The IIN iPhone app is coming soon! Stay tuned...

Are You Normal?

Curious how others might perceive your situation? Submit your story today and find out what others think...

Home > All Categories > Thoughts

Suicidal thoughts
42% Normal
44 Comments

Hello, Everyone,
Sorry if my story is a drag, but I dont
see any point of living any longer.
The only reason I am alive is because Im not
selfish enough to cause my family and pets
the terrible aftermath. I dont see my
family much and were not good chatting on
the phone. I feel Im just living to feed
the ducks at the pond, care for my bunny and budgie and keep Tesco Express ordering monster munch. I love the earth the stars and people
but it seems all the people I know are depressed and caught up in the local knews,
everyone is ill. Last month I tried to cut
my wrist but all the impliments were to blunt.
I felt better, calmer, after I saw a shallow wound. I am seeing a mind doctor but I dont
feel comfortable with him, my GP couldnt give
a sh*t. Ive got backpain from an injury, Im
on opiates for pain. I used to be so optimistic, busy and I used to thank God for
my life but my faith is all but disappeared. Can anyone who wonts to comment, give me a view on the fact that, might it be selfish for loved ones to keep you alive if your in utter
hopelessness, unhappy with how we have to live?
Do you think it's normal?
Next >>
Does this story fit one of these flags? If so, click it! [Best Of] [Funny] [Interesting] [Weird] [Stupid] [Lame] [Vulgar] [F*cked Up] [Fake] [Off Topic] [Innapropriate] [Adult]
Comments (44)
NeoFalcon (15397)
2008-10-01 14:01:19
Sometimes you need to be proactive in life and realise what potential you have.
Report
Reply
flikr (10636)
2008-10-01 17:06:47
if you get depressed over the news, please kill yourself

if you don't want to kill yourself over a animal also please kill yourself
Report
Reply
cabinet70 (4440)
2008-10-01 21:20:28
you sound like a fukwit end it now
Report
Reply
cruelintentions (10923)
2008-10-02 11:43:04
God is dead. We are all selfish, there is not one human alive that is not. You are selfish in not wanting to "kill yourself." Why? because you feel bad when you think about the "hurt" that your family will feel, so in order to spare yourself that emotion you rationalize it as being selfish. Plus its an excuse not to kill yourself, your not really committed to it.

You should seek medical help ASAP. Finding a good psychologist is like finding a best friend, be picky. Also seeing someone for an hour a week usually is not enough. I suggest you start taking antidepressants like welbutrine and effexor they are very safe and very effective. Good luck...
Report
Reply
s2k1099 (16645)
2008-10-02 13:21:10
God is not dead, as this person above me stated.He does make a point in saying that we are all selfish, but that's natural, otherwise the human race would not exist, because people would not eat nor drink because they don't care about themselves, and we would die of illnesses that could be solved with a simple antibiotic regiment. If something as simple as your pets make you feel like you can't end your life, then someone is telling you, that you shouldn't.
Report
Reply
inside_out (16593)
2008-10-04 18:48:35
there is never a valid reason to end you life. and although you may not see it every life if worth living.
Report
Reply
pringletot3 (16677)
2008-10-04 19:37:09
@: s2k1099
Just because he won't kill himself because he's worried about how it will affect his family and pets does not mean anyone is speaking to him. It could mean that he doesn't really want to kill himself and he was looking for a reason why he shouldn't kill himself and that was the one he got, even if he doesn't think that he was just looking for a reason he probably, sub-consciously, was.

@poster

Don't kill yourself, is there any particular reason as to why you are depressed? or do you just feel that way? Did something terrible happen suddenly in your life which turned you that way? Keep in mind that something minor could've started a snowball effect causing what you know feel, so mention anything negative at all. Get help, you need it.

PS. If you take my advice and get some psychiatric help can you tell me how much it costs plz?
Report
Reply
melissacooperson (16676)
2008-10-05 07:22:08
KILL YOURSELF

I dont care what you think. Everyone on this forum is a fucking loser! I have my own business. But coz I think all you guys are married to losers and you dont know wat it is like to be pampered. Thats all I was looking for, being a lil mollycoddled and pampered by the person who claims to love me!

Miss Oct- I hope you end up with no one coz anyone who gets married to you will end up killing himself anyway!

WHORE BITCH!! DIE AND ROT IN HELL!!
Report
Reply
bongobongo (16612)
2008-10-07 13:16:39
@: s2k1099
Thanks laot for your advice. Im not going to
kill myself Im just really depressed. Cheers.
Report
Reply
bongobongo (16612)
2008-10-07 13:17:47
@: pringletot3
Thanks alot for your advice, Im not going to
kill myself I cant. Take care.
Report
Reply
bongobongo (16612)
2008-10-07 13:18:56
@: cruelintentions
Thanks alot for your advice Im not going to
kill myself I cant. Take care.
Report
Reply
sLyXeH (16786)
2008-10-09 05:04:25
Yer well at least you have thought of a reason not to kill yourself and its a damn good reason, there's many ways to improve your own happiness you just have to be willing to go out there and try them maybe join a youth group (not the cultish kind those guys are just weird) umm since your religious maybe Antioch if you have one near you. If your unfit maybe try and get fitter a healthy person is more likely to have a healthy state of mind too but yer just try new things you think you might enjoy, get a friend to force you to try them if you wont yourself.
Report
Reply
kissofinnocence (17056)
2008-10-20 13:37:14
If you commit suicide you are a loser... you are a quitter... AND YOU ARE SELFISH. Think about all of the people around you that care. Listen to some of these comments. Some of these people don't even know you but they care about you. My brother committed suicide when i was young. He left me behind to deal with the pain. He left my mother behind to deal with the pain. I have forgiven him now... but it took me a long, long time. I miss him dearly. I am glad that you have had a change of heart. Live, love, laugh.
Report
Reply
ArieChan (8513)
2008-10-26 23:45:26
Alright I'll tell you a story about myself. Back when I was in middle school I always asked myself because I was one depressive person why I still let myself live. I tried to kill myself, wanted to overdose. What I am seeing here with the fact that you have not committed the deed yet is that you are indeed depressed but not enough to commit suicide. I found a really awesome counselor. If your counselor/psychologist is making you feel uncomfortable fire him. Find a new one. You should have a friend type of relationship with a counselor. Start doing things that you were once interested in. If you can't stay in contact with your family, if your friends are depressive... Well ditch them. You will feel a lot of relief once you do. Find new friends, make friends at work, start talking to people on the street, start saying hi to people. Chat to people online. I know for me chatting to people (though it made me not have a life or whatever) helped me a lot because it seemed like I was talking to a lot of friends. If you are single find a girlfriend/boyfriend whatever you desire. Me, I got over my depressive state when I talked to a counselor who was a lot like a friend... and then I made friends outside of the counselor's office which in turn made it so then I didn't need to see my counselor again.
Report
Reply
bubbles08 (18165)
2008-12-01 18:42:53
well god is not dead he is a live watching us and he with us ecery momment in our life we just have to belive in him and not give up to easy!!! belive in yourself if your family dosent callyou try calling them mayb if you do it maybe it can be a change for you!! just stop thinking neggative about who you are and start thinking postative
Report
Reply
confused3 (18210)
2009-02-14 22:40:40
someone gave you this life for a reason, how dare you want to take it away
Report
Reply
fingersandknuckles (21004)
2009-03-16 03:21:00
This life is such a strange one, where we are all here and we don't know why, and if you leave, you're a quitter. I was told when I was 14 that suicide was a permanent solution to a temporary problem, by a therapist who was trying to take me out for coffee (for what, I don't know/want to know). Now I think suicide is a deep, personal choice and no one should be judged for it/it shouldn't be illegal. That said, there have been too many moments in my life where I was so glad I didn't kill myself so I could experience this one thing or that one thing, and I sensed a pattern, which is, that while I feel shitty for weeks, months even, I know it's going to be all right, or that I will have times in my life that are invaluable to me. I don't know if you feel the same way, I just thought I would give a personal glimpse of my journey with this life so far (I'm in my 20's).
Report
Reply
churbur (21140)
2009-03-21 22:41:16
Don't do it. Get help. Find what makes you happy and even if it's weird, just do it man.
Report
Reply
thirtycharactersisalot (21622)
2009-04-05 05:41:07
You mentioned that you're on opiates for pain.
Long term use of medicines like vicodin and percocet (these are the mild forms of opiate pain relief) can cause depression. TALK TO YOUR DOCTOR ABOUT ALTERNATIVE MEDICATION, things might get better just from this simple switch.

Another thing, its easier to find reasons to be unhappy than happy. If the people around you are negative influences in your life, spend less time with them. It's easy for us to say 'just change' from an outside third person perspective, things are more complicated than that. Find something you love to do, or maybe something you've always wanted to try, and go for it. What have you got to lose?
I sincerely hope things improve and I wish you good fortune.
Report
Reply
jellokatt (18285)
2009-04-15 23:37:17
it does get better. i swear. and a good portion of why you're feeling this way has to do with your meds.

the opiates are not going to help your mood unfortunately (and may very well be the reason you find yourself in this mental state right now). see if you can get weed instead (i'm actually being serious here. way less stressful on the body and on the mind... if it helps with the pain)
Report
Reply
thisisodd (22068)
2009-04-17 07:26:28
@: inside_out
very well put

i think your comment is the smartest on this list
Report
Reply
oskilover18 (22167)
2009-04-21 12:58:12
Please see a therapist
Report
Reply
see1253 (23210)
2009-05-22 19:26:06
Never give up. things do get better and medical attention does work, try seeing a different gp and get a referral to someone properly qualified. Good luck and keep those Bunnehs and budgies safe:)
Report
Reply
dnnirx (23630)
2009-05-29 23:43:32
i bet u are a great person, u cant let ppl around u make u feel like sh!t, we are here with a porpose...ure not less than the rest, put that in ur head...if u do that u might be missing the beautiful things that make life great!. Theres a lot of ppl out there with bigger problems, ppl that are alone in this world, with no family or anything, and that keeps then with strengh in their minds and decisions...so please...think about the great things that u have in urself and try to show it off to the world!!! ure awesome baby!
Report
Reply
tieweird (23668)
2009-05-31 04:27:26
Hey. i tried committing suicide once. hang in there. just find the light and love. theres always a little ;). dont kill urself it inflicts pain to others.
Report
Reply
NoFix_LawMix (23784)
2009-06-02 20:10:04
whats the point in dieing again? sure your life might not be the best right now, but does that mean it cant be better later? and if you trully think it sucks now, change your perspective of it and focus on something else, look at the possitives, start a hobby like painting or start excercising and yous hould feel better.
NFLM.
Report
Reply
russellnb (23816)
2009-06-03 16:03:31
You need to find something that gives your life happiness and meaning. Don't wait for others to do it.
The dull knife may have been God's way of telling you to look for your purpose
Report
Reply
hotchickie81 (24721)
2009-06-26 09:17:50
I know how you feel. I get suicidal thoughts like every day. they used to be much worse but then the docs put me on prozzak. it helps. i still think of it but i won't go through with it since i don't want to hurt my family & friends after i'm dead. so if you continue to think these thoughts and get worse maybe you should try some meds. they really do help!
Report
Reply
Rustin (24937)
2009-07-01 12:04:50
I have that type of personality. If i let myself go i would be mad or dead by now. But i decided to not let myself. I work my hardest at everything i can, i have started going to the gym and cooking more, and reading and listening to music, and trying to make friends, and im starting to feel better. You feel you have no purpose in life; so give yourself one. If you have truely had anough, you will do things to change it. If you cared anough. You may feel there is no point in doing so, but you wont feel like this when your happy. I would go off the meds because its only short term. You need to do things in your life.
Hypnotherapy was my best bet. It worked very well.
Dont just let yourself go. Everyone has the will power inside them, take it up and use it to save yourself.
Report
Reply
DrummerDude (25051)
2009-07-04 10:15:23
@: kissofinnocence
Whoa, whoa, whoa, even if you don't know your potential, God does. Even if you don't believe in him think about it. Your gonna take the easy way out of life. What about your family? When you kill yourself you kill a little of them. Be proactive, volunteer at a soup kitchen, go to church again volunteer there, change somebodys life! When I was younger I went on a thing call a Noise Project: Actions Speak Louder! We went to San Francisco, over there we went in the tenderloin and richmond (#3 on cities with highest murder ratings) We helped kids, people with HIV/AIDS, and gave and gave, it was AMAZING! If you volunteer it will change you life!
Report
Reply
nira123 (25156)
2009-07-11 03:37:54
YOU ARE EMO.
Report
Reply
nira123 (25156)
2009-07-11 03:40:31
IF YOU KILL YOURSLEF YOU WILL DIE. AND BE LOST FROM THE ADVENTURES LIFE HAS TO OFFER YOU.

I WOULD UNDERSTAND IF YOU WANTED TO KILL YOURSELF IF YOU WERE THOSE PARENTLESS MALNUTRICIONED CHILDREN WITH AIDS IN AFRICA....BUT AT LEAST THEY ARE STILL KEEPING HOPE IN LIFE.
Report
Reply
Dolly_the_sheep (26833)
2009-08-08 18:31:40
How selfish. Go out and help some old people or something. What a prick.

Theres innocent people constantly dying- of disease, starvation and war...yet no one laments them, or tries to help those who do not wish to die to live as there are those trying to make those who want to die live.
Report
Reply
awatcher (26918)
2009-08-13 10:42:01
I think a lof of ppl feel this way from time to time. Hard times, a death can bring the pain out. Just do not let it get to you. If it does please call these people first. Get help.

suicidehotlines.com/national.html
Report
Reply
dollpartz (28856)
2009-09-22 23:17:47
Wow, what a bunch of nice folks you all are. It is a sad sad day when we are encouraging another human being to end their own life.

Hun, suicide is a PERMANENT solution to a TEMPORARY problem. Please seek the help you need as well as be honest with your friends and family about how your feeling. You need a support group. Get out into the world and look past the surface, see things for the real beauty that it truly is. Write in a journal. Go for a walk. Turn on upbeat music. Just do something when you get into these "moods". And always call for help! Please don't do the unthinkable. So many love you dearly, and life is unpredictable, you would miss out on so so much. Take care and good luck to you!
Report
Reply
Layla_nerd27 (29205)
2009-09-30 12:47:34
You really should just try to think about the good things in life i mean we all have troubles right? Some of course worse than others but its really something we all have to put up with! n_n
Report
Reply
purplefairyfaith (29212)
2009-09-30 16:09:00
wow obviously the people saying to go die or that your selfish don't understand what it feels like to be in that position and are all pricks that need a major attitude adjustment i say try to get some help or it will be a life long battle, i myself struggle with severe depression and the world seems dim at time but you have to make it your own and find a way to get through the day, it'll be alright things have a way of working out
Report
Reply
The_Truth_Hurts_Doesnt_It (29477)
2009-10-07 14:01:59
"I used to thank God for my life but my faith is all but disappeared."

Congratulations, you've broken away from the lies of religion and are starting to see reality. That is something to rejoice about. I am happy for you and your life has JUST BEGUN. Don't throw it away now. Seek more truths in life.

If your life sucks, do something DIFFERENT than you have been doing or else it will continue to suck from doing the SAME things and expecting a DIFFERENT result.

Don't kill yourself because life can change so fast that something good might have been going to happen to you soon after you killed yourself.
Report
Reply
chunkybongo (18981)
2009-10-07 20:53:51
You sound like you want to commit suicide because you're just too bored or something. What about those guys who jumped out of the top of the burning world trade center to avoid burning to death? They chose slamming into the concrete from 100 stories above as opposed to frying alive. Take another look at your life and I guarantee you'll find something worth living for. Don't take the awesome gift of being a homo sapien for granted.
Report
Reply
sovlover (6461)
2009-10-10 00:31:43
I know how it feels to be depressed, but I find it pretty sad that the worst things to happen in your life are bad news bits and people being sick. That happens everyday. I think you should begin to appreciate what you have... make a list of things that upset you and things that make you happy and you'll soon see that the good thing list will tower over the bad. You're not in a life threatening mind state if you're living to feed ducks at a park... but if you truly believe you still need help then tell someone who's actually in your life. Nobody can help you on here unfortunately.
Report
Reply
MzBeck123 (24128)
2009-10-12 14:15:12
It sucks you had to post this on here with all these jerks who responded. Don't kill yourself. Just because things aren't how you want them now, doesn't mean they won't change for the better. You sound young.....maybe what you need to do is find something that actually makes you happy. A hobby, a charity, something. It's hard being depressed. I go through it a lot.....but it will get better. And yeah, they will probably miss you a lot if you leave.
Report
Reply
Nushki (30566)
2009-11-01 05:43:59
rather go to some arb country and live a life of solitude. if u really don give a crap bout anything then imo jus take off...what's the worst that can happen. esp in regard to killing urself?
Report
Reply
harachi (22902)
2009-11-28 16:37:46
Hey it's your life, and I'm sorry you feel unhappy. I used to get quite depressed and entertain suicidal thoughts daily thankfully it hasn't happened in a long time. I didn't find God, or take loads of medication or anything, I just kind of came out of it and my attitude to a lot of things just changed. I can't really explain why, but it's the best thing thats ever happened me. I am aware that it could back to me at any time, but I feel mentally equipped to deal with it.
I'd urge you to not take the easy way out for 2 reasons - 1) it will absolutely devastate your family and friends, and 2) you only get one short life and then it's the big long nothing. People can come out of depression without ever having to rely on medication or treatment. I guess my advice is just try to be strong
Report
Reply
Farfromnormal (34676)
2010-01-13 17:02:07
find a doctor you do like. Find hobbies you like to do. find the things that puts a smile on your face and do them. become closer with your family. buy more pets. meet new people. and try and connect with god again. dont do it because god wont forgive you suicide is the worst sin you can make.if you try to kill yourself then you are being selfish because think about all the people who had a whole life ahead of them but dident get to finish it.They would probably do anything to have more time on earth. life is a gift. i was in your shoes once and time will pass everything will get better.
Report
Reply

Sorry, you need to be signed in to comment.

Click here to sign in or register.