Empty inside, like i have no soul

I feel empty inside, like I have no serious interests and nothing makes me happy. I dont really think that I feel emotions, maybe I have just made myself believe that I do.

I can't connect to anybody except my girlfriend and even then it feels like since getting together I've just taken an interest in the things that she's into. Same thing happened with my best friend and now I hardly see him and dont feel that close at all even though we had such a good relationship.

We've been going out now for nearly 4 years and I'm scared that I've been pretending to myself that I'm happy but really I'm not... scared that it's going to hurt her so badly but also afraid to let go of our relationship because I'd miss her so much.

When I talk to people if it's superficial I am fine, but any kind of lasting relationships with other people are usually really hard because I find it so difficult to relate and I can't concentrate on anything to any great extent.

I feel like I just live in the moment and a lot of things that I do are self destructive.
I am going into therapy in the new year, and hope that I can last until then, but sometimes I just get filled up with despair and hopelessness.

To be honest, I'm scared that I've got some kind of personality disorder. Is this normal (lol)

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Based on 339 votes (172 yes)
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Comments ( 13 )
  • IveGotBallsOfSteal

    You would excel in a corporate environment.

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  • PunkZombie

    You might want to see a therapist.

    Just don't freak yourself out about it too much. I have the same issue with people. Sometimes I just want to be alone because everything seems fake.

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  • Nomorefuckingusernames

    Mate,I feel like that a lot it gets excruciating sometimes. But there is love in world. The fact that you are here shows you are worried/concerned and that's an emotion. Laughter is the best medicine for me when I feel like this it really takes the edge off. Have Faith.

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  • lovespugs

    I feel the same way. I a mental breakdown 2 yrars ago and haven't been able to get back to my "normal: self. I feel like is changed me dramatically. Into an empty person who is doing things to try and be happy but iit doesn't work. I am going to try a therapist. Antidepressants made me crazy and just worsen the issue. Hope you get better good luck.

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  • its called borderline personality disorder(welcome to my world)

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  • Tilmake

    Why is it when every time someone thinks they're lost in life they have to turn to "God". I had the exact same feelings, you are bored in life. I bet it's because you see your girlfriend way too much and have no time for your friends. This is bad you need to see your friends and she needs to see her own friends. Find something you like and don't be half assed about it. Go do random things. If she sooks about you seeing your friends get rid of her. If you keep doing this you will only get worse. I had to get our of my 3 year relationship because of it.

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  • despair.killz

    Okay, I feel EXACTLY like that! I have no emotions and everything that your going through.. IM GOING THROGH. worst of all I can concentrate... like I can think and I cant understand much! Like if i say thank you i try to think "what does that mean?" it is soooooooo hard for me to understand. also i have been talking to some "ghosts" and idk... i used to believe that i talk to ghosts through a ouiji board.. BUT ITS A PSYCHOLOGICAL PROBLEM! sigh! I FEEL YOU! YOUR NOT ALONE! I WILL PRAY FOR U AND ME AS WELL!

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  • JavaJones

    Sounds familiar, I feel the same way. Like the only emotion I actually feel is guilt. Usually guilt over the fact that I have no interest in my friends, family, or partner.
    I can't figure it out, I literally have withdrawn into my own private hell. It's getting worse now, the person I've been dating and living with has been away for months for work. It's just me.
    Work and home, I don't have the energy or desire to do anything else. Even taking the dog for a walk seems like such a chore.
    I tried a therapist, thought maybe I had depression, but he says it something more serious and that he wants me to start some group, which doesn't appeal to me at all. He said I have trouble connecting and developing relationships. I had a really hard childhood pretty much put the blame on that and my parents. People disappoint you enough you stop having faith in them.
    I'm stuck, been over 5 years now and I can't figure it out. Or make myself care enough to do something about it. I hate it. Therapy only seems to work for those who can't think for themselves, everything they told me I already knew, or suspected.
    I know that doesn't give u much help, but hey you're not the only one...good luck man, let me know if u find a solution.

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  • leahquestions

    friend- you do have feelings and emotions, you recognize you're not happy. you love your girlfriend but afraid to move forward and will miss her... think about how and what to say to her, try new things together . You sound like you need to find yourself and that happens to people of all ages, believe me.... There are many who feel more comfortable to be light with people as not to get close and then there are others who tell all and don't care... If you can't concentrate you may have ADD which is what I recently found out about myself... coffee-- cafiene of any type helps tremendously..make a wish list of how you'd like to be then try it.. It never hurts to try. The despair and hopelessness I'm afraid comes to all at one time or another,personaltiy traits or problems can arise also at any age... chin up and open up to your best friend, your girlfriend .. you can go see a therapist but go with your heart .. good luck

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  • opensky

    Hello there,
    This kind of feeling occurs to people who have real tendency to find the truth of this life.

    Usually these people start to lose intrest in everything and nothing can make them happy. Not only that but most of the times things that bring some kind of happiness to others, can bring them sadness and depression, like sex.

    Four years ago I used to have the same feeling and that led me to leave most of my friends if not all. I had so much difficulties dealing with others because nothing was in common beween us.

    Slowly, I started to learn about Islam and the way Muslims believe in God. And that was the truning point of my life. I totally found all the answers for my questions that kept drilling down my brain for many years. The holy book of Muslims, Quran, was such a help for me. After reading this book, I became totally convinced that its words are the real words of God.
    After this experience, all my life has changed dramatically. believe it or not, since 4years up till now I have had no depression at all even for one day. The only sad days that pass by are those when I feel I am not getting close enough to God on that day.

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  • GJP

    Gp to church

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  • violet3

    I really do feel sorry for you dude but hey why not try going to church (if you don't already), therapy, meeting new people... just do something instead of living a depressing life.

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  • RedSheep18

    I know this may not be the place to say this but I couldn't help thinking it when I came across your story. I'm a Christian and I believe that God made everyone of us with a desire to be with him in our hearts. I also believe that when we feel empty, that this is him prompting us to look for him. Often we try and fill that emptiness with other people, movies, food, tv, books, alcohol, drugs, anything but I believe that the only way to feel whole is to start to get to know him through his word and his son Jesus. I've often felt how you have, especially after my father passed away, and I've found that just picking up a bible and reading some of the New Testement really helps me to feel whole again. It's your choice ultimately, but I think it would really help you.

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