Anxiety in public

55% Normal

Today I decided to go shopping and got all dressed up. I left the house and drove to the shopping center and right when I got there I got anxious. I haven't really been out by myself (for the hell of it) in awhile. It took twenty minutes to get there so I couldn't just drive back because my roommate would think I was an idiot. So I walked around anxious as hell like a dumbass, couldn't bring myself to walk into any of the stores and then left. I thought I would be okay but I wasn't.

I even find it difficult to take my dog outside and dread it on a daily basis. I'm uncomfortable in places I'm not familiar with (which is almost everywhere besides home and work) or where I don't know who will be around. I'm not a recluse. I work and I do hang out at a few places by myself but I always have this underlying feeling of dread or that something bad might happen at any moment so I have to be on guard.

People have said I just have to keep facing my fears and it will get better but it hits a plateau. I can go to work but my anxiety levels almost always at a 10. I can sit in a coffee shop but I sit there rigidly, paranoid that I'm being watched so I constantly peek over my shoulder to calm myself down. I can drive but I dread red lights where the person next to me could be looking at me or I constantly flinch at anything I perceive could go wrong.

is it normal that I can't get over this fear?

Voting Results

55% Normal

Based on 83 votes (46 yes)

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Comments ( 21 )

[Old Memory]

11 years ago

You are as your thoughts revolve around.

What are you thinking when you walk into these places? If the eye is dark then so is the soul. Any outward change (you in public) has to begin first with an inward one (your thoughts).

"My thoughts"

Yes. It seems insignificant but much of what's truly important in life can't be touched or seen.

Control what your mind thinks on and you'll find your perception changes for the better.

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- Mando
  
  11 years ago
  
  I agree - get some help from a psychologist/therapist trained in proven therapies for dealing with fears and phobias.
  
  You have fears and anxieties - not a psychosis.
  
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NeuroNeptunian

11 years ago

It sounds as if you may need to see a mental health professional. This is not normal and may require a degree of psychiatric treatment. You have nothing to be ashamed of, the brain is a delicate organ and to develop a chemical imbalance that doesn't correct itself isn't entirely uncommon. Go get help from a professional.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  Hey, I went to the doctor today. I figured I'd come back and tell people how it went since sometimes I wonder, "What ever happened to the OP?" He didn't want to give me a diagnosis on the first visit but he thinks I'm likely to develop full blown schizophrenia.. :( I'm scared. (My mom has paranoid schizophrenia.) So he put me on the lowest dose of Zyprexa and I have to see him again next week before he ups the dose. That's pretty much it. :)
  
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funkyfreshlad

11 years ago

I suffer from the same issue. I walked out of a movie theater after fifteen minutes of sitting down. I was there with a group of 5 friends, they were all confused as to where I went and why. I walked accross the parking lot to a bar and got hammered alone. I felt soo much more @ ease. I dread going to the grocery store and my college classes, but I'm dealing with it. Alcohol is not a good substitution in dealing with my anxities, but I couldn't take the pressure. There was too many people in that building. I know its dumb but I felt like I could feel everyone staring @ me eventhough that wasn't case. I learned that I got it from my dad. My dad is very recluse. He didn't even go to my graduation party because of his anxieties. I understood why he couldn't be there and I don't hold it against him. I hope we both learn to deal with our anxities and not let it control us. Cheers mate!

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peeweekid

11 years ago

I get randomly anxious at random points of the day as well (:

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Tarkio

11 years ago

Hey at least your getting out there by yourself! it is a strength to feel good about being on your own. Some peope can't do anything alone, but they have sisters, a mother or a best friend from high school (even if they don't like them) to do everything with them. Sometimes this makes other people who do things alone feel inadequate. The worst is when I see women jogging together. Come on!

The people with these "fall back" people may think your anxieties are not normal. But let them try to be in a a new foreign place, or to be somebody who has to do things on their own "by themselves" and they may feel differently.

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audsam

11 years ago

I'm anxious just like you

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Sig_45

11 years ago

are u on drugs? I felt like that sometimes when I was high af on Mary, if not maybe u have Anxiety problems talk to a doctor

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- BluntsRolled
  
  11 years ago
  
  Same here, when I get lifted I feel like this sometimes too.
  
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  - Sig_45
    
    11 years ago
    
    had to put it down cus probation feels good tho more ambitious n shit get alot
    more done I was a heavy user.
    
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JuneB

11 years ago

It sucks, but I don't think it's abnormal. I always have to force myself to leave the house...are you close to anyone? Just having one person who you feel comfortable around can make a world of difference when it comes to overcoming anxiety. Good luck :)

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emilydoll

11 years ago

I think it's very normal actually

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emilydoll

11 years ago

I'm like that, so I avoid those situations

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CarloP

11 years ago

No it's not "normal" so to say. I don't vote anything you need a psychiatrist for as normal. I had the same problem, but when going to nightclubs, I would wonder if I look stupid doing certain things, and felt like people were judging me by how I'm standing and how I'm dressed. No I'm on anti anxiety meds, and a whole lot of other meds for other reasons, so no, it's not normal, which doesn't mean it can't happen to anyone.

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[Old Memory]

11 years ago

take a huge dump....

...or try something more useful............

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Ldizzy1234

11 years ago

You might need some kind of anxiety pills. Try talking to someone about this. A professional. It doesn't seem normal to be this way all the time.

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Short4Words

11 years ago

I agree with Neuro, your anxiety doesn't seem completely rational. When I had REALLY bad anxiety, I was worried about people judging me, based on how crappy I looked, or my lack of social skills, or that they just wouldn't like. I also have a bit of a problem, eating alone in public, but I think that is natural. Food is commonly eaten together. However, these all come from a rational fear of being rejected, not that danger is an irrational fear, but you've taken it to higher level that it needs to be. I was surprised when you said even walking the dog was difficult. Maybe you should start there.

Is it talking to people you are worried about, or just imminent danger? Is it just a physical uneasiness as soon as you go outside? Let me know.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  11 years ago
  
  Well the reasons vary and it also depends on time of day. Early mornings are the easiest because it's light out and there aren't many people about. The afternoons and evenings are what I hate most. There are too many things going on that I get anxious or nervous. I'm usually okay if there's one person walking around but once there's any more than that including cars driving around,I don't know, it feels overwhelming...like they're distractions from something bad happening that I could have noticed if there wasn't so much commotion...idk if that makes sense. I guess I always feel like I have to be aware of EVERYTHING going on around me to feel comfortable.
  
  At night is a whole other deal. I use to be okay but now I'm frightened of taking my dog out at night. I feeling like someone is following me and sneaking up on me (you know when you get that feeling right before someone walks up behind you?? That's the feeling I get except no one is there.) I've come sprinting back to my apartment out of sheer terror.
  
  Other minor reasons are having to talk to someone when I don't want to, my dog barking at other dogs or at cars, a dog running up to my dog and my dog freaking out, (which has happened numerous times) someone sneaking up on me (I know that sound stupid lol) and sometimes just being seen by people or running into them.
  
  I'm actually like this at home too. For instance if I'm watching tv and my roommate walks into the room and I either A) Don't notice or B) Notice but haven't physically seen her with my own eyes yet and she says something I jump.
  
  Sorry it was so long and thank you everyone!
  
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  - Short4Words
    
    11 years ago
    
    I think you should see a psychologist about this because I am tempted to ask why you feel like each day might be the day you die. Do you feel like divine judgement is coming, or you deserve it? Or do you just think not being careful enough is going to get you killed?
    
    I would if I were you, try walking your dog in the morning, and if someone comes by, just smile at them or say hello, most people don't really want to talk to strangers either. But you can't be scared of a little conversation. Try to be open to the idea of being with people.
    
    Another thing, I'm not sure if its your view on things, or just your anxiety talking, but you have to start trusting people more. If someone is walking behind you, do something and let them pass at least. But don't run for the hills.
    
    I really think you need to be more used to being around people. You seem disconnected and untrusting of other people, and you don't need to be. I understand from a distance things may seem unclear, they were for me. Like I said, start with a psychologist or any one who doesn't use medication. You need to deal with this at your core.
    
    Msg me back if you feel like it.
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      11 years ago
      
      Hey I'm back! :) Read my reply to Neuro.
      
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Anxiety in public