Seven years ago, my brother's wife and their three daughters were driving to visit another friend out of state. They'd hardly gone more than a few miles out of town before his wife inexplicably veered off the road and into an embankment, crashing about 150 feet from the top of the highway. No one was properly belted, and everyone in the car received injuries. The middle child was the most severely injured, however, and was taken to the hospital with serious head injuries. She never regained consciousness and died approximately one week later.
My sister-in-law was never able to explain to my brother or to the police why she left the road, and she was cited for reckless driving. While no one feels that she caused the accident intentionally, her behavior is difficult to understand. And since she passed away herself several years ago, we obviously will never know precisely what happened that afternoon.
My brother has never fully recovered from the loss of his daughter, who was only 11. I feel that he uses her death as an excuse to remain stagnant in life. He remains under-employed and lonely, and has difficulty forming new friendships and keeping active. I know that grieving is different for each person, but seven years is quite a long time to be paralyzed by such sorrow. Is there anything I can tell him or suggest to him that might help him to move on? Thanks.
My sister-in-law was never able to explain to my brother or to the police why she left the road, and she was cited for reckless driving. While no one feels that she caused the accident intentionally, her behavior is difficult to understand. And since she passed away herself several years ago, we obviously will never know precisely what happened that afternoon.
My brother has never fully recovered from the loss of his daughter, who was only 11. I feel that he uses her death as an excuse to remain stagnant in life. He remains under-employed and lonely, and has difficulty forming new friendships and keeping active. I know that grieving is different for each person, but seven years is quite a long time to be paralyzed by such sorrow. Is there anything I can tell him or suggest to him that might help him to move on? Thanks.
you cant expect a miracle or anything to happen over night but the wait will be worth it.
I think he got so used to bein sad, its taken over his life and he's been like it for so long its hard to get out.
as for greif, some people grieve their whole lives... some probably worse than your brother.
Hope that helped..
a site like this: full of immature heartless kids,
isn't the place to ask for advice.
See a councelor, stay strong, God Bless.
Since then I have lost my marriage and my home and its only now 7 years later I can honestly say 'yes I'm getting over it'.
So what your brother is going through, god only knows!!
compared to losing a mum (you sort of expect your mum to die in your lifetime mind not at the age of 59yrs) but too lose a child. All I can say is that it does take a lot of time and it is different for everyone.
My heart goes out to you and your family and I really hope things work out soon for you all xx
I don't know you or your brother except for what you have told me, so I will try to help you as best as I can.
The loss of a child is arguably the most devastating thing that can happen to anyone. The pain that he feels must be excruciatingly agonizing even after all these years. Your brother will move on at his own pace. He may never move on and you will have to accept that. As his sibling, just remember to be there for him and help him whenever you can.
To you , seven years might not seem like a long time, but for those who have lost a child, it is merely the beginning of an eternity of suffering.