Do i have an eating disorder?

Yes I think so, Ive struggled with restrictive eating habits like yours for years.

It definitely sounds like some kind of eating disorder and if see a nutritionist helped you before then you should go again. The average woman needs 2000 calories to maintain the current weight or 1500 to loose a pound a week. A man needs 2500 to maintain or 2000 to loss a pound a week. You should definitely try to eat more.

I think anyone who calorie-counts probably has an issue with food. If they do it obsessively, set a very specific goal for calorie intake which must be hit every day, and they know the precise number of calories in everything they ordinarily eat, then they definitely have a problem.

Interesting how you say you eat 1,200 calories a day so you "don't damage [your] body too much". In other words, you know that this level of energy intake is harming you, but you've decided that it's an amount of damage you find acceptable.

Say one of your friends had an obsession with blood, and they told you they were slicing an artery open every evening to watch it spurt. Would them reassuring you that they weren't draining more blood than their body could replace in twenty-four hours make you believe that they didn't have a problem?

Think about that, and then explain to yourself how you can believe for a moment that you don't have a seriously fucked-up attitude towards food and eating.

The truth is that you have no idea of the true amount of damage that your self-imposed malnutrition is doing to you own body. It's completely impossible for you to know what effect starving yourself now will have ten, twenty or even more years down the line.

My wife is Dutch, and her father was a child living in The Netherlands during WWII. Malnutrition was rife in the final winter of the war, with people being reduced to eating tulip bulbs and all sorts of other crap with minimal or no nutritive value. The health of people who were young during that period has been followed through their lives, and they have been found to suffer from all sorts of long-term health issues. Many of the problems have no obvious linkage to starvation in their youth, and yet they were clearly caused by a few months of very poor nutrition.

As far as I'm concerned, everyone has the right to starve themselves or kill themselves by whatever other means they choose. It's their life and their body. Everyone also has the right to tell themselves whatever lies they want to believe. In your case, it's that you don't have an eating disorder. The fact that you do is as obvious as your ribcage.