'm going to end up homeless. This coming 70 year old woman who has an 8th grade education, and will have to work at menial jobs until she drops. I've never been unemployed, and have an 800 credit score and a nice little nestegg, yet she lied to my sister that I had to eat out of homeless shelters (my sister was concerned so she asked me about it), and she tells me to my face that I'll end up homeless.
There's lots more stuff I could tell you, but I don't want to get to personal here. Long story short -- not all mothers are good mothers, and the sooner you can accept that the better. I waited late in life before I accepted it, allowing her to continue to "work her magic" all those years.
I have a question though -- are you black? The phrases your mom uses sounds like she's black ( "You aint never gonna be shyt like your no good daddy", or "You ain't got a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of". ).
I'm black, and I'm coming to believe that stuff like this -- psychological and physical abuse by black mothers -- is pretty common in our communities. Makes me wonder if the abandonment thing among black fathers of the last generation isn't more complicated than everyone thinks.
And I am pretty sure this comes from their generations notion of black men, themselves and races in general. This hatred of black men by black women goes pretty deep and spans back generations. I can see it ending in the future generations either...I only see it perpetuating.
And that ain't changing. Just gotta accept it, keep your head up, and keep grinding ...
Unfortunately, it's probably generally true that black women like us best when we're "broken down"... If we aren't, their reflex is to try to cut us down... ...Which is a major reason why black social relations are basically frozen right now, and so many of us are scrambling for "alternatives" (ie "interracial").
Is it normal, no. But she wasn't normal either, I think she had an undiagnosed mental illness to do the things she did. I guess I will never know. I just hope in time I will be able to forget the past and build my self esteem up to a normal level.