Building a chicken coop

Me and my friend built a chicken coop when we were bout 12-15, we got permissions to build our chicken coop on some rich dudes land across the street he owned like 100 acres. Another kid lived down the street asked if he could keep some of his chickens there too we said yeah sure. This dude was like boomhaur he was raised in Alabama somewhere and had a really thick accent where you couldnt understand half what he was saying. And he'd say the weirdest shit. One day he started plotting to steal the landowners goat. He said something like "Bout thinkin to get me some of my pa's double twisted rope, er triple twisted, one er da otherrr, and Im bout thinkin im'o go cross this street and rope me one of em goats and spray paint it. Owner aint gonna know its his goat keep it up'er in the chicken coop."

Dude was so fuckin funny. He grew up in some backwoods country environment but then his parents moves into some suburban neighborhood. He'd dress like a cowboy to school everyday and was so fuckin out of place. Everyone loved the guy because he was so unintentionally hilarious. We actually made a song about him back then it went something like

"I wanna go fishin on a boat..
(On a boooaaat)

But I was too busy paintin a goat
(Paintin a gooooat)"

I hate yankees 1
I hate yankees 3
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Comments ( 7 )
  • Somenormie

    I gotta choose the first option I hate Yankees.

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    • Great choice.

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  • Boojum

    Gotta wonder why the guy wanted to steal a goat, disguise it and keep it in the chicken coop.

    I mean, I try to avoid stereotyping people, but...

    Backwoods adolescent Alleybama guy + goat = potential serious weirdness.

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    • I swear to god he had a giant john deer tractor in his yard. Only problem was his yard was 1/4th an acre. He had no use for it. He shoulda had his own tv show. Also his whole front of his yard was a corn patch in a residential neighborhood. He made his own little stand where you could park in his driveway and buy his tomatoes, peaches, and corn. He'd sit out there and wave as you drove by 😂

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      • Boojum

        That sounds really funny. I wouldn't have problems with a neighbour like that as long and he and his coon dog weren't out at all hours of the night trying to tree a varmint in someone's front yard.

        Do you think it was kinda performative? Like he was playing up his hickness because he liked the attention?

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        • There was a few times I thought maybe he was milking it a little. But he came off as not being self aware enough to pull it off so well, he was kind of slow.

          I remembered him from kindergarden he hadnt moved to alabama yet and he had a normal local southern accent not too thick. I believe his mother lost custody of him when he was still in kindergarden and his older brother and they went to his grandparents farm until about 9th grade and he came back like that. I dont remember him good enough from kindergarden.

          His older brother was also kinda like that but was more of a mechanic/criminal he sold drugs and was always with the druggies, but he himself was always into all the country shit. He competed in the fair with his chickens and watermelons and shit. He was a magnet for girls also was a good looking guy.

          There was quite a bit of country ppl in our school but they were from the other side of town and most of them went to the other highschool the one I went to. He was smack down in a residential street. He was well liked though. Knew how to do everything. You could drop him in the woods somewhere in the amazon and he'd probably get by just fine lol

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    • LloydAsher

      Step up from a sister tho

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