Are You Normal?

Ask your question today!

Should I sleep with him/tease him to hurt him?
Favorited (undo)
43% Normal
13 Comments

Christ, I should probably add a bit of context.
Okay, so I met a guy off Tinder back in December. We got close 'n whatnot, slept together within a week of meeting each other and then we decided to start 'exclusively dating.' It's basically a relationship in everything but the name. I would've been happy to call it a relationship, but he's still technically married. So...yeah. They're separated and everything, he doesn't live with her.
Also, he's a little older than me. Few year age gap. I'm 18.

It was amazing for ages, and I honestly felt so happy this time. It was just different. I'd only recently lost my virginity when we met so when we started having sex, it was still a new concept. Still is, if I'm honest.
But lately, things have gone to sh*t. He just seems to be using me for sex, it seems. There's no dates, he left me to walk home alone in the middle of the night when I couldn't see straight and decided to ditch me on Valentine's day to go on a camping expedition by himself to get some time to himself. I give, and I give but there's no giving back, you know? He's so wrapped up in his own problems that he can't see how much he's taking me for granted.

It's going to hurt, but I already know I'm going to break things off.

And yes, I know it's immature that I want to hurt him. Sue me. I want to be a little petty after everything that's happened.

You know that scene in Wolf of Wall Street? She sleeps with him then tells him that they're never having sex again? That's kind of what I want to do, or something similar. I know he's obsessed with sleeping with me for some reason, so I can use that to my advantage. It's the leverage I have over him.
And believe me, I want to leave a lasting impression.

So guys and gals, do I do this to hurt him? My plan is to turn up in stockings, lacy underwear and a long coat. Sleep with him, then tell him that was the last time he ever touches me. Or maybe not even sleep with him, just be a tease. I know THAT would rile him up. Blue balls and all that jazz.
Only thing I'm worried about is him feeling emasculated and freaking out at me, e.g. violence. He's not a violent guy, but everyone has a snapping point.

What do you think?

Is It Normal?
Next >>
Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks! [Report] [Best Of] [Vulgar] [Funny] [Fake] [Weird] [Interesting]
Comments (13)
You're 18, dating + fucking an older married man and now you're complaining that he's using you for sex. Go figure.
Comment Hidden (show)
-
You're right. All guys are pigs. Shouldn't give anyone the benefit of the doubt, they're all disgusting.
Comment Hidden (show)
-
If that's how you want to spin it. I just don't see how going after married men is ever going to end well.
Comment Hidden (show)
It is immature and petty. But, hey, what he's doing to you is just as bad. It's funny seeing all the comments from boys(shocking that they're all boys, isn't it?) who have no problem with what he's doing to you but are horrified by the idea of you turning the tables on him.

I think the concern about him turning violent is legitimate, though, it's definitely not paranoia. Lots of boys who don't seem like the violent type can turn violent in a heartbeat. One solution to that would be handcuffs. I don't know what kind of sex you two are into, but you could tell him you want to try something new, handcuff him to the bed, then safely say whatever you want and bail. Or get something like pepper spray or mace, which would be a good idea to carry around in your purse anyway. If you're going to follow through on this, you definitely need to factor in the possibility of him turning violent...because, again, I cannot stress enough that guys who "aren't the violent type" can and do turn violent.

Of course, there are also other ways to get revenge. For example, you could ghost him. Get him all worked up on the phone or in texts or however you communicate, get him really looking forward to your next meeting, and then don't show up. And never respond to him again.

The last thing I will say is remember that there's almost certainly going to be a day when you look back and regret doing this...I don't expect telling you that to make you not do it, I just say it as a warning that you don't want to go too far over the top. You don't need to hurt him as much as you want to right now in order to feel like you've gotten back at him.
Comment Hidden (show)
Ages? You're 18.

But no. NEVER sleep with someone as a manipulation tactic. Not unless you want someone to return that favor.
Comment Hidden (show)
-
Well, I say ages. For me it was. Normally my relationships last a few weeks, if that.
Comment Hidden (show)
-
You shouldn't even be dating in general. You don't have the maturity to understand "friends with benefits" "sex with no strings attached" etc.

You got used for sex and created a whole fantasy land in your head about what you thought was going to happen between you and this guy and now you can't deal with the very real possibility it won't ever happen.

He doesn't care about you and you got used lol.
Comment Hidden (show)
you should listen to some Melanie Martinez to make you happy girlll
Comment Hidden (show)
I think it's best NOT to do it in the case that this guy will become violent and take what he wants regardless.
Comment Hidden (show)
-
If anything, he'd tell me to fuck off or get out if he got angry. He doesn't seem like the type to turn violent, but it was a thought that crossed my mind.
I'm paranoid like that.
Comment Hidden (show)
I would definitely sleep with him one last time just because good sex you know? Maybe drop little hints while ur in bed like "oh I'm going to miss this" *fuck him harder before he can think about what you said* play with his head a little and enjoy yourself one last time. Then just leave. Don't tell him you're going to. Leave him a note. Move on with your life but he will always remember you that way so win win for you.
Comment Hidden (show)
You need to consult a psychiatrist. Your conditions isn't normal. You may be a danger to yourself and people around you.
Comment Hidden (show)
-
The sad truth is that you're going to lose him eventually. The reason for losing him is irrelevant. Enjoy having sex with him for as long as you can. He's not using you for sex. you're using him. Trust me.
Comment Hidden (show)

Sorry, you need to be signed in to comment.

Click here to sign in or register.