My partner won't sleep with me. What shall I do?

19% Normal

9 Comments

It is common for this to happen after a women has a baby. its like the man goes from viewing his wife as the sexy hot wife to the sweet innocent mother of his child. Do what he said and just stop putting so much pressure on it. Let it happen naturally. stop thinking about it and just enjoy your husband and your baby and find activities together you can do as a family. This doesn't even have to mean going someplace expensive. Even just taking a walk together on a warmer afternoon would be good. Try having date nights with your husband to. The one on one time might give you guys a chance to get closer. If he says he loves you, I wouldn't doubt it. If things don't change within a few months, try talking to him again. Tell him how you feel and simply state and tell him "If you don't love me, than I would rather you just leave." Hope this helps!

Okay well, some people just don't have much sex drive, and there can be lots of reasons why...

* depression
* stress or fatigue
* childhood sexual abuse, assault, trauma, or neglect
* body image issues
* lack of interest/attraction in partner
* sexual performance anxiety
* poor diet, lack of physical activity

If you don't think that could be an issue then maybe you should see a doctor as they do make medicine to increase peoples libido.

and beyond all of that, you need to have a serious talk with him, you need to make sure that he still loves you and determine what is holding you two apart. You need to tell him that you have needs! and how you really feel about him and the situation.

When you do talk to him about it, don't let him interrupt you or walk away! Make notes and bring them with you! so you don't forget anything in case you get nervous. Now is not the time to be shy you have a child and sex is a major part of marriage.

If you don't work things out it will most likely lead to divorce later.

Not having sex for over 18 months with your spouse I see as very abnormal. It's harsh to say that you should leave him, but does he show any interest in you? Or is sex really the only issue? Guys need to get it out every once and a while, if he's not doing it with you, where is he doing it?

Im sorry to be the one to bring this up but if he is not having sex with u are u positively sure that he is not having sex with someone else?

that could be so true...he could also be gay

i don't think he is gay maybe when you had the baby you got fat and now he thinks your nasty,or he just doesn't like you anymore.
shit happens,you move on :)

i really feel for ya honey that sounds proper harsh, i would take him out back and beat him with a bat, seriously tho, i would tell him that unless he starts explaining to you why he cant do nothing with u, that u will leave him. because if its making you feel like that then it not fair on you at all and you shouldnt have to put up with it, may sound a bit cold but harsh love like that.
hope things work out for ya

It isn't normal. It isn't fair. And above all else, it must be very bad for your ego. You need to figure out if you really could be with someone who doesn't want sex like you do. I think for some people, it just isn't a priority. And for others, it is a necessity of life. If you aren't matched up as you want....you may want to rethink this relationship.