Are You Normal?
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Should he still be in touch with his ex?
My boyfriend is still very close to his ex - they have been split up 2 years and were together 5. He has always told me they are still friends. This was not a problem until she spilt up with her boyfriend and started to 'pop round' more often. I am not the jealous type but her boyfriend didn't know they were still friends, she always got in touch when she knew I wasn't there,and she was using him as a shoulder to cry on. What made me more suspicious was the fact that when they were together she cheated on him twice, and she cheated on the current boyfriend. I told him I thought she was getting in touch a lot, he dismissed my worries and said he was doing nothing wrong. I said a trused him, it's her i don't trust. He stopped mentioning her. I asked him about this and he said there was nothing to say so I left it at that. A couple of days ago I checked his phone and there were messages from her. I confronted him and he said he didn't say anything because he knows I don't like him seeing her and he had seen her over xmas. I am pretty sure he bought her a present. He has now gone to the other extreme and said he will tell me every word they say to each other. He can't see my point of view at all. I said going behind my back has made it worse.
Am I over reacting?? We have only been together 6 months and he says he loves me - he hasn't told her he loves me though. I am still friends with my ex but I have made it very clear to him that I am in love and serious about my boyfriend and he understands that and I hardly ever see him.
Am I over reacting?? We have only been together 6 months and he says he loves me - he hasn't told her he loves me though. I am still friends with my ex but I have made it very clear to him that I am in love and serious about my boyfriend and he understands that and I hardly ever see him.
Do you think it's normal?
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Consider for a second he is being totally innocent. How must HE feel, that you have no trust in him at all, and are checking his phone?
Give him a chance, have faith, then if he BREAKS your trust, you can be rid of him in the safe knowledge that you are doing the right thing.
i've done it.
i'll do it again sorry.
im a girl and i think that if a boy can treat me like shit i will throw shit at them.
not litterally.
mainy what im saying is just think of it as if you started getting close to your old ex say you dated one for 5 years and stuff.
something would obviously be there.
i mean like it would be hard for there not to be....most of the time
i mean come on dont tell yourself things you want to hear....people cheat people lie.
especially to the ones they love.
im just being honest so dont hate me for my opinion=]
i would really hope that he is a good guy though and that he means what he says. if you trust him you do...if you dont then you dont.
i understand its just her you dont trust cause man she sounds like shhes a skank.
cheating is very bad...but it happens
let me know how things work out=]
i mean thing about it if hes spending time with her but not telling you something might be a little off with that.
I think you are learning something new about your bf: he doesn't get you and is selfish - which may not be something you like - but is also not unusual since you've only known him 6 months.
Who can say - but it kind of looks like the beginning of the end.
It is totally normal for someone to have a close friendship with an ex -- especially one they spent five years with! It is probably an important friendship for him, and it seems natural for him to be her "shoulder to cry on."
If she is actually flirting with him, acting shady, or badmouthing you, then that's something else entirely. But if she's just spending time with your boyfriend as a friend, who cares?
try to imagine it from the girlfriend's point of view - imagine that you are a guy and your girlfriend's EX boyfriend wants to come around and start callin, maybe not everytime he breaks up with a new girl and comes crying, but just maybe anytime he feels like getting some a dat good you-know-what - your girlfriend may not even be interested and not giving anything else away, but its still disrespectful and strange - How do the two know each other? Cuz they used to bang. Why are they still talking? Maybe they're gonna bang?
Fine, the girl should be open and communicate her feelings and try to trust, OBVIOUSLY SHE IS TRYING TO SEE IT FROM HIS POINT OF VIEW OTHERWISE SHE WOULD BE GONE. NO?
And that is why your advice was fukt up.She shouldn't be thinking that she doesn't have a right to feel how she feels, she just needs to communicate it properly. She needs to tell her boyfriend that it makes her UNCOMFORTABLE that he hangs out with his ex. That should be understandable to him, ask him to imagine, genuinely, if the tables were turned what his feelings would be. The man must show some understanding and then the two can make a solution. IF he pretends NOT to see ANY problem at all, then he is a prik. Because he is maybe lying to himself and more importantly, LYING TO YOU about what he knows is right and wrong. If he pretends not to know that, then he is a fuckin pussy.
Keep ya head up, you girl!
I hate to say this as well, but if he hasn't physically cheated on you with this bitch (his ex), then he's definately emotionally cheating on you. Which hurts even more I think, honestly.
Think about it, he cares about her. wonder who he would choose if it really came down to it? Maybe you should put that to the test, and remember you deserve to be the only woman to influence your man, that's how it should be. if he's not 100% you should run, we've all been there, we've all fallen in love. You should NOT let it happen, please, your life will be better and so much less painful in the long run.
after two years apart they obviously arnt getting together but
you will always come second to her because she shared most of his life
after time you will become more important but not after 6 month