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Am a 19 year old African american guy. this sounds strange to me but will like to know others opinion. is it strange to have a girlfriend for a year and no sex? in fact am a virgin and she is not.
What's wrong with that? Not everyone has to jump in the sack right away.
and even if she's not a virgin, she may be regretting her earlier decisions. Perhaps she's content to wait until you're ready. or perhaps she's decided to take the slow path with you
Exactly, when I had my first sexual relationship, I waited 8 months. And in fact, it was worth the wait. Neither did I ask all the time if we would have sex. It'll just happen, and pushing it only makes it worse. She won't feel comfortable, and it'll hurt her.
or like one woman i know...
if she's dating a guy she know won't last long in a relationship, she has sex sooner to get it out of the way before they break up.
but if it's a man she really cares about, one she hopes will be around for a while she'll wait because the journey with him is more important than the destination
oh my god. If I held out on my bf we would be broken up already! holyyyy cow a year????
Pahahaha I gave in after 2 days!I grabbed him and said "do me right now!"
and he did:)
i have had my girl for three months. and have got nothing. and i wont be getting anything for a few years. i not conplaining. it will make it better in the end.
Finally, someone intelligent.
However, she might've had some sexual drama. Rape for example. Or maybe she wants to get married first. The guy didn't ask did he?
It's not abnormal, I've been dating my boyfriend for a little over a year and we have not had sex and I am still a virgin. I don't understand why so many people on here are telling you to give up this relationship because she is not having sex with you. No one on here except for the OP, maybe not even him, knows the circumstances of how she lost her virginity, if she has only had sex once, etc. What if she wants to take things slow? What if she wants to wait for her next time until marraige? There are so many things we as the readers don't know. And if you really care about someone, are you really going to give them up just because you haven't had sex? I'm not saying that any type of sexual activity is bad in a relationship is bad, it is normal and healthy for relationships, I'm just saying that is that what so many people base their entire relationship off of? I think this is sad. Times like these make me a bit sad about people.
There's also a probibility of bad experiences with sex, perhaps rape.
Thing is, you're absolutely right. You're one of the very few people on IIN who I can't argue with, even about details.
And yes, people like them are either trolling, or just being sad. The thing is, and I think you can agree with me on this, is that the intelligencelevel on such people is often lower then actual intelligent. They're rather simple. This may sound arrogant, disrespectful, or whatever, but it's what I think.
To the op...I think you're obviously a classy guy who has a lot of respect for your girl. There's nothing wrong with her wanting to wait and make sure...but I'm sure it's frustrating at times. Hang in there and good luck.
Hmmm....
Maybe she wants to see where your relationship is headed before she have sex with you, maybe she wants to see if you are in it for the relationship and not only for the sex.
If it bothers you that much then just ask her, but please be calm about it and try to understand if she says that she doesn't want to.
Hope this was of any help, good luck
Get out now! If you really love her and she claims she loves you then you both need to see someone to work this out....if not then you better get used to a long life like this! I know because I've been there....it's not fun at all....but your young....make your choice now it don't have to be this way!
A YEAR! holy shit i couldn't do it.....i like to test drive before i buy.
A year for a non-virgin to not be having sex with her boyfriend?!
Unless she has something like vaginismus or one of you has Aids (Very unlikely if you're a virgin), then that is totally abnormal.
I would discuss taking things to the next level with her and find out how you both feel about sex and how important it is for each of you.
Well hey its good to be a virgin, people who say that virginity is overrated are dumbasses. Why not make the next move in your relationship which could eventually lead to um intercourse if that is what you and your girl want.
Its normal man.
As long as she knows what her other duties are in taking care of laundry, cleaning, and cooking your meals then sex really isnt that important. You could just buy a hooker to take care of that need if you think its that important anyway.
Of course if it was me I wouldnt be a giant pussy like you are and when I got home from work it would either be time for some loving or time for some smacking but thats just me I guess.
There are so many possibilities to her behaviour that you would greatly benefit from just asking her. Good luck.
If you like her enough to consider marrying her then it might be worth waiting.
If not and sex is what you want I would say don't try to push her just find another woman.
Seriously, you should talk to her. She's not a virgin, so maybe, and I hate to say this, but maybe she's not TRULY emotionally invested in you. I say that because I am female and I know that for women, no matter what a girl tells you, sex is about the need for an emotional attachment with a man, whereas sex for men is more about the need for physical intimacy. Either that or she's just physically tired.
this is a way to get top comment lol, anyway, is that all u want from her? sex? Wow
im in the same situation, excpt its the other way around with me and my boy and he cant understand why i keep saying no, i hate the pressure, take it slow, drop the topic and just see what happens, maybe she wants a proper relationship and leave out the sex..
Really, no offense, but your boyfriend sounds rather pushy. To me, he sounds like someone who is just after sex, nothing more, nothing less.
I like taking it slow you know, it really prepares you emotionally aswell. People have tended to forget the value of a relationship.
What I'm trying to say is, maybe you and your boyfriend have different intentions and thoughts about your relationship.
I think it's normal. I agree with Violet333 that it's good to be a virgin until marriage.
Virgin until marriage, no.
Maybe it's because I don't give alot of emotional credit to marriage. To me it's just a piece of paper and a ring. Oh and a party.
Frankly, sex is there to enjoy, but it's also you, sharing your body, your deepest parts, with another Human being.
People tend to sleep around to enjoy sex, right?
The thing is, people forget the value of a relationship. Not only emotionally, but also sexually. Sexually, it's way more pleasing. Sex with random strangers (Never did so, thank fuck for that) seems... dull. It's the same, ol' thing that's commonly known and enjoyed. But the thing with relationships is, you can explore sex with eachother.
Anyway, I'm getting off track here.
My point is, sex isn't for marriage only, sex is for the one you truely enjoy it with. Emotionally, and physically.
Half the girls on IIN won't suck dick. She's just taking it one stage further.
If she's not a virgin I think it's weird.Personally, I can't imagine being in a relationship without sex. Tell her if she's not going to give you anything, then sex doesn't matter to her, and you'll get it somewhere else. She can't honestly expect you to hang in there for so long. Also, when it has passed such a long time, sex might become pressurized. So that it's kind of hard to actually go there. I think you need to take it calmly and let it come naturally.
You should find out her reasoning, she might be taking it slow, a relationship shouldn't entirely be based on sex... or maybe she's just bad in the sack and is putting it off... ask her
Shes shagging others guys.
How much money are you spending on this broad?
Either she's cheating on you or she wants you to let her know when you're ready to lose your virginity lol
Just hope she's not getting the sex elsewhere but hey just because she is not a virgin doesn't necessarily mean she needs and has to have sex. Some girls are patient and can do well without it for some time.