How to tell difference of asexual and depressed ?

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I have been kind of depressed since I was 15 years old and I am now 25. I had a therapist 5 years ago suspect me of clinical depression but nothing came of it. I have been offered antidepressants twice in the last 2 years because of how much worse i've gotten but I declined.
The reason I decline is I have a "small" phobia of trying new things including pills. The phobia is basically a fear of an acute allergic reaction. I think it stems from how my throat very often feels tight due to my nearly constant state of anxiety so sometimes I feel like I am choking. Its made me fear actual choking very much...
Its also because clinical depression runs in my family and i've had a few friends with it. I've seen what anti-depressants does to people so I rather not take them...
I have a big problem with relationships which is I cannot experience enough sexual attraction to desire sex.
I feel attraction for people but there is no desire to do the deed. I keep getting rejected because of it, sometimes even accused of stringing them along but its understandable.
I wonder if I could be on the asexual spectrum or just depressed....
I can't remember anything else because I had my first boyfriend at 18 and by then I was already struggling.
I felt a lot of attraction for him, he's the one i've felt it the most with. Then he fucked me over badly which made me much much worse. So that's pretty much it. If a lack of desire to have sex is caused by depression can you fix it??
Even if I took antidepressants those usually reduce lust as well... so it's the same. Is it just find a really good therapist and try to beat the whole depression????
Is it ever possible to beat clinical depression??????

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Comments ( 1 )
  • malaparte
    2 years ago

    Feel the same way sometimes, but I'm probably best described as "bisexual." Orientation deals with attraction, not so much with rather you're actually in the mood or able to fuck another person. You can have a low sex drive and still have a sexual orientation. You can experience some form of attraction to someone and still be disgusted by the idea of actually having sex.

    Depression and asexuality are not mutually exclusive, though most of the times, having some form of medical issue which is preventing you from having sex would not be classified as "asexuality." Asexuality is generally not context-dependent, and it exists as a trait or set thereof in a person regardless of their health or mental stability - asexuality is an orientation, not a medical condition.

    You may be on the ace spectrum, or you might be an allosexual with some form of medical issue that is prohibiting you from having a sex life. Or you could be ace and mentally ill. Personally, I think you're allosexual and your depression + meds which are commonly known to destroy sex drive (I've been there before) are prohibiting you from being able to fuck anyone or maintain relationships.

    I don't know how to beat the whole clinical depression thing, unfortunately. You may need a change in medication and recognize lifestyle factors, but as I am not a doctor and I don't know your history, I won't be answering that for you.

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