Bob and i...iin?

Bob and I are on pretty good terms. He visits once a month and visits are not usually a surprise (he gives subtle clues). I get a bit anxious and emotional the week before he shows up, but I'm usually relieved by his visit. He does hurt me, both emotionally and also physically on the first day of his visit most months. My only problem is that he stays too long. Four days would be ideal, but he stays for seven. He always shows up on the weekends/my days off so that is good that I don't have to worry about him showing up while I'm out and about, but he does have a bad habit of showing up on holidays, which can sometimes interfere with my plans - last month he showed up on Christmas and stayed until New Years! Men have trouble understanding him and they often blame him for my problems, but women, on the other hand, usually know exactly what I'm going through with him. Bob will also visit my female friends sometimes when he visits me. I only need to know how to cut these visits short, if anyone has any advice because, while I do appreciate him and understand that the visits are essential to both of us, I simply cannot bear his presence for longer than four days. Should I switch from tampons to pads? Would that relieve me sooner, do you think?

Voting Results
73% Normal
Based on 26 votes (19 yes)
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Comments ( 25 )
  • Fall_leaves

    Nope, it doesn't matter what you use, bob stays as long as he likes. Pads might be less irritating the first couple days if you get cramps like me.

    When bob visits me he stays for a week and a half..

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    • That is a horribly long stay. I feel more fortunate now, thank you. I might try the pads, for I get the sense Bob is trying to climb through my stomach and out of my butthole lately.

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      • Fall_leaves

        Haha, I passed out at work once thanks to bob. If the pain gets to be too much I definitely think you should talk to your doctor. My cramps started getting exponentially worse as I've got older.

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  • Avant-Garde

    This post of yours is missing vital aspects to the situation! I am slightly confused as to what "bob" really is… Is "bob" code name for your period? Is your period so intense that it has spun off into a corporal identity known as "bob"? Perhaps, "bob" is nothing more than Toxic Shock Syndrome?

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    • My apologies. BOB is an acronym for Boobs Of Bloat, Bitch Off Beat or Beast On Board. Basically, a code name for my period and somewhat of an alternate identity, yes.

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      • Avant-Garde

        You must be commended for your creativity. All I refer to as is "The accursed time of the month" or, I guess, "T.A.T.O.T.M". But he comes by so rarely and often when he does, he doesn't seem to have much of a kick.

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  • yesnomaybeso

    I laughed hahaha. It took me a while to understand haha. My bob hurts me a lot too, and he comes on the worst days, i hate him!! I wish he would tell me before coming... :( Sometimes I wish I was a guy and I didn't have to deal with any kind of Bobs.

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  • If I have a vacation coming up, I keep taking my birth control pills, without a break, until the vacation is done. My doctor advised me that it's safe for me to do this, but you might want to check with your doctor before you try it.

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    • Bob doesn't like me to use birth control pills. He says they make him feel funny. He does like to toke it up, however.

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      • Good, toking is great! (in my humble opinion)

        It's too bad Bob doesn't like b.c. pills, though. He sounds like a high - maintenance sort of dude. :/

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        • They make him go crazy. Last time he took them he made me cry for two hours and then black out later that day.

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          • Avant-Garde

            You should put a sock in him!

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  • Avant-Garde

    Or, perhaps, he represents your desire to get in touch with your masculine side.

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  • You didn't give enough information about why it is essential for him to be there at all.

    If he hurts you, you shouldn't deal with him at all.
    I don't understand why you let this guy over.

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    • yesnomaybeso

      Maybe she can't say no to Bob, maybe Bob will always come... or maybe Bob will get tired of visiting if she is ever pregnant.. or when she turns old, very old. Oh, Bob is mean. Bad Bob.

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      • Avant-Garde

        That bastard has no since of loyalty! The least he could do is pay for her retirement and cradle her on her deathbed.

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        • yesnomaybeso

          I agree hahah

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    • It's just a reproduction thing. I have tried telling him to leave, but he insists it's a natural part of life.

      :)

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  • Pika-girl

    I have my "Bob" this week... I also had mine on New Year's.

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  • JayPr'zBaddest

    For a minute thought Bob was an imaginary friend. Lol

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    • Pika-girl

      Me too.

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    • I'm surprised by how many other women name their period Bob!

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      • yesnomaybeso

        My period doesn't have a name. If it did, I bet it would be something ugly, mean and a swear word.

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  • kelili

    Haha! I was wondering who Bob was the whole post long. I once had a boyfriend who's name was Bob.

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    • Oh, I could never make Bob my boyfriend. He would be far too invasive.

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