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just makes me wanna rage and or die
77% Normal
22 Comments

for as long as i remember i have had anxiety about foolish things that i have done in the past and it makes me wanna die or look for something to wreck, whether it be a person or thing, i even start to make audible noises of inner agony when i think of them. some of the things that i cant stop thinking about are
-once i has dancing with a girl and her friend walks up to us and says "having fun" and i just blurt out with absolutely no filter "damn you're hot" right in front of the girl i was dancing with
-when i was in kindergarten i had a very, very very short fuse, i was unable to finish my homework in class and i lost my mind, a freind of my walked up to meand tried to calm be and i gave him a knee to the balls
-it was the last day of eighth grade and a girl that i had a huge crush on was moving , i couldn't stop stumbling on my words and felt like a total tool.

am i normal for remembering all of the foolish things that i have done in the past
Do you think it's normal?
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Comments (22)
hotchickie81 (24721)
2009-07-02 04:34:19
Sounds like we have the same kind of memory...
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moomoomilkchan (24965)
2009-07-02 05:04:48
I have incidents like that that make me rage too.
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WhoAmIForgot (24946)
2009-07-02 17:44:46
dude, shit happens, tomorrow comes, and it doesn't won't matter; eventually.

you gotta move on, you're gonna make a lot of mistakes and all you gotta do is learn from them so it's all about experience. you've got a lot of experience bro, chill out.
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violent10dency (10988)
2009-07-03 16:04:46
I think maybe you might have ADHD but then again I'm not an expert either. I remember things that people have done to me that were very wrong and it angers me and I wish I could forget the past and move on but unfortunately that is not going to happen. These experiences mold you into who you are and can either make you a better person or break you. So you have to learn how to control these memories or they will be the death of you.
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nobodie (22538)
2009-07-09 15:59:16
I have the same problem
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IsraelTheEmcee (27265)
2009-08-19 12:18:35
Man sometimes i feel the same way
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PoisonFlowers (28309)
2009-09-11 09:13:36
LOL! I am exactly the same way! It jut makes me want to..rage or die, like you said. Argh thinking about stupid stuff like that really grinds my gears like nothing else.
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mmethamphetamminen (28006)
2009-09-13 15:58:50
dude i'm sure a lot of people have the same problems with their past....

hold onn i just rage smashed my keyboardd
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Isolated (28274)
2009-09-19 11:45:06
I've had my share of embarrassing moments. When I think about it, it makes me want to hit my head on a wall or something...
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EhhMoo (27734)
2009-09-21 09:12:26
Ugh, people tell me to move on too.
I actually try to respond to the reaction in the past aloud to try to make up for it in the present.
This sounds kinda like yours.
Really no advice to give, just saying you're not alone with that.
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nobody94 (24155)
2009-09-24 20:28:27
It sounds like your living in the past. although i remember nearly every aspect of my life which is annoying, like the times i cried when i was 3 and i still remember the reasons i did, not all of which were stupid, i have friends and a busy life and i try to keep up with it. with rugby, friends, school, my own life, my girlfriend, and doing drugs (not saying its not prescribed) and stuff i barely have time to think. I do remember stupid shit i do but i tell myself it was dumb, i dont know them anymore, why would it matter. you sound like the kind of person that wouldnt want to look like a fool infront of strangers. who the **** cares!
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nothing2 (29013)
2009-09-26 20:53:14
learn to forget
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123help (28988)
2009-09-27 23:59:05
A lot of people have anxiety when it comes to the past. The best thing to do it to move on with the life you are leading now and not to dwell in the past.

Laugh it off, and think to yourself 'who cares' and focus on the present. Be happy :)
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BrightEyes (21252)
2009-10-04 17:01:29
No way, no way are you alone. I have those thoughts too, about embarassing things I've done that, when recalled, just make me burn with anger and shame. I too make audible noises or sometimes massage my temples as if that will make the memory go away.

I feel your pain.
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doctork (29725)
2009-10-13 03:17:09
dude welcome to my life. but seriously those screwups are a part of you like it or not. I see no reason to feel ashamed about it. we are human. I always reflect and wonder what in the world was I thinking. all you can do is laugh and move on.
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doompony (29766)
2009-10-13 18:04:29
Lol. That's perfectly normal. This actually made me feel good. :P
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direspore (30444)
2009-10-28 16:22:39
forgive yourself.
i used to agonise over a lot of things too, and most of the extremely embarrassing things were when i was growing up. but over time the anguish at the thought of them grows less... you forgive yourself. and those same memories have so little emotional weight now, as i'm not beating myself up about them anymore.
even newer embarrassments don't have the kind of long burn that the old ones did.
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Audacia (30528)
2009-10-30 12:08:22
Well I do the same sometimes aswell but to do it everyday isn't really normal
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shakenbake855 (29666)
2009-10-30 21:19:30
fake post is fake
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_thirty_characters_it_is_then_ (30830)
2009-11-05 11:44:18
Aaauuuugghhh I sometimes get absolutely mental thinking about stupid shit I've done :|

And then I can't stop thinking about those things and I work myself up into agitation. I start blushing all over. Then I can't relax and keep thinking 'fuck, I'm so fucking stupid, why did I do those things'.

Mostly they're social situations or situations where other people MIGHT hear about them and then secretly ridicule me or gossip. Blaarghhh. Really fucking stupid :|
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Anonymousness (30928)
2009-11-07 12:03:59
Yep. I think about it while I'm falling asleep and it makes me just want to go back and time. It really eats at you. :|
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technobanana (31072)
2009-11-11 12:40:27
Oh yes its normal !
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