Fear death because your bedroom is a complete mess

50% Normal
2 Comments

My bedroom is a pig sty. Cobwebs, dirty clothes and shoes strewn all over the floor, a very dusty curtain, an accumulation of cigarette packates and empty alcohol bottles I'm afraid of sneaking out.

For fear of embarrassment, I can never in my right mind allow a single soul in my bedroom. And I've contemplated suicide a couple of times but have always put it on hold because upon deep reflection, it would surely be an embarrassing sight of my bedroom if my bedroom was ever accessed by anyone other than me. I'm the only one who is used to the mess that is my bedroom by far. It should be noted that outside of my "inhospitable" bedroom, I appear well kept and well groomed. I observe good oral hygiene, I always strive to wear clean and well pressed clothes.

Occasionally, I clean my bedroom from ceiling to floor, and I must admit, i feel really pleased about this. But after a week a so of daily blackouts from heavy drinking and smoking, it's back to "square pig sty".

The thing is, I'm naturally a loner and don't mind being on my own, but the fact that I've countless times found excuses to discourage people.. even loved ones alike from meeting me in my bedroom on grounds of hygiene and tidyness issues is worrying in itself.

I have a lingering fear that if I ever die unpredictably, (which is usually the case,) on one of my worst "bedroom mess days", then I would have to leave the rest of my afterlife in eternal shame.

Voting Results
50% Normal
Based on 4 votes (2 yes)
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Comments ( 2 )
  • girlinadarkcorner
    2 years ago

    Just try to take some trash or dishes out every time you leave your bedroom. Like if you go out to the kitchen to get something or go to the bathroom just take some cigarette packets or any small bits of trash with you to throw out.

    As for sneaking out bottles of alcohol or things you don't want others to see, try to clean out your room some time at night when everyone is asleep or when others are out of the house, and throw it in the bin outside.

    Also try to make a habit of not smoking inside your bedroom and go outside if you can.

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  • kelili
    2 years ago

    Pick everything that is lying on the floor.

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