Extreme feeder sex

I also have theis fettish, although I wouldn't inflict it on someone I loved in real life, infact my boyfriend is very slim. In all honesty I hate having it, it's very confusing and conflicting. I would never want to cvhange the man I love, and although I have these weird fantasies I'd never want to change him for the world.

I'm so glad you found someone who loves you. You were right- he was into you for the fat and not for you. Congrats on escaping an abusive relationship! I'd advise not getting the surgery. As long as you can move there is hope for losing some weight without needing to have your internal organs mutilated. What you said about eating being a great pleasure for you... well, I have to admit that statement makes me a little nervous (they've had Dr. Phil episodes about that) but I'm not going to judge because, well, I'm not you. I have to admit, though, thinner people tend to have happier lives and the whole exercise=endorphins thing is nice. Whatever you do, be happy! I battled bipolar disorder for a long time, and being unhappy just kills any hope you have in life. Rock on!

Well for one partygal07 sounds like an anorexic, self centered, superficial bitch.

Anyway, I would definately suggest losing weight due to the fact that it CAN hurt your health.

And I've actually never even heard of a fetish like that...but damn...that must be really hard to deal with having been with a man like that. That's just as bad as men yelling at girls to lose weight. No one should ask the other in a relationship to change their body, unless it IS indeed for their health and not cosmetic reasons.

Good luck with your weight loss and remember, any man that puts way too much emphasis on appearance, whether it be fat or thin isn't worth shit.

I'm into exactly the same thing as your ex was and it's hard to find someone that is either into this fetish or willing to participate in it. It's not so much that he wants to change you, well it is. I'm in a feeder/feedee relationship with the love of my life. This is something that she's into also so it's been easier for us than it has for the both of you... So, getting back to him wanting to change you. It's about adding to what is already there. It's definitely a love for fat and wanting more of it. It's not easy to explain to someone that doesn't "get it". Now, for how he handled everything. He did it completely wrong! He was probably soooo excited that he thought he'd found someone that was willing to satisfy his fetish. You never know, if he was more mature about things and not jumping to, "I want you to weigh over 500 lbs!". Maybe starting off with a lower weight or something MIGHT have worked???

Don’t try to explain the situation to the civilians. People who are brainwashed into thinking that there has to be a victim in a relationship like this will never understand that they are very wrong. There is such a perverse fear of obesity in our society today that it breeds a negative impression of anyone that isn’t at least trying to lose some weight. It also sends a very strong signal that anyone who is actively trying to gain weight is either mentally ill or a victim of some kind of diabolical abuse. This societal anti-obesity concept is propagated by a culture that is obsessed with placing far too much value on appearance. The worst part of this whole anti-obesity concept is that it is a hypocritical one; as concern for individual health is routinely used to mask the shallow nature of the obsession with looking thin. I for one find this more disgusting than any form of feederism or sexual kink short of child molestation. The faux outrage expressed in many of the comments here are testament to the ridiculously hypocritical nature of it all.

Face it we feeders and feedees are few and far between. We practice of special brand of kink in the privacy of our own lives and we do not seek or expect approval from any of the general public. Especially since most of us already know that the concerns and outrage expressed by outsiders is based on the fact that they are full of shit. If it wasn’t so sad it would be almost laughable that so many of these intellectually challenged excuses for human beings are only getting revved up over this because they are the same lowbrow creatures that think nothing of paying good money to buy tickets to see the Jerry Springer show.

*SIGH* unfortunately some people take this way too far.. being forceful with getting someone to eat can be very fun when you have that fetish and can put you in a nice dominant state of mind, but if the person you're with cares more about their fetish than your feelings, it's not worth it. I have that same fetish, my ex WANTED to gain weight, it was lovely, we had ALOT of fun until his doctor got on him and I encouraged him to try and lose weight. I loved him more than his fat. That's the way it should be.

You poor, poor girl. Listen, Men like him DON'T appreciate women, they DEGRADE them. What he had you do was degrading. "Feeding" women severely damages their health, turns them into sexual human vacuums, and implies that all they could possibly do to make themselves beautiful is to do these things that damage their bodies and sometimes their minds!

He is positively DISGUSTING for leaving you.

A man that doesn't care about your wants, needs, health, or happiness is not worth your time. All hope is not lost.. I am so very sorry for the abuse you endured.

And just so you don't get me wrong, I am a fat girl, too. And I have a boyfriend who loves my body not because it is plump, but because it is MY body and he loves ME. If I lost or gained weight it wouldn't matter to him unless it was starting to severely damage my health to the point of death. I am not bragging, I am only saying that there are men out there who will love you for the right reasons. Ha, if someone can love ME unconditionally, I'm sure someone will love you that way too. Just don't sell yourself short and remember you deserve a good man.(send me a message if you need someone to talk to <3)

You should have realised he didn't love you if he was trying to change you. To him you were nothing more than his sperm-whale.

I think you should try losing that weight though, it's really unhealthy.

This guy is a perv, you did well at leaving him.
I don't think Feederism is wrong, I'm a bit of a feeder myself, but I know the difference between a perversion and a preference; and he had a perversion, he didn't care about you he only wanted you for your body, he's as bad as those guys obssesed with skinny girls.
Of course, anybody can want a woman like that or being a woman like that, but that's your choice and you can't endanger someone's health for a fetish.
You need someone who loves you and your body. You can be with a Feeder, so long as loves you and respects you. Or you can loose weight and find someone you loves you anyway.

The Point is: Avoid those who don't make you feel confortable and safe. You deserve better

dump his ass. get healthy for you. If he loves you he'll stay with you even after your skinny.

he needs therapy. his fetish is too far

I look at sex and fetishes this way... What is normal for me, might be completely weird and uncomfortable for you. Humans are weird. Sex is weird. Fetishes... Those are pretty weird too. I try not to judge others for their proclivities, but it sounds to me like you don't share your man's particular fetish. I dated a feeder back in college. I got very sick, lost a ton of weight, and he promptly dumped me for a SSBBW. No joke. They seem quite happy together, really.

However, if *you* don't enjoy it, it's probably not going to be something that you can do forever. It's not normal for you. Maybe you have fetishes of your own or not. It doesn't matter. The control issues with feederism are a concern as well.Some people really enjoy this kind of interaction with their partner. Nothing wrong with that, but this is clearly not working for you, and it seems a little bit abusive or controlling on his part. Obsessive too, perhaps. I wouldn't consider it abusive if you were both completely into it, completely consenting, and both aware of the dangers. It's your health that could be at risk.

Ultimately it's your choice, NOT his. If you choose NOT to particpate in this, it's no blemish against those who enjoy this fetish together in a safe, trusting, stable, and (hopefully) loving relationship.

It simply means it's not *your* normal, and you don't need to feel bad that it's not. Based on the detail given here, I'd say this guy is a bit selfish about it, or obsessive. All women are beautiful in their own way, and I know you'll find someone who will treat you as the goddess you are... with love, and not control.

Feederism fetishists are related to rape fetishists in the sense that the person doesn't turn them on, the person they're fantasising about can be batshit ugly. The dominance turns them on. They like to be in control. It's clear that he DOES NOT love you, this is an abusive relationship. You don't love him either, you're dependant on him which is common in abusive relationships. Get out of the relationship, eat healthily, go to the gym, start jogging, and loose the weight. At your weight it'll be difficult, but weight loss surgery at your age (you sound like you're in your twenties) is not the right choice.

Don't listen to him and try to loose some weight. It seems like he doesn't really care about you. Women shouldn't become anorexic or morbidly obese just to satisfy someone's crazy taste.

What is a feeder?

Damn it. Wrong button again. One of those votes is supposed to be a "Yes"

Since there is a lot of comments I will confess to not having read them nevertheless I would like to add my two cents if I may. I am a very large person myself. I weigh roughly about 380 pounds. Because I am so large it has been really difficult to date and fall in love. Recently learning about the BBW world has given me hope that I will not be single forever. (Now if only I can find a guy who likes larger women AND who lives the same moral values as I do.) With that said I just wanted to add that while I believe there is absolutely nothing wrong with having personal preferences (Let's face it we all have them.) I believe it becomes wrong when preferences turn into fetishes because when that happens love for the person takes a backseat to love for the fetish and that is not healthy in any relationship. Even if both people have the same fetish it is still all about the fetish and not about the people involved in it. Although food has been a downfall of mine for a very long time I wont claim to understand the feeders and eaters fetish. It's one thing to prefer to be with fat people but to not recognizing how unhealthy and limiting such a lifestyle can be for those who are being coerced or are choosing to be morbidly obese is not love. It's downright selfish. That is why when the person decides to loose some weight to be healthy and active they run the risk of loosing the person who claims to love them the most.

I find this post easy to masturbate to.

I think he should never have ever tried emotional blackmail to keep you, or control you at all. He should have been greatfull for your inittial willingness, and i hope you enjoyed that bit of libiration also. But he went too far. Good on you. although i think feederism is normal. It is always about your wishes and your body. He makes the rest of us who apreciate feeding, look like total frieks. There are extreems in behaviour in every taste, belief, fetish, Etc, not just feederism. And i hope natural justice does its wonders here.
Live well, eat well, love life, try everything more than once.

Extra: Start a friken Bakery

`hey not listening to what others think is def the best thing to do and just do you, Me I had a hard time not letting what people said get to me, I was overweight most of my life at the age of 21 i weight in at 450 pounds :)

lazy and all that shit is not always true, i was very active in weight training and all that cardio crap but never seemed to loose alot of weight anyways I ended up getting Gastric Bypass surgery at 22 and now i weight 215 and i love my body now, the surgery aint that bad

ask the doctor about an appetite suppresent called Phenthermine it really works and if u have a costco near by they have a pharmacy which sells it for under 20 bucks its prescribed so you cannot just go in and get it,

anyways its up to u, i would recommend the surgery it will improve health problems plus confidence in yourself if not then it's your life do as you will.

Some men like this I dont know why but you were right to end it with him yous obviously didnt want the same thing. I would try and give up the KFC too thats poison

I think it's sick your health comes first I'm a big girl WAS 460 now i'm 280 .. you don't need weight loss surgery nor do you need to give up foods you love.. exercise more and drink plenty of water .. make sure at least 50% of what you eat is fruit and veg. there is nothing wrong being bigger or liking yourself the way you are there is also nothing wrong with enjoying the occasional take out.. Weight loss surgery is the lazy way out and getting off the weight doesn't change your lifestyle .. you need a lifestyle change. more then 50% of people who have wls gain it all back as they arn't willing to change lifestyles..
as for this guy feederism is a dangerous game

pick carefully

Wow I'm so glad that you and him be apart now. Getting fatter and fatter is not a good health for you. He is not the one for you. Well good luck on the loosing weight.

You did the right thing! Sometimes, fetishes take over a person's life. It sounds like that was what happened to him! You as a person became secondary to the fetish object--fat.

HE'S the one who is not normal. Hopefully he gets help.

I understand the feeder fetish mostly because I have a friend who is a feeder. However, I agree with alot of the comments here that this is indeed an abusive relationship. Ultimatums that jeopardize happiness - especially health - should never be made.

Furthermore, in terms of your current weight, you DO need to drop because whether you see this or not, binge eating or compulsive over eating is an eating disorder. I just got discharged after 5 weeks of treatment for an eating disorder and a lot of people who were in program with me had binge eating or compulsive over eating problems. Please PLEASE research the effects on this disorder and realize you need to get help! You might be happy wiht your body but I assure you your organs and your body aren't happy with your body. keep yourself healthy.

Overweight is not healthy, and a man who has no greater fantasy than having sex with a fat roll is quite perverse.

Good for you putting your foot down. I'm glad you've got a new guy. Keep up the good work and you'll get that weight off! :)