Ask Your Question today
I just met a new guy and things got a little heated the other night. We were talking about our desires and fetishes, and he very shyly asked if he could have a pair of my underwear that I'd worn. Is this a normal thing for some men to want, or is this guy a creep?
I find it kinda creepy and objectifying. I am not just a thing, my lady parts are not just things and don't nobody get to have a keepsake of my cooch to enjoy when I'm not around. I am not my vagina, but rather my vagina is a part of me.
Sure I've had requests, but I turned them down, besides I don't wear cheap underwear. Well, maybe now I wear some relatively inexpensive stuff. When I was younger I used to wear silk and I sure as hell ain't giving those nice expensive drawers up so some creep can get a whiff of me whenever he wants!
I'm saving myself for a loving soul mate in a long term, committed, monogamous relationship and he'll have a lifetime all access pass to my Rose garden.
THAT ESCALATED QUICKLY! but, its opinion and you're entitled to it. I love the smell of my wife's dirty underwear, she leaves in plain for me to "use". I don't see her as a vagina on legs. When its in sexual context though, I will "objectify" her.
Pretty normal except that you just met.
As is the case here that sort of request can creep some people out
Having a panty fetish is not abnormal, but my question would be, if he confessed this so early in your relationship, what the hell is he holding back until you guys get to know each other better?
I don't know if I'd call it "normal", but there are alot of guys who want ladies used panties. There are even women who sell old panties to them online.
I bought a pair once.
But when they were described as 'used' I think they meant they were used to strain some canned tuna and cottage cheese mixture.
Yuck!
Yeah I'm the OP. I'm a little off-put by this guy honestly. He comes on far too quickly. Like it's fine if you have that fetish, but maybe don't tell me that after just a few days of talking... I think he is going to get friendzoned.
Wouldn't it be creepy if you found a hidden room at his place with dozens of panties individually pinned up and labeled in frames on the wall, like a bug collection!
But, but...does he know about...us?
And what about me? Don't I get a pair?
:p
Your underwear most likely smells like you and the smell of a woman's "goody parts" are loaded with pheromones. Especially when it a woman a man is attracted to and can be very arousing. He obviously likes you or he wants to wear them which in the grand scheme of things isn't so bad. If it's to masturbate with, then at least you know when he does, he's thinking about you. Fetishes are usually harmless and not commonly acted upon. Same with fantasies in my opinion. Take solace in the fact that he has the courage to be honest and share that information with you. Once he is scared to communicate about his sexual desires, it can be hard to open up ever again and can Lead to an unfulfilling sex life in the relationship. Encourage and reassure him that you don't think he is a freak or he won't ever share another fantasy/fetish with you again. Definitely should check his dressers and make sure he isn't a panty collector though. That's odd.
I don't believe that it's normal, BUT . . . when I was in the service, many of the other guys brought a pair or two back to base to establish that they got laid. Maybe. What really grossed me out was comments like 'smell my finger', etc. Don't necessarily feel one way or other about monogamy, but believe that sex is a private act. No to Braggin' rights.
I ask if she turns me on. I wish I had a pair from every girl I had sex with. Photo-album like.
If he just "out of the blue" asked for a pair if your panties, in a new relationship, I would agree with you that's a bit creepy, but you say things got a bit heated up and the two of you were discussing fetishes and desires. In that context I think his request was perfectly normal!
If you two aren't both on the same page why waste time pussyfooting around? May as we'll find out now so you can both move on toward whatever you're looking for!
No it wasn't out of the blue. We indeed were talking about sexual desires and such. But the slightly frightening thing is that he said "That is the most tame of my desires."
Well what the heck are his other desires?
You really missed the boat if you didn't ask HIM that question! You might have some common interests that you could have a lot of fun sharing together. I always wished that me and my wife could have such a conversation. She has never admitted to having any fantasies, or desires, other than straight sex in the missionary position, and she claims she NEVER played with herself, and thinks it's sick that I do.I can't even share any of my fantasies with her, because like I said, she already thinks I'm sick, just because she thinks I JO a lot.
I enjoy having a pair of panties from someone I am with / seeing . I don't know if I would be asking after just meeting them , possibly if I felt really comfortable and I found her really attractive . I like the scent of a woman in many areas , nothing filthy just the gentle , natural scent of them .. especially if her chemistry is a perfect match for you . I think it's pretty normal but I can many opposing this statement .
Ok it sounds disgusting yes...but some straight men find a woman's scent very attractive so yes it may be that he just wants to get aroused by you even when you're not around