Self Concious in Bed

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18 Comments

If he bitches are you more than complimenting you, maybe he's not the right guy for you

after such experience like with your ex, there isn't not much YOU can do... It's all up to your boyfriend now, he should tell you how beautiful you are as often as he can, untill you believe it ;)

You speak of one person. Try lots more guys, I mean LOTS more. You'll soon learn that you can please at least 50% of guys. I am free on sundays.

Try to ask your bf what he fantasy about girl? What kind of clothes, what he wants you to do. Every guys have different like, so I don't know. I do ask my husband what he wants and I'll do what he wants. It's hard to find it ourself. Be proud of yourself that you are pretty. The x didn't know how lucky he had you. Start a new life with a bf now.

well if ur latest boyfriend isnt complaining then you should assume he is enjoying it. try and find out what stuff he likes etc and just do it. dont be self conscious, he wouldnt be with you if he didnt think you were good in bed.

the best way to get over insecurity is to be confident in bed. Take charge in the bedroom an tell him what you want from him. If you do this (though it may be difficult at first) he will start to wonder whether he is competent and the tables will be turned. Plus I don't know a single man who dosn't like an aggressive lover. The women I remember fondly as lovers always told me what they liked and didn't like & were open to the same from me.

If you do not have one, you may want to consider getting a dimmer light switch installed in your bedroom. The reason why I suggest this is you can adjust it to a low light level so that you can still see each other but retain your privacy unlike performing in bright lights or during the daytime where every detail is revealed.

Intimacy in dim lighting with some soft playing jazz music via a CD to avoid commercial radio interruptions makes for a atmosphere conducive to romance.

You are not alone, many girls do not feel comfortable exposing themselves. I'd take a guess that if the lights were adjusted to a very low level so you can both still see each other but not every detail on your bodies, you would feel much more at ease.

As far as you hating the way you look and your fear of performing, these sound like areas you may want to consider counseling. I have no idea what brought this about or what is going on in your mind. Seek out a counselor that can address issues of spousal intimacy/sex and most will likely pinpoint the problem and with "YOUR" cooperation, help you to resolve it.

Good luck!!!

let him fuck you in the ass, then give him a blowjob to clean off the shit, then swallow the cum and shit together. he'll like that.

I felt the same way as you. maybe you should try to have sex in the beginning in like. the dark. in a car or something. so you can see a little bit if your embarrassed you cant show much. and after a while you wont be as self concious. and if your scared that your not gonna be good enough at doing something, just go for it. and practice makes perfect. and im sure a guy wont mind if you practice on him. Hope this works :)

i'm in that same exact situation except i jsut lost my virginity to my boyfriend so i still dont know much but i do try to please him... but i'm way too self concious. and i wont let him go down on me. and i dont take my bra off unless it's dark and i'm not on top. i think i just need to get over it but it is hard. and i'm sure you have nothing to worry about. get his opinion.

sadly many young women think their self worth comes from some idiot BF who is probably just wanting sex anyway and could care less about what you feel.secondly if you found someone who truly loved you,instead of just a sexual relationship,you wouldnt have to worry about trival stuff like you asked about.

im the same way, sort of.. I'm still a virgin and dont plan on sex yet, but im still very self consious. i have my reasons, but i feel as if i dont need to share.

Ashley aka Angel

"I am so self concious of myself and my body that it is effecting my sex life. I hate the way I look, though I am not over weight, I can't stand being seen by my boyfriend. I am also so afraid of performing because I am afraid that it's not going to be "good enough" for him and he's not going to enjoy it. Most of this is because my ex-boyfriend never really mentioned anything he liked from me and always criticized everything I tried to do to pleasure him. Now I have this phobia of performing in bed and or being seen naked."

that is exactly how I feel!!!! lol

that was your ex, he is prob a jerk, just start up again and if it goes wrong again for you. find a nicer guy!

just dont be, ignor your ex. duh

just give him a little head.

and use your teeth.

Lets see how you perform.... have sex with a stranger...

okay... f*ck your old boyfriend. not literally. cause you already did that and he didnt like it. damn, i got nothing really.