Did i accidentally pressure my gf?

29% Normal
5 Comments

When me and my ex gf was still dating, I remember while were making out I would always ask her if I can put my hand where. She would avoid straight answers so for a while I thought she was just uncomfortable and kind of stopped making out. Later on we started again and she seemed really into it, which confused me. It was only after that I realised she never gives straight answers for ANYTHING. She never decides and asks me to take the lead. So one day while were making out I asked her if I can put my hand on certain areas, which she replied with the same embarrassed silence and said something along the lines of not yet. So while were making out, my hand was around her waist and so as things got more touchy and steamy it naturally went up, towards the breast, and after wards I apologised and asked if it was ok and she said yes, and since then we frequented the realms of second base. But now I can't tell. She did explicitly say she wasn't ready, and I didn't listen. I feel like such a piece of shit. What should I do? It's been bothering me a lot, and am wondering if I should apologise properly, albeit pretty late.

Voting Results
29% Normal
Based on 7 votes (2 yes)
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Comments ( 5 )
  • Imafriendyrock
    2 years ago

    Lol yeah see that's the problem with all this consent bullshit. Her vagina is drying up with every verbal request you give. Id just go for it and if she doesnt want it she will say no and you stop. Or if she acts funny then stop. I wouldnt keep giving verbal requests every few seconds thats just me tho.

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  • Tommythecaty
    2 years ago

    Christ, stop being such a pussy.

    What is happening to youth today.

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  • idolomantis
    2 years ago

    It sounds like you didn't pressure her at all. She was extremely shy and she didn't know how to give a straight answer. It does happen. tmi I know, but I have been that shy girl and the guy I was with was mostly understanding, but also fucked up enough to get angry at me inappropriately. Confused enough to push my limits and be completely oblivious to it as well, even after I quite literally physically assaulted him on multiple occasions, once to the point where I drew blood by scratching the complete fuck out of him. Yeah, he definitely listened that time. He'd never actually do anything THAT fucked up to me, but the psychological trauma is lasting nonetheless.

    But no, you definitely didn't pressure her judging by what you wrote. She might be fragile minded enough to let other people convince her that you did, sadly enough. That happens too...

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      2 years ago

      thats the thing. If she doesn't give a straight answer maybe then I shouldn't have done anything at all. I really regret it now, and it sucks we never got to properly talk about it because she was shy and got embarrassed talking about the sexual side of the relationship. I should have nonetheless, I think.

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      • idolomantis
        2 years ago

        You can't change the past. Ask yourself this, and give yourself a genuine response, one that isn't tainted by self-doubt and other such feelings: Did I want to actually hurt or harm this person? Did I TRULY know that this was wrong? Also, was is it even wrong in the first place?(probably not but idk)

        I strongly suspect that the correct answer is no, personally. I can't read your mind, but that is my personal opinion.

        If there's a different answer there, which is possible though I do doubt it, then ask yourself another question: What circumstances was my life at the time? Who taught me what? What kind of drugs was I on and why?

        Patience and time young...person. Individual. Whatever.

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