lack of sex

41% Normal

11 Comments

He may want to have control over the sex. I know I tend to be that way with my boyfriend(I'm a female) and I have a hard time allowing him to initiate on me because I almost feel like he is using me, so I like to initiate it. Or...he may have some sort of embarassment like an erectile problem. I'd say it's normal. Why don't you try talking to him about it? Ask him what is up? Ask him if there is a reason that he doesn't allow you to come on to him?

I had this problem with my girlfriend. She wanted to control my supply of sex so that she could control me. I stopped shagging her altogether and we had to talk about it. We ended up making a sex rota. ok , I'm joking about that bit.
Women are much more likely to engage in this type of activity so it's unusual that a man is doing it to you. Anonymous is right, you should talk about it.

i doubt it's so much of a control issue as *his* issue. without delving into any assumed child hood trauma, etc...some guys just don't put out. it's that simple. it's not you, it's him (cliche, but totally true in this case). if having a good sex life is more important than not having a good sex life, then i'd say 1) talk to him, 2) suggest (gently) therapy 3) if all else fails, cultivate a possible extra-relationship affair and see what you're missing. then go from there. give him a chance first though---but don't sell your self short.

I am male, 31 yrs and my wife has a low sex drive. My sex drive has always been sky high. If I didn't love her so much I'd have left a long time ago. We have talked about it many times, but it seems to be just the way it is. I am trapped. Cheating appears not to be an option, as it complicates life too much, and I can't lose her. Masterbation seems to be the only (albeit temporary)relief, and patience is a necessity. I musta pissed off someone bad in a past life...

i know what u mean. sigh.

Actually, there has been recent studies of people with low sex drives being asexual. You might want to look into that. It's now being considered a sexuality, like heterosexuals, homosexuals, bisexuals. Asexuality is just where people have a lack of a sex drives. It's not that uncommon, about 1 in every 100 adults have it, but it's never talked about. Maybe you should look into it further.

i thought only women had low sex drive i have that same problem also but like the one guy said i love my wife and will not cheat for fear of getting caught but i have thought about it a lot instead i just masterbait the worst thing for me is that im trying to get it so much from her that she never comes on to me and i think its better sex when she at least acts like she wants it

gimme a call ill make it your while

I completely understand all of your comments. I am a newlywed and my husband has already exhibited a low sex drive. Men hit on me all the time, but my own husband doesn't find me attractive! It makes me so frustrated and I can feel myself withdrawing already. Help!!

I am a man , my hint is,, put him really really celous. donīt try anything else.
Never fails.

Something is definitely wrong, big time, I suggest you not ignore it if you want to remain happy. Intimacy isn't everything in a relationship but it is a big part of a healthy relationship and your well being. Since he is not driven but roughly once every two weeks and you understandably wish for it more often, you need to address this issue. If you are withdrawing because of his lack of desire, that is normal, you are resentful and makes sense. Do not dismiss this issue, tackle it.

First, he should see a doctor to see if there is a medical condition which is turning him off to sex and so seldom to have a desire. The possibilities/causes to his disinterest are endless. For example, I will give you just a random sample- even male hair growth items have potentially significant side effects that can reduce interest in sex. He may be taking a medication that is curbing his interest in sex. So, he absolutely should see a medical doctor and explain specifically why he came so the doctor can focus on this. If he checks out fine after a doctors checkup, I suggest you see a counselor, a specialist in this field, not just any counselor. It is not a minor issue, it is major and your relationship is at stake. I am interpreting from your post that he was not always like this, but has turned himself off to sex recently which raises red flags. Good luck to you both.