Plural Marriage or Sharing my Husband

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12 Comments

No. What you are doing is already unhealthy for you, your husband, and your kids.

If this is the kind of activity you like to engage in, it would have been wise never to have gotten married, especially not have kids who are highly at risk of becoming hurt by your behavior, should it ever be revealed to them somehow. And if they already know about it, then you are facing a catastrophic train wreck down the road from here.

Remember that your children will one day turn out better or worse than you, all based upon the moral foundations you taught them by.

I suggest you seek help and fix this problem before it's too late. Before the consequences bare a price too steep to pay.

If you're talking mutual love instead of just sex, that's known as polyamory, and although it wouldn't be classed as normal per say, there's nothing inherently wrong with it, and if you google it you should find plenty of people who are into the same sort of thing.

your husband is a very lucky man

yes it is possible and understand the subjective nature of healthy as it is not a static convention but changes with understanding

I don't think it would be a good idea if you have kids in the house. Once they move out and are on their own, then you're more free to do what you want without negatively affecting the kids; but I still think that in the long run, it will cause more problems than it would solve. You and your husband should work at fulfilling each other's needs - be they emotional or sexual - without bringing someone else into the marriage relationship/bed.

Me and my husband have done this, but it's not been something casual. We've actually developed relationships with any of the people we've been with, and even when they moved on to a relationship of their own, we've still remained friends with them :). You can have a healthy relationship and still make it work out n_n. Even with children, because we have a little boy who'll be three this year

That's difficult... Only because we live in a society that sees this as wrong and requiring "therapy".

As the above poster stated, there's nothing inherently wrong with it, it's just considered culturally/morally wrong. Maybe you should take your question up with Dan Savage (writer of the Savage Love advice column). He's good with advice for things like this, and does research when need be. :)

Good luck to you!

Very Very Very difficult

A woman will eventually turn into a WOMAN, no matter how open minded she seems at first. So if you let someone in to share and she seems open minded and cool, it won't last long. She will inevitably start to think, plot, and cause drama. You have to be very picky and really know who you are dealing with, background etc. Just as an idea, you might want to look at another culture. People from other cultures may be truly more accepting to this and more easily fit into the role.

Wow! I could never share my husband. I don't think this is a common practice and I don't know if it could really work long term. Also, make sure the woman likes you better than the husband or she is going to steal you man and home in the long run.

I doubt it.

You better keep it at what it is. if it's not broke dnt fix it.

Lucky husband. I know I once enjoyed seing my wife making love with another guy but that was a once-off and we don't let that happen any longer. It was hot while it lasted but that was that. Bett cool it while it's still peacfull.