People who seem fake

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Hi,

I can totally relate to your feelings. I share an executive office with the VP in a hospital and he is constantly laughing at almost everything the medical director jokes about. 99% is not amusing at all, but it always helps to kiss up to the boss I suppose. I think for some, that kind of behaviour is a combination of their own insecurities and their desire to advance. When I first meet someone I despise the question "what do you do", how generic and you might as well ask me for a copy of my tax returns. I grew up with conservative values and things like your job or how much you paid for your house were never discussed. Today's society is shot-minded and mostly dummed-down, superficial, and weak. Is there any hope? :)

Well Claro, your answer and understanding shows me there is still hope. I grew up with the same type of values and people had mutual respect for others for the most part. And yes, I agree most act fake from insecurities and also to kiss up, but many cross the line beyond that into little or no substance. As far as work goes, dealing with people on a consistent basis is definitely the most difficult because you can't avoid them the same as a person you happen to meet or just near. I just try to understand people but my patience does get thin sometimes and specifically with plastic people.

I know a few blokes that have a different personality in front of their partner but are totally different away from them. I also know people who will rush out and buy something theyve seen you have and try and out do you.

I sometimes used to wonder this myself, but I have come to the conclusion that people aren't really fake, because in any given situation, even if people put on a show, it really is who they are.

My biggest problem when it comes to people is I work in customer service, but when I'm out in public I have no idea how to engage in "small talk" with complete strangers. People don't always know what to say. The most common form of communication I hear everyday is "how are you?" that question gets so boring, and agrivating after you hear it 20 times a day. If they really cared how you were doing they would let you finish saying how you felt or what you had recently been up to. When people laugh at things that aren't funny, especially when woman do that, oh man is that annoying. Another thing people do that makes me clench my jaws is when they say thank-you a million times for something, it's like "you're welcome, wou're welcome now shut the hell up!"

I even put myself in a shell because I can't make friends with people very well, especially girls. I can make friends with guys, but usually they just want to go out, so I try to stay away from them too. It's really hard being around people if you aren't a people person, and it's even harder if you are, because then you really have to atleast look like you know what you're doing all the time.

I think you should stop focusing on what you think about other people, and focus on you. Nobody is perfect by any means, people are under pressure to become the "better" them everyday, sadly it's the way our culture has become. As long as you are happy, and you are trying to be an individual then why does it matter what others act like?

Why does it matter what others act like? Well, because no matter what you do and where you go, you have to deal with people. I will say I understand exactly what you mean on making friends but think about this, maybe you have a tough time (as others and me as well) making friends because you can never deal with the real "them". The world has changed very much in the short time I've been on this planet (36yrs) and I believe the culture in the US has changed faster than anywhere else in the world. It's all about what you have, your job, your car, your house or the lack of, etc. You are correct on continue being one's self encircled by fake, pretentious people but to say stop focusing on this fact would be to say stop focusing on paying your bills. Either way it's something you have to deal with and I am here discussing it. I can be myself all day long and I am happier doing so and I honestly care less about what others think, mostly these pretentious people, and I'm glad I do. But I do this at a cost in multiple ways.

While I'm already here I will add something else. I believe the biggest problem in our country today is class warfare, which i think directly relates to how the US culture has evolved into what it is today, besides a few other things of course as well. Between a weak congress and companies that would sell their own mother to make higher profits, our country is being sold right out from beneath us and by the very people we vote into office (Rep and Dem) and the lobbyists who control them. If I was to say I found the root of all evil and where the problem lies within.. I would have to say it's money. Trust me, i live in northern Va where the average income is $70k/yr and I'm lucky to make half of that and survive. People here could not be any more rude or inconsiderate, and generally the snobbiest people I've ever dealt with and I'm originally from Wv to give you an idea of my background. To steal a couple lines from a movie.. "what is the answer to 99 out of 100 questions?" ...money

money is good yes but i think he is speaking about some thing deeper than your 70 k or whatevr you make,believe me money is important but it isnt everything despite what the media wants you to believe,a higher level of consciousness wish i had a answer but there is no hope the world is consumed like people of this nature