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Serious depression.
49% Normal
15 Comments

I've been in therapy and on medication for a long time and it doesn't seem to be helping. Because of problems with social anxiety and other assorted health problems, it's taken me several years (way over four) to get my bachelor's degree from college. Now that I've graduated, the jobs available to me are the same ones before I had a degree, and I absolutely hated college and went only to appease my parents, so I feel that I've wasted all those years of my life.
My two best friends are both leaving town and moving to other cities. I don't have any other friends, and I don't have any faith that I'm going to make some. My social anxiety is so crippling that I rarely even leave the house. I was insanely lucky to meet the two friends I had. Now my boyfriend is saying that if I can't learn to interact with people that he's going to leave me. I feel like I've tried everything, and I don't think the problem will ever resolve itself. I'm so afraid of people that I've started to hate them.
I don't want to live like this, and I feel like I've worked so hard on trying to "fix myself" that I'm completely out of options. I think about suicide a lot.
Do you think it's normal?
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Comments (15)
smithee (4389)
2007-03-11 01:32:48
First of all, I think you should see a doctor first or maybe a counselor. there are ways to treat anxiety, especially social anxiety. The doc or specialist will help you through.
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justincase858 (5372)
2007-03-11 22:53:38
God just fucking hates you
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Nodo_TheRanter (5564)
2007-03-12 13:42:09
Go to a doctor and get happy meds.
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pooponyou (6485)
2007-03-12 14:08:36
Start going to church, those type of people tend to help a lot! You can also find a much better boyfriend there too. You're current b/f sounds like a piece of shi* and you need to kick him to the curb as he is just dragging you down further. He won't expect it either and maybe he'll learn a valuable lesson. Life sucks, everyone knows that. It has it's ups and downs, it's just life. We all have to learn to deal with it one way or another. Believe me, we've all been depressed over one thing or another. I'm always stressed out about everything.

But I can promise you this, things will get better, you just need to hang around a better, happier crowd of people, they will help bring your confidence level up.
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chancellor183 (7711)
2007-04-17 22:02:42
Have you looked into food alergies. May sound unrelated but if you have intollerances to some foods they can cause serious health problems including depression. I was recently diagnosed with Fructose Malabsorbtion which can cause mood swings. Since I have stopped eating foods containing fructose I have noticed remarkable improvement. Hope it helps.

as for some of the other comments posted to your question - they should give you some belief that you actually a decent person after all, I mean you justincase and strangelad.
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Eleanore (6767)
2007-05-02 04:02:18
I'd suck a fart out of your ass and hold it in like a bong hit.
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thefrizzkid123 (8550)
2007-06-02 16:54:45
dnt be such assholes!
music and chocolate.
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Anonymous_Donor (10044)
2007-08-17 01:13:26
If you're serious please try a different doctor. There should be something that he or she can do for you. A combination of drugs and therapy might do the trick. I have a bit of social anxiety myself. Or, you can drop your boyfriend and come stay with me. We can stay at home all the time and have sex..................................

I have the number of all the food delivery places in the area!
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XxsucideXburnsxX (7669)
2007-08-24 09:35:29
you don't have to be in your house all the time.. and if you want I can be your friend.. you need some friends people to make you happy.. and collage is always a waste but we need it anyways.. it's life.. of course it sucks.. but we live it and it's all we got.. so make the best of it..


E-Mail me sometime.. XGermanXDeathxX@aim.com
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October (10003)
2007-09-07 10:06:03
@: justincase858
God just fucking Hates the poster?

You'd know something about God hating someone, wouldn't you, asshole?

@ Poster

A couple of things for you to consider. If you've been on anti-depressives for a number of years it might be time to look into a different set of meds. Sometimes the body develops a resistance. Just a thought.

For your other problems, social anxienty is a bitch, I have it too - IRL - for reasons unsaid. But hey, try One to One hangouts, less pressure, or internet friends.

Works well for me. :)

Tobra
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kazumishintani (11573)
2007-11-14 16:25:39
You have not exhausted every single possibility that is within your power at this point in life. It would be illogical to kill yourself when you haven't even tried everything.

As one with a little knowledge about this sort of thing, I can tell you that you need to try different therapists. Therapists take different approaches to fixing a problem. Also, medication can make some people worse, or just not work at all. You might need to adjust your dose or find a different medication.

If you're afraid of people to the point of where it's really disrupting your life, I'd tell that to your therapist, too. That can also be of concern, but it can be dealt with. With the right course of treatment, the prognosis can be good.
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gentleromeo (15345)
2008-07-28 19:59:52
Ill be your friend /pen pal via the comp when i can. get at me any time freadu(at)yahoo.com and ill give you my aim contact info an put ya on my buddy list i live in champlin minnesota u.s.a..ill never ask for your personal info or be mean or talk dirty ect. if you want but sorry i type kina slow with 1 finger and my spelling is my worst subject,but i do give sound advise.so good fortune buena suarte Y via con dios
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Deathonastick (16030)
2008-08-30 04:39:08
I don't know if I have real depression, all I know is that Ive always had few friends and been unpopular, but managed to stay reasonably happy, and around 15 I became so introverted and reluctant to work I think I may have had a breakdown. It's not the same thing, and I think you obviously have a worse time than me, but I would say that the best thing you can do is try and take it slowly and put yourself In more uncomfertable situations. If this bf of yours dumps you, you shoudlnt get really upset because hes obviously a jerk who dosnet understand what you suffer from, and should be doing his best to make you feel comeftable and not under pressure. If he dumps you-then good riddance, if he dosent, well thats good too, but I wouldnt say you 'need' him.
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suiri (17428)
2008-11-04 13:39:53
I know a bit where you're comming from. I had few friends growing up and was mostly a loner. I didn't talk to anyone and perfer to sit by myself. I thought about sucide as well. I use to abuse pills and took all sort of sleep medication, because simply, living in the dream world was preferably then to the waking one.(please don't do that). The thing I would suggest is to find one hobby that you love. For me, it was my love of books and cartoons (disney) and animation. When you find something you love, they're bound to be someone who love the same thing. You don't have to go out to a crowd immidently. Maybe you could meet just one person and start up a conversation. I meet someone once when I dropped my pencil sharper. The guy picked it up for me and I think I made some comment about me being clumsy and asked him what he thought about the class. Next thing I know, we were greeting each other causually.
Never understimate the power of small talk.
Try it and let me know what happens.
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suiri (17428)
2008-11-04 13:42:09
Sorry about the grammer and spelling. English wasn't my first langage.
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