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....to have a guide dog. Because I really want one so I'm thinking if I'm not blind enough yet I'll smash my good eye with a rock.
I have no fucking idea but that wins the internet for today and it's not even 12 o clock yet.
you could wear sunglasses and put a bandana on your dog that says service dog.My one coworker did this.She eventually got kicked out of Walmart when they figured out she was making it up.
I would say just get a normal dog but you seem insane and I don't want that on my conscience
In most areas, you need to be legally blind (worse than 20/200 vision) and have a doctor's authorization stating that you legitimately need a guide dog. Reason I mention this is there are a lot of guide dog frauds going on now sadly.
Gouge your eye out with a stick and cast into the fire. And if your right hand offends you, cut it off as well. God will see that you do not need them. Better for part of your body to be cast into the fire than your entire soul be cast into the lake of burning sulfur! Actually, I'm an atheist. Buy a Boa constrictor. They don't bark.