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Is it normal to want to have a baby now?
64% Normal
10 Comments

I am 20, and in a stable relationship. I live with my DBF of three years for over a year. I am on the pill, have been for three years. I have recently, in the past 6 months or so, started wanting a baby very badly. I know that I do not have the financial means, nor do I have the time to bring a child into the world. But every month, I imagine that I am pregnant. I wait and wait for my period, take a pregnancy test every day of my period starting. I count the days to my ovulation, I imagine if we have sex around that day, that I must be pregnant. I obcess about it every month. Is it normal to want this at this age? I have no idea why I want this so badly. It's almost part of my monthly cycle now. Last month, and maybe the month before I did this. I calculate my due date, etc. I feel like I'm going crazy. I think this is because I am in a stable relationship for a substancial amount of time, my natural reproductive urges are probably just following their normal path. I guess college and grad school don't fit into those plans, and neither does the country's financial crisis. Any ideas?
Do you think it's normal?
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Comments (10)
AverageTMcFlannigan (16347)
2008-10-29 10:30:03
I would say this is a pretty normal desire. I started feeling this around my 22nd birthday, but it's something that has to be kept in check. If you can't raise the child right now, you wouldn't be doing anyone a favor by having one at this time. It wouldn't be good for the child, it wouldn't be good for you, and it wouldn't be good for those who would help support you (parents, etc). If you two do decide to have a child in the future, that's great. Just don't do what my friend's wife did and silently quit taking the pill. Hello child. Hello dysfunction and foreclosure. Not fun.
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missp (17250)
2008-10-29 15:11:04
Yeah. Oh I'm taking my pill. I'm just tired of freaking out every month, thinking about it all the time. I gets time consuming and annoying. It doesn't help that I am surrounded by pregnant people at work, either. Due Dec, Feb, and March.
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violent10dency (10988)
2008-10-30 07:34:38
I think you should first finish college, and then get married and then have a baby, but only for sure if you know your partner is ready for a baby too. It is no fun being a single mother, trust me I would know. Even though it's a beautiful thing that you would have your baby and you would love him and he would love you, it is still very hard especially in these economically challenged times. BE PREPARED! You want your children to have a future, don't you?
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CookieDemons (17834)
2008-11-19 08:08:11
Everyone's biological clock has different times of coming into action. But I think you should wait until you know you are financially secure and have enough time to raise a child, before you have one. Despite the fact you really want a baby, you need to think about the stress it'll put on you and how hard it'll be if you're not prepared for it.
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missp (17250)
2008-11-19 08:32:52
@: CookieDemons
I am well aware that I should not have a baby til I am financially secure. That was not my question. I wanted to know if it was NORMAL to feel this way, not what I needed to do. I am an adult, and I know what I need to do. My only question was if it was normal to feel that way.
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OuCh_ThAt_HuRt (8544)
2009-02-28 09:11:38
There is an old saying that goes; "you can't have your cake and eat it too!!"
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Laur3n (22928)
2009-05-12 10:40:06
It is totally normal. The majority of women have/want a child a some point. It's the way the human life cycle works. Maybe get a little more organised first, and if you feel you're ready - go for it. But be aware (even though they are so adorable) of how much of your time and money they take up and if you're prepared to give that up for them.
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HalfMoonFlare (27886)
2009-09-01 12:10:39
i think it's normal for a woman at your age to want a baby. So is the conflict you're having these days. You must decide. There si no in between here.
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penelope13 (29383)
2009-10-05 01:13:12
I think it's normal to have those feelings. Take it from someone who had a child at 19 and is now 32. I had similar feelings before having my son and though I'd have it no other way, it's not for the faint of heart. I can't compare my situation to yours, but I know that if you don't have the proper foundation that will guarantee you and your child's security, you will be breaking your back to keep you and your baby above water. Or you'll settle for the kid's father or some other bloke who you may end up resenting down the road because you had little choice. You may have been together for 3 years now..maybe you're bored and want to take it to the next level. Again, that's normal. Your twenties are for self exploration and if you feel the need to care for another human being, become a nanny. Look at other ways to channel that momma energy into something less risky..like creating art, writing, etc.
No physiological desire or pressure could ever be more important than a child having a good and fair chance at having a good life. You know that proverb, "It takes a village to raise a child"? It couldn't be more true. Good luck.
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Jen118584 (30020)
2009-11-16 09:18:39
@: OuCh_ThAt_HuRt
That expression is retarded. Wtf is the purpose of a cake if not to be eaten? I really hate that expression, I can't believe it ever caught on. Whoever made it up was an idiot.

But yeah, poster, it's normal. You're a little young for it, but it's certainly not abnormal. I'm 26 and my uterus has been like, Alright LET'S DO THIS for like two years now. I dream about babies, I secretly hope that I'm pregnant every month, I'm really disappointed when I get my period.
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