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Why does my boyfriend wank over porn...im asleep

My boyfriend wanks over porn on the internet or watching it on TV. I am in upstairs in bed when he does this i have children so im tired and wake up at 6am every morning for them.

I have never actually walked into the room when he's doing it, i think this is because if he hears me walking down the stairs hes got time to stop and switch channels!

I only know because I was up on the landing peering down when he came to the hallway to get a wetwipe off the shelf with his penis dangling out and cum on his palm. I look for the wetwipe every morning now!

On the internet he has typed in specific names and descriptive words to look for the right video to watch ie: devine(pornstar),fart,squirting etc.

He more or less does this every night. we do have sex tho but im not getting enough to make me feel like im still loved and attractive. we used to have great sex and now hes selfish and doesnt really care like he did about me not releasing my frustration and climaxing.

I am so upset that he does this especially when im just a walk up the stairs. is this normal? or is there something wrong with me and he doesnt want me every night? i would watch porn with him but its like hes almost embarrased!
I dont know yet if he is using webcams i dont know how to find that one out! its like hes cheating on me that is exactly how i feel, so everyday im in a bad mood with him and i have confronted him but we argued and had a massive fight with no resolving my issue that hurts me so bad.
I do wish though like many others have said that all pornstars should be killed they are hoes yet if us 'normal' women cheat we are the ho "yet your happy to wank over one!! "

Please help!!! am i being silly? I love sex but i want him to come to me more insted of hiding and doing this. Oh and hes not really a great person to confront he finds it soooo hard to talk!!

I would love some male advice or answers as to what they think this is? and women please be here for me too!!! are you going through the same

Thanx guys
x
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Comments (10)
RockyBalboa (21283)
2009-03-26 01:58:58
Okay. I am 20 years old so it might be different. My gf is always willing to do it but the fact of the matter is she is, in my opinion, to picky. The way she wants everything to be done makes it seem more like a process and takes the fun out of it. Instead of just going with the flow, the minute I do something unnattractive or I say something funny she gets mad and ends it. I find it much easier to just go online and jerk off because it makes it easier. I don't know if your like her but if you do what she does then I'm gonna guess your man feels the same way.
Another thing is he could be bored. Maybe role-playing or kinky stuff is what's needed for you guys to keep it fresh. I'm sorry if this doesn't explain much but I just thought I'd offer some advice.
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messenger (19327)
2009-05-03 05:14:05
@: RockyBalboa
thanx for your reply. Im not how your girlfrien is, i will say though that the one thing i do say alot is dont touch me. he still touches me but he has finally spoke and said that it hurts him and why put up with the headache from me when going online is easier. i actually dont know why i say it and ive been searching for that answer for a while....how do you feel when she ends it? you must feel hurt also...is going online some sort of revenge in a way maybe?? im sure thats off putting and makes you feel rejected. I never start dong stuff with him im really scared of rejection!!! ive dressed up an that was ok but i know bhes still wanking....he can seriuosly f off if he is guna do that lol! im not horrible
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BarbieDoll (23300)
2009-05-22 07:01:41
@: messenger
sounds like im in the same boat as you. I actually walked into the bedroom and my husband was all flustered. Turned out he had just finished himself off. He admitted that he does it quite abit. I find it hard to go to bed early, i end up just laying there awake, so i stay up late. I have just turned 30, and have become really horny. My husband is 8 years older than me, and he is not really into it much now. He says its because i'm at my peak, and because hes almost 40, hes at a low point. He knows that if he was to say to me that he wanted sex, that i would jump to the occasion, but instead, he prefers to wank. I don't know why. I don't have great self esteem at the best of times, so to find this out 2 nights ago has really hit me. Ive taken the blame upon myself. I feel really fat and ugly at the moment, and feel that i repulse him so much that he prefers to wank then to make love to me. I feel really down, but he just doesn't seem to understand.
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janivablueeyes (24389)
2009-06-18 10:22:33
Ooooooh my god i really thought i was the only one!! i could have actually written the initial story, i even feel kinda guilty that i check each morning, to the stage that i wrip the corner off the kitchen roll & check to see if it has been used in the morning!!!
& i lay awake upstairs & cant sleep & wait untill it goes quiet & sneak to the top of the stairs to see if i can hear anything!
i have confronted him about it & he just tells me to shut up cause it embarrases him & trys to tell me that it is normal, but i now find that sex is awkward cause all i can think about is that he's thinking about porn that he's watched instead of me!!! especially if he asks me to do something a bit different cause i expext its from something tat he's been watching!!
he's due home any sec so i have to go but hearing im not the only one has really helped!! in a strange kinda way!!!
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messenger (19327)
2009-07-03 12:12:15
@: BarbieDoll
thank you barbie doll and janiva....i am not saying this in a mean way but i am too glad i am not the only one. last week i stayed awake and too at the top of the stairs waited to see him run to get a tissue and i aught him for the first time red handed!!! i wanted to cry, my whole body was shaking and felt achy where i was so angry with him i had gone to bed like 15 minutes before hand but quietly sneaked to the top of the stairs(cant believe that janiva did the same what is that private investigators) to try and hear anything....all i got from him was if i want to pull my dick out and play with myself then i will, be thankful i don't go out and find some good pussy. lol this is because i refuse to let him touch me now until he stops doing it, if he e leaves me then he leaves me, i am not going to stop him as he doesn't make me feel sexy or want me to get pleased...he would prefer to watch a women getting pleased then please me!!!! barbie doll...have you masturbated at all or thought of doing this before you go to bed, id say it is easier for women to masturbate as they don't have to watch porn. well i have started to just before i go to bed so that when he does want to have sex i really refuse cause im sorted!! leaves him questioning and im finding he wants to have sex a lot more now but still has a wank obviously, i think its just in there nature and i wish i had the power to change a man but i don't believe anyone does unless your Angelina Jolee. when it comes to porn it really knocks my confidence and when he has sex i find he closes his eyes a lot of the time what the hell is that about i could actually go out tomorrow night and pull like 3 guys so i am sexy but what is going on with him??!!
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frankyB (25133)
2009-07-06 09:45:45
im a boy and i mean i used to do the same and my girl friend got really mad and she even fretend to dump me so one day i just thought about it and well its sort of an addictive thing so every time i was on a computer i would type in the word porn in the search bar and just leave it there anytime i was on just to no that its there but edge myself to not do it at the same time. So praps you can get ur boyfriend to do the same
PS dont worry we dont think you are un-attractive cos i bet ur not, we just cant control are self
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messenger (19327)
2009-07-08 13:23:12
@: frankyB
thank you very much for your reply it is so nice to have a males input...it is also so nice that you have tried to stop watching porn so that you can continue this relationship. some girls are fine with there man waking but the few out there that really hate it.....REALLY hate it and i would too threaten my man with it but is harder when kids are involved. i guess if he treated me how i like then i wouldn't want to catch him out but I'm actually obsessed with it now.... being in a mood with him gives me more attention than when I'm not so i guess I'm in a habit of it. weird i know.
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janivablueeyes (24389)
2009-07-25 09:22:24
Hello again!
iv actually spoken to my other half about it again since, i waited until one night when we was gettin on really well & havin a laugh & just casually brought it up & told him how much it really upsets me, how i sit up until all hours of the night to go to bed with him cause i know if i leave him alone downstairs i know what he will get up to & he was actually quite understanding!! dont know how long it will last but he has promised me that he will not do it while i am upstairs in bed, i mean he has 2 days off a week while i am at work s o its not like he doesnt get time to do it while i am away! its not like im telling him not to just that i am really offended when he does it right under my nose!!
try it maybe?? not saying it will work but its kinda helped me..... so far so good!
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FollowBoy (27056)
2009-08-13 13:32:55
Just a quick input here. I'm only 13 year old boy, and hasn't been involved inb either side. Maybe he enjoys to jerk off then he does sex. Why not, instead of offering or intending to have sex. Give him a handjob. One day send him out somewhere. Get the house or romantic and as he walks in, give him a smirk and nod your head toward the tele. There have some porn on. Try to convince him to 'show you how it works'. Then try get in on it. rub your hand on his balls. Kiss his neck. Then take control.

Hope this helps ;)
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Inter (20716)
2009-08-21 12:49:56
Id say u need to spice up ur sex life with him. Try something new for him, dress up, roleplay, if he has any fetishes find out and use that too.
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